Eleanor & Grey(20)

“I like that,” he told me.

“The ice on your face?”

“No. I like it whenever you touch me.”

My heart stopped beating, I stopped breathing, and Greyson kept smiling.

I didn’t respond, because I had completely forgotten how to form words, but I was certain my reddened face told him exactly how his words had made me feel.

“So, I know today has been eventful, but if you’re up for it, I got one of my grandpa’s favorite kung fu movies on DVD. I figured maybe we could watch it at my place,” Greyson offered.

“Sure, that sounds fun.”

We headed back to his house, and even though I kept looking toward Greyson’s bruising eye, he seemed unfazed by it all. He simply began humming a tune, so I began humming along with him.

We hummed the whole trip back, right until we walked up to Greyson’s house and his smile faded away.

There was shouting coming from inside the house, and I could see his parents hollering at one another through the front windows.

Greyson’s whole demeanor shifted as embarrassment took over. He turned to me and rubbed the back of his neck. “Uh, maybe we should hang out another time.”

“Yeah, it’s fine, not a big deal.”

“I’ll talk to you later?”

“Yeah, of course.”

I turned to walk away, but then glanced over my shoulder to see him staring at his house with such a look of defeat. It was clear he didn’t want to go into the house with the screaming.

“Hey, I’m still not ready to go home,” I said. “Do you want to maybe go to Laurie Lake to just hang out for a little bit longer?” He needed the break. He needed something to shut his mind off of his own sadness.

Maybe he needed me just as much as I needed him in order to not be so broken.

He looked up at me and I saw a flash of relief wash over his face. “Yeah, okay. Let’s go.”





“Are your parents always like that?” I asked as we sat on our log at Laurie Lake.

“Even more so lately. I just don’t get it. If they hate each other that much, then why even bother being together? I can’t even think back to a time when they actually liked one another.”

“I’m so sorry, Grey. That has to be hard for you.”

“It’s easier when they aren’t home, and luckily they are hardly ever home. Besides, next year I’ll be off to college and it won’t matter much at all.”

“Still, I’m sorry.”

I couldn’t imagine living in a home without a strong type of love. My parents swam in each other’s love as if their hearts were oceans. They held one another up whenever times were hard. Their kind of love made the world a better place to be in. I couldn’t imagine them ever not being completely head over heels with one another.

They were the greatest love story I’d ever witnessed, and it was so hard to even imagine the two of them being apart. I swore their hearts beat together as one.

If there was one thing that I knew for sure, it was the fact that there was no Kevin without a Paige.

“I just never want to be like that,” he confessed. “When I fall in love, it’s going to be real. It’s not going to be a love for convenience, it’s going to be a forever kind of love. Otherwise, what’s the point?”

“I agree.”

“But I do have to thank my parents. If anything, they taught me what love isn’t, therefore I’ll know what it is when it comes.”

He kept doing his nervous fiddling thing with his hands, and I swore my heartbeats were directed straight to him.

“Sorry. We can talk about something else,” he offered. “Maybe we can talk about us.”

Heart skips and heart flips.

“Yeah? What about us?”

“I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately, you know.” Greyson’s head tilted toward me, and we locked eyes. “About what it would be like to kiss you.”

I swore he controlled my heartbeats with those words. We hadn’t really talked much about things like that, about us and if there were any feelings involved other than friendship. The most we’d ever done was hug, for goodness’ sake, and a hug from him was enough to set my world on fire.

For a while, I’d thought my crush on Greyson was a one-sided thing, so to hear those words come out of his mouth somewhat felt like a dream.

“Do you ever think about that, Ellie?” he asked.

I inhaled slowly. “Only always.”

He inched a little closer to me, and I let it happen. He tucked my hair behind my ears, and I let it happen. His smile melted every part of me, and I let it happen.

“I think about it a lot. After we hang out sometimes, I beat myself up for not just doing it. I overthink it. Like, it should’ve happened when we got ice cream, or when you first brought me here. Or on Molly’s steps.” He scrunched his face. “Probably not on Molly’s steps, but still, I think about it.”

“Me too. All the time.” I paused. “Well, not all the time, but yeah…all the time.”

He placed his hand in mine and gave it a slight squeeze.

“I just want it to be perfect, you know? Especially now that I know it’s your first kiss. That’s important. In the novels you’ve had me read, it always happens naturally,” he said softly. “I take notes when I’m reading on how the hero does it, on where it happens, on how comfortable or uncomfortable both the characters seem.”