Forever You're Mine (MINE #4)
K. Langston
You cannot find peace by avoiding life.
~Virginia Woolf
Fear slips over me like a thick veil of heat.
I can’t breathe.
I can’t see.
Spiraling out of control in the darkness, I carry it with me everywhere I go. Even when I am buried inside a woman. Even when I am swimming in a bottle of whiskey. I can never get away. There is no light. I will never break free and the thought alone cripples me.
It’s all my fault.
I would never get the chance to make it right. One second of hesitation cost more than I could ever imagine, and these haunting thoughts are my punishment. This is my hell to carry, and the peace I long for, will never be mine.
Love is like a war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.
~H. L. Mencken
“Oh God, Cannon, YES!”
Not the first time I’d heard my name paired with God in the same sentence. The lips of many women had praised me with those very same words. “Please don’t stop.”
Landing one hand to her ass, I gripped her supple skin while I f*cked her with mind numbing strokes. I reached up, fisting my fingers around the thin blonde strands, f*cking her harder. This is all I need.
And what a warm * won’t fix, Evan Williams will.
With a deep moan, she came for the third time since we started this freak show a half an hour ago.
I could do this all night if it meant not thinking. I didn’t want to think. Thinking f*cking sucked. Thinking took me down dark hallways in the middle of a desert. Thinking made me hesitate.
Thinking made me want to kill.
Yanking the mess of hair tangled around my fingers, I powered through my orgasm, my mind clinging to the moment and the heat of her. My cock pulsed, temporarily releasing the seeds of my demons while new ones bedded down for the night.
I pulled out, removing the condom and tying it off as I made my way into the bathroom to toss it. After I took a piss and washed her scent from my hands and mouth, I walked into the bedroom to find her sprawled out on the bed with her head propped up on her hand.
I pulled on my jeans before fisting my hands through my t-shirt. “Will I see you tomorrow?” she asked with hope in her voice.
“Probably.”
Most women weren’t looking for a one night stand much less night after night of meaningless f*cks, but Alexis was different. She was just as messed up in the head as I was, and that made us the same. We used each other.
We needed each other.
She didn’t say a word, just smiled seductively as I slipped on my boots and hit the door.
As I was climbing inside my truck, my phone vibrated with a text.
Where are you?
Smiling, I replied.
On my way.
Hurry up, we’re gonna be late!
Chill the hell out. I’ll be there in twenty.
I’ll be outside.
I pulled into the trailer park where Cora lived with her mother. Row after row of dilapidated single wide trailers were situated on overgrown quarter acre lots. She stood waiting at the end of the short driveway, dressed for work in her cutoff denim shorts, black tank top, and cowboy boots.
That smell, the one embedded inside the interior of my pickup, punched me in the center of my chest as she climbed inside. “It’s about damn time,” she said, a hint of irritation nestled in her sweet voice.
“Sorry, I got hung up.”
“Uh huh.” Digging through her purse, she whipped out a tube of that shit women liked to put on their lips. I hated that sticky shit. It looked like shit, tasted like shit, and smelled like shit. “Why do you keep lookin’ at me like that?” She asked, studying her reflection in the visor mirror.
“Why do you wear that shit?”
Smearing the shiny clear gloss across her parted pink lips, my cock swelled with appreciation. “’Cause unlike some people, I have to put in work.” She tossed me a playful wink before mashing her lips together.
Ah f*ck, here it comes.
While I did not approve of the shit covering those perfect lips, I looked forward to this next move like it was my next piece of ass. Cora formed an O with her mouth, swiping the tips of her fingers along the edges of her lips to clean up any errant gloss. I could describe the images on repeat in my mind, but it goes without saying how f*ckable her mouth looked right now. Something I should not be thinking about because Cora was my friend. And friends didn’t think about friends sucking them off right?
My dick disagreed, immediately halting blood flow to my brain. “Cannon?”
“Huh?”
“Are we going?” she asked, trading the gloss for her cell.
Shaking my mind of my dirty thoughts, I put the truck into gear and pulled away from the curb, stealing a glance at her before adjusting my hard on. I caught her smiling down at her phone and my jeans grew even tighter, reminding me that he will never give a f*ck if we are friends or not.
He wanted her.
And why are you talking about your dick in third person?
“What are you grinnin’ at?” I asked, dreading the answer I knew was coming.
Cora only smiled that way for one reason.
“He’s comin’ to town,” she whispered to her phone.
I gripped the steering wheel, anger swiftly replacing my pent up desire. “When?”