Gone (Deadly Secrets #2)(51)

He lowered his mouth back to hers, and she opened to his insistent kiss, opened her mind to possibilities she’d never thought she’d have again, opened her heart to the only man she’d ever loved.

His hands streaked down her sides and around her front to free the snap on her jeans. In one swift move he pulled them off her legs and dropped them on the floor. She groaned as he kissed her again, as his hand moved down her belly. And when his fingers slipped between her legs, she trembled, held on to his shoulders tighter, and rocked into his hand until the pleasure overwhelmed her.

He drew back from her mouth long before she was ready to stop kissing him. Startled, she opened her eyes only to realize he was wriggling out of his jeans faster than she’d ever seen him move.

She watched as he wrestled his wallet from his jeans, pulled a condom free, and ripped it open with his teeth. But the need to feel him overpowered every thought, and as soon as he was sheathed, she reached for him, pulling his body back over hers and his lips right down where they belonged. “Come back here.”

He groaned as his tongue slipped into her mouth. And when his bare flesh slid along hers and his familiar weight pressed her into the mattress, she opened her legs and kissed him harder, drawing him inside her, right where he belonged.

She trembled at the way he filled her as if they were made for each other. Her body felt on fire, her skin ultrasensitive. Kissing her harder, he began to move.

“Ah, Raegan . . .” He kissed the edge of her mouth, her cheek, moved to her ear and sucked the lobe between his lips. “Need this. Need you . . .”

She needed him too. More than she’d realized until this moment. “Don’t stop.” Her eyes slid closed when he hit the perfect spot, sending sparks all through her body. “Don’t let go.”

“Never could,” he rasped. “Ah God, not gonna last. Come with me, Raegs.”

He groaned, and when she felt him grow harder inside her, the pleasure ignited, sending a shock wave all throughout her body. “Oh yes, Alec . . .”

She cried out as it consumed her, was unable to do anything but let it pull her under. In a daze, she heard him grunt, felt every muscle in his body tighten. And knew the shock wave was consuming him too. Exactly as it should. Right along with her. The way it had always been.

He stilled against her, his hot breath fanning her neck and shoulder where his face was tucked against her. Slowly, she became aware of the comforter beneath her, his sweaty skin against her, and the twitch of his back muscles under her hands. She realized something else too. That this wasn’t a fantasy or a dream. Alec was on top of her, still inside her, and she didn’t want to ever let him go.

She had absolutely no idea if he felt the same.

She knew their meeting with the Ramirezes had affected him. Knew by the way he’d been watching her that he’d felt something. Knew whatever that something was had pushed him to kiss her in the living room. But did he want more? Did he want any of the same things she did?

Panic rushed in. A panic that came out of nowhere and stole her breath. A panic that was rooted in the fact she’d barely survived losing him once. If this was just his needing comfort because he felt sad . . . if this was nothing more than casual sex—no matter how incredible it had been—she was in trouble. Because she wasn’t anywhere near as confident and put together as he thought. And he had the power to destroy her if she wasn’t careful about what she said and did right in this moment.

He pushed up on one hand and looked down at her, his face flushed, his eyes sexy and sated and . . . assessing. “Sorry that was so fast. It’s been a while for me.”

Oh no. She couldn’t think about how long it had been for him or whom it had last been with. Not when her heart was already racing on a roller coaster. She focused on a mole near his collarbone. “It was fine.”

“Fine.” His eyes narrowed. “I see that wasn’t the only thing that was fast.”

She didn’t have a clue what he was talking about, and right now she didn’t want to ask.

One corner of his mouth curved in a sexy smirk. He lowered to his elbows and brushed the damp hair away from her temples. “I almost forgot how fast your brain can flip from pleasure to pondering.”

She frowned, still staring at the mole. “I’m not pondering.”

His smile widened. A mesmerizing Cheshire grin she saw from the edge of her vision and which made her blood hot all over again. “Yes, you are. Your brain always worked faster than mine.” He leaned down and kissed her. “Don’t think, wife. Just let it be. Just feel.”

His lips moved to her ear, and she shivered at the wicked sensations rushing over her skin, but the pain cutting through her heart kept her from getting lost in him all over again. “I’m not your wife, Alec. Not anymore.”

He eased back and looked down at her, but this time there was no humor in his eyes when they held hers. There was only truth. A truth that rocked her way more than his body ever could.

“You’ll always be my wife, Raegan. A piece of paper doesn’t change that.” He reached for her hand and placed it over his heart, right where the word “Emma” was etched into his skin. “I don’t have any answers to the questions rolling around in your head right now; I just know I want to be with you tonight. Because I miss you. I miss us. I miss this.”

Tears burned her eyes. “I miss us too.”