Help Me Remember (Rose Canyon, #1)(59)

She nods. “It’s a piece, I know, not the whole thing, but . . . it’s something.”

“It’s something.”

I turn to Jax. “Please excuse us.”

Brielle shifts her gaze to him, waves, and then turns to me. “That was rude.”

“Maybe, but I’ve never liked that guy.”

She raises a brow. “Jealous?”

“No.” Yes.

“I remembered that song. I remembered, and I was right.”

“You were.” I stop her on the center of the dance floor, extending my hand to her. “Dance with me?”

She looks around. “It’s kind of hard to say no since you brought me here and have your hand out.”

“Do you want to say no?” I ask as the music starts to cue up.

“I don’t.”

“Good.” I smile.

The last time we danced was two nights before the shooting. We stood in her apartment, the ring securely on her finger, and we danced. No music was needed. We just swayed as though we knew every step and beat in perfect harmony.

Brielle’s fingers play with the hair on the back of my neck. “Your hair is long.”

“I haven’t had time to get it cut.”

“It’s weird sometimes,” she says absently. “I don’t know anything about your life for the past three years. I don’t know anything about where you’ve been or what you’ve done besides what I’ve found on the internet.”

I smirk. “You googled me?”

“Don’t be so smug.”

“I’m not smug.”

“Yes you are,” she chides.

“Fine. A little.”

Brielle grins. “I just want all of my memories back.”

Me too. Me fucking too.

Brie sighs. “Are you going to tell me why you pulled me away from Jax?”

Because he loves you and can’t have you.

The other part is that, when I was talking to him, warning bells were going off. There was something in his posture, the structuring of his questions, that left me uneasy. He has always had a crush on her, but then there’s something in my gut that won’t ease up. He’s still staring at her as though he’s waiting for something, and I don’t like it.

“What else do you remember about him?”

I turn her so she’s out of his line of sight. “Why aren’t you answering my question?”

I huff. “Because I’m not allowed to.”

Brielle turns her head. “I know, but . . . whatever. I don’t remember him so much as the name and the song. I really hoped—” She stops and chews on her lower lip.

“What?”

She looks back to me, eyes filled with sadness. “I thought I’d see someone or something tonight that would break this fog. It’s why I agreed to come to this ridiculous dinner.”

“I hoped for the same.”

“Too bad it didn’t work. You know, some days, I wish I didn’t remember anything about my past at all.”

My eyes widen at that confession. “Why?”

“Then it wouldn’t be so painful. I wouldn’t know how amazing Isaac was or how happy I was when I got the job I can’t work at right now. I wouldn’t have remembered Henry or cared at all about who this mystery ring belongs to. I could start over. I could build a life without the past looming over me as though it’s ready to drop down at any moment. The flashes are the worst part. It’s like someone opening their eyes to the sunlight and having to slam their lids closed when it burns.”

“Don’t close them next time, just turn your head and look at me. I’ll shade you so you can still see.”

The sadness that was heavy in her beautiful gaze is gone, but something else is there. Something like wonder, and God, I’d give anything for it to stay there. “Spencer, can we go?”

“Go where?”

“Anywhere. I just want to talk, and you’re the only person that makes me feel normal.”

From the corner of my eye, I see Emmett watching us, arms crossed over his chest. I don’t care about anything but her. She’s asking me for something, and I will never deny her. I know that I will tell her a million lies and beg for forgiveness before I can walk away.

“Sure. Let’s go.”

It’s a beautiful night. The clear skies allow the twinkling lights to offer promises of wishes. I wrap my coat around Brie’s shoulders and we lean against the deck railing, looking out at the lake.

“Do you remember the night Isaac jumped in the lake in February?” she asks with a laugh.

“He was so mad about losing that bet.”

Brielle turns her head with a grin. “Mad is an understatement.”

“So is saying that he was cold.”

“That too. I couldn’t believe you wouldn’t let him off the hook.”

There was no way I was going to do that. He bet me that I couldn’t go three days without saying no. Well, I did, and he had to pay for it. God knows I paid for all the stupid things I had to agree to. “Would you have?”

She shakes her head. “Not a chance. Just like I didn’t let you off the hook when you lost the bet with me.”

“Which one?”