Healing Gabe (The Last Hangman MC #3)(34)

“I…” I swallow hard. “You fell for me?”

“Yes, long ago. I’ve never moved on from those feelings, but I can’t give into them.” he says sadly.

“Why did you date Annie then? Why not tell me how you felt? And why would you tell me that now and then tell me you can’t f*cking give into them? Seriously! I’ve been in love with you since the first time we met. I’ve been going from place to place always having you in the back of my mind, never able to move on because of those feelings I had for you, kicking myself for never telling you how I felt even though I came so close so many times, all that for you to tell me twelve f*cking years later you feel that way for me?” I tell him, f*cking pissed. “I’ve lived in fear that someone would attack me for the past twelve years. I’m done living in fear. I didn’t know why I came back here but now I do, I wanted to be with you all along, Gabe. I don’t know why I still do after you keep playing those stupid f*cking mind games with me, but I still do,” I say softly, frustrated with him and myself.

“We don’t have to, but it’s the reality of how f*cked up our lives are. Do you have any idea of what has happened these past couple of months?”

I shake my head. “No.”

He sighs. “Ayden was kidnapped by a f*cking psycho. Charline nearly died at the hands of Brian, Al-“

“From the Kings?” I look at him, scared.

“Yes. You know him?”

I nod. “He was around when I was forced to be around them. He was still a prospect at the time but he was a f*cking psycho. He was always up to go after people for payback and according to Jared, he was good at it.” I frown.

“He’s dead now. Aleck killed him, nearly died in the process too.”

“Good riddance. What happened to Aleck?”

“He was shot by one of the Kings’ prospects, Charline killed the guy and saved Aleck and myself.”

“I’m glad she did,” I say softly.

“Me too.” He sighs and moves the empty containers to the side and tugs on my arm, pulling me in to his arms. “I missed you. I missed having you in my life. It wasn’t the same anymore, wasn’t right.”

“It wasn’t the same without you around either. I had a mad crush on you the first time I saw you. I had noticed you around town for a while but was too scared to talk to you. I was devastated when you picked Annie over me.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?” He lifts my chin so I’m forced to look at him.

“Because she had fallen for you. I wanted her to be happy and maybe have a chance to get out of this grave Trent had been digging for us.” I sigh.

“Do you think that if things had happened differently between all three of us that she’d still be alive?” He kisses my forehead.

“Trent wasn’t the type of man who’d take no for an answer, especially when it would go against what he wanted and slow him down. Annie and I not doing what he wanted us to do was putting a huge dent in his plans to make the biggest MC in Louisiana. He was too hungry for power and money that no matter what, he’d eliminate whoever was in his way, us included. You being with her might have sped up the process, but in the end, the outcome would have been the same. I’d have had the same fate as her too.” He strokes my hair and I kiss his chest.

“How did you get out? What was your life like?” He caresses the small of my back, drawing random patterns.

“The day of Annie’s funeral, I managed to sneak a bag out of Trent’s house with a few of my belongings, what I’d need the most. I asked Cabe to help me out to take Trent down and well you know what happened that day. That night, as I was leaving, Cabe followed me on his bike and stopped me. He gave me 10K and fake papers and ID. I left Louisiana and prayed that they wouldn’t find me. A couple of times I saw them around where I was staying. I guess Trent had their charters keep an eye on me to scare me. It worked sometimes but I moved whenever it was getting too dangerous. I worked in bars, diners, restaurants, anywhere I could to get money. That’s pretty much my life for the past twelve years. As f*cked up as it was, I wouldn’t change it, I got to travel the world.” I smile softly.

“I’m glad you got out. Sounds like life wasn’t so bad on you after that.”

“I know and yeah, it was good. I can’t complain. I just need a place to call my home.”

“Don’t we all?” He kisses my forehead.

“Yeah…” I say softly.

“How did you end up here?”

“After you left this morning, I cleaned the house and was so pissed. Every piece of furniture and every room would remind me of what happened between us so I left. I drove aimlessly all day and I stopped to figure out where I was so I could head back home and turns out I was sitting outside my old home. It took me a bit to decide whether to come in or not, but I’m glad I did. So many memories though, but it’s good to be back here and weirdly enough, this feels more like home than it did back then.” I sigh softly.

“That’s because this is the only thing that’s left of your family. I wish I was still living in our old house.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right. Why aren’t you?” I look up at him.

“They burned it down years ago. No one was hurt but we lost everything. Cabe let us stay here for a while until we found a new place to live in. Doesn’t feel like home either.”