Forever You're Mine (MINE #4)(31)

“Is this what forever feels like?” I asked before I closed my eyes.

“I sure hope so.” I fell asleep in his arms with a blissful smile on my face.

And a deeper love in my heart.

*

“Landon!”

A ripple of fear washed over me like a tsunami and I could not breathe, only blink, grasping at the covers with all my might. I tried to suck in air, any air but nothing would pass. When my mind finally caught up to the moment, I realized why. Cannon had his hand wrapped around my throat in a death grip, his face hovering just above mine, eyes wild and wide.

Then beneath the shadows of the moonlight, he blinked. “Cora?”

Just as quick as his hand had closed off my airway, he opened it. I exhaled frantically, coughing and sputtering before finally inhaling a relieved breath.

Every cell in my body screamed for me to run, to get the f*ck out of there, but when his head fell to my lap, I couldn’t move. His body trembled as my hands met the damp skin of his back. I could feel the tension pouring off him, his demons still close by.

He began to shake, a muffled sob tearing at the corners of my heart when he wrapped his arms tighter around me. “Cora,” he said, desperation haunting his pained voice.

My name was broken on his lips and the ache in my chest grew stronger. Tears stabbed my eyes, but I held them back. I had to stay strong.

For him.

“Shh,” I soothed, stroking his head.

After a while, he finally settled, so I slipped down the bed and cradled his face. His eyes puffy and swollen, I kissed each one in turn.

“I love you.”

He didn’t say it back, but I didn’t expect him to. His eyes stayed locked with mine as he rolled on top of me, his body entering mine slowly, gently. I held him tight, allowing him to chase away whatever had a hold of him.

*

Maddie sat calmly across from me, bringing the clear straw between her lips as she sipped on her glass of water. We’d met up for lunch. A casual lunch I thought considering we’d talked about everything from how the twins were doing, to how Holden f*cked the bejesus out of her last night after they discussed renting out their old house to me.

“We’re never gonna sell it anyway. It’s too special to us. And we don’t wanna just rent it to anybody,” she said. “I need to know whoever lives there will love it just as much as we did. If we didn’t need more room for the boys, I would have lived there forever. The view is to die for and that lake…”

Maddie had a wistful look in her eye as she placed her half empty glass down on the table.

“Oh yes, you’ve told me all about that lake.”

“Well?”

“How much is the rent?” I asked, still curious even though I knew I could not afford it.

“$150.”

I gasped.

“$150 a week? No way, Maddie…I can’t afford that.”

“$150 a month.”

“You’re joking?”

“Um…no. Do you know how hard it was to get him to $150?”

“Exactly. That house is worth way more than that. Y’all just updated everything and like you said…that view. The place is gorgeous. I could never afford something so nice.”

“What I mean is, do you know how hard it was to get him from $0 to $150? That man has more money than we’ll ever spend in a lifetime and the house is paid for, Cora. We’d like someone to live there we know will take care of it.” Reaching across the table, she handed me a set of keys with a silver C on the ring. “We had it touched up over the weekend. You can move in right away.”

Holy shit.

So many good things were happening in my life.

My brother…Cannon…this.

I silently counted my blessings as I took the key, excited to start a new chapter in my life. Then I remembered what happened last night. It had been intense for both of us. I was still a little freaked out about what I’d seen in the mirror this morning. The bruises on my neck were faint thank God, and my hair was long enough to cover them up, but I had a hard time forgetting they were there. They were like a flaming red flag.

Maddie twisted her wrist to check her watch. “Shit, I gotta go. I need to be in court by 1:30.” She grabbed her purse and then reached for the check.

I caught her arm as she moved past and then stood up to hug her tight. “Thank you for everything, Maddie. I don’t know what I would do without you.”

“Awe hell, don’t make me cry.”

I let her go to find tears in her eyes. “Love you, sweetie,” she said, kissing my cheek before rushing out the door.

“Love you too.”

When I arrived back home, Cannon wasn’t there.

Home.

This had undoubtedly become my home. I spotted my favorite fleece blanket draped over the back of the couch. My flip flops were by the front door next to his mud boots. My underwear were in his drawer and last night I officially placed my heart in his hands. How the hell was I going to leave him? I needed to reassure him that this wouldn’t change anything. But in reality, everything had already changed.

My own home.

I could hardly wrap my head around it. No, I did not want to leave Cannon, but I would be lying if I said I wasn’t excited. I’d always wanted a place of my own. Something solid, consistent…an anchor of sorts. A place to always come back to. And when Winston gets out, it’ll be his sanctuary too.