Fatal Reckoning (Fatal #14)(43)

“Anything for you—and him.”

“He loved you. I hope you know that.”

His warm hazel eyes filled. “I loved him too.”

“Remember when you were afraid he was going to have you killed for being in my bedroom?”

“I remember everything, and I’m quite certain that even in his paralyzed state, he could’ve arranged it.”

Sam laughed. “Oh, he definitely could have, but he knew you were different from everyone else the first time he saw us together.”

“After your ex-husband tried to blow us up?”

She rolled her eyes. “Ahh, yes, those were some good times, huh?”

“The best times of my entire life.”

“You need to get out more.”

“I don’t need anything other than what and who I have right here in this bed and this house.” Smiling, he gave her a gentle tug to bring her fully on top of him, putting her lips into kissing range. Anytime he looked at her that way or kissed her so sweetly, her insides still fluttered. “I think about our first days together all the time. In the midst of the madness of John’s murder, there you were, the woman I’d dreamed about for six long years.”

“Did you really dream about me?”

“I thought about you constantly. My only regret in this life is that I didn’t go after you when you didn’t return my calls.”

“My only regret is that I didn’t hunt you down when you didn’t call me like you said you would.”

“I called you the second I got back from the trip to Europe. I called you from the airport.”

“You did? You’ve never told me that.”

“If you had answered the phone, I would’ve come straight to you.”

Sam groaned at hearing that. “It’s a good thing Peter is dead, or I might be tempted to do it myself.” Her ex-husband had been her platonic roommate at the time Sam first met Nick. Since Peter had been interested in her himself, he’d failed to give her the critical messages from Nick. “What do you think would’ve happened if he’d given me those messages?”

“We’d be married for almost eight years rather than almost two.”

Sam dropped her head to his chest. “I can’t even think about it or I’ll go mad.” Raising her head, she met his loving gaze. “Thank God we found each other again, because I wouldn’t be able to survive this life without you. You can’t ever leave me.”

“Leave you? Where would I go when I can’t breathe without you? I almost lost my mind having to live without you for a week, even when I talked to you every day.”

“There are other ways you can leave me.” She couldn’t think about the people who hated him and what he stood for as vice president. If she did, she’d lose what was left of her sanity.

“I don’t want you to worry about me. I’m very well protected.”

“And yet still I worry.”

“Let’s talk about a worst-case scenario, then.”

She recoiled. “Do we have to?”

“We never have before, and every day I have to send you out there to hunt down criminals who would think nothing of taking you away from me. As much as you might worry about me, let’s face it, it’s much harder being me in this marriage.”

“I know.”

“So let’s talk worst-case. Maybe if we do, it won’t have the power to frighten us the way it does now.”

“There are about twenty million other things I’d rather talk about. Such as…” She shifted her pelvis to press against his cock, which sprang to life under her.

“Quit it. I’m serious.”

“So am I.” She kissed his neck and took a gentle bite under his jaw.

He buried his fingers in her hair and compelled her to look at him. “Tell me what you would do if the worst thing happened. I really want to know.”

“Whereas I can’t bear to even think about it.”

“Humor me.”

Sighing, she realized he wasn’t going to let this go. “After my six-month stay in a padded room, I’d probably take up drinking for a living. I’d do whatever it took to dull the worst pain I could ever imagine feeling. Just thinking about it is unbearable.”

“For me too.”

“What would you do?”

“I’d make sure that you were honored for your service the way your father was, for one thing.”

“You’re so much better at this than I am. I’m in a padded room while you’re seeing to my legacy.”

The sound of his laughter went a long way toward relieving some her tension and reminded her that despite the what-if game, he was very much alive. Thank God for that.

“I’d be out of my mind with grief,” he said. “Don’t ever think otherwise.”

“Would you remarry?”

“Would you?”

“I asked first. Answer the question.”

“I probably wouldn’t. How would I ever top this?”

“What if someone came along who made you happy again?” She seethed with jealousy at the thought of him with anyone but her.

“What would you want me to do?”

Sam flashed a big goofy grin. “Stab her with a rusty steak knife?”