Eleanor & Grey(16)

That afternoon my thoughts slowly shifted in a new direction, because Greyson took the time to look my way.

Who knew being seen could feel so good?





6





Greyson





Mom and Dad were fighting again. It was late into the night and I had nowhere to escape to, so I locked myself in my bedroom and put my headphones on, turning up my music real high. It was almost impossible to drown them out, but I tried my best to do it.

As I sat in my bed, staring at my ceiling, I thought about ideas of things Eleanor and I could do when we hung out again. I thought about places she might like to see, and things she might like to do.

I tried to figure out foods she could eat with braces, so she wouldn’t be annoyed when I devoured pizza. I thought about if maybe I should bring her flowers to make her day a little better, but then I thought maybe she didn’t like flowers. Not all girls liked flowers, though a majority of them did.

Then I thought about her smile.

She always had a tight grin, and she hardly showed her teeth. Maybe because she had braces and she was insecure. But she had nothing to be insecure about. When Eleanor smiled a real smile, it was the prettiest thing I’d ever seen.

Mom called Dad an asshole, and I heard something shatter.

I turned up my music, and focused my thoughts more.

Skating.

I wondered if Eleanor liked roller skating.

I’d really love to take her skating.

Even though I’d probably fall on my butt.

That night I just kept thinking about Eleanor. Lately thoughts about her seemed to be the only thing that kept my mind from spiraling. I knew I told her that I wanted to be her friend to keep her from being lonely, but maybe I needed a friend just as much as she did.

Maybe I needed her even more than she needed me.





“Okay, pick out as many books as you want, then we’ll head off to part two of today’s adventure,” I told Eleanor as we walked down the fantasy aisle of a used bookstore. It had only been a week since the last time I saw her, but I swore it felt a lot longer.

“Oh, Grey, you should never say those words to a bookworm. We’ll need a U-Haul to carry the books out of here,” she semi-joked.

“All right, then let’s just stick to two for now and then we’ll move on to the next stop. There’s no rush, though. Take your time.”

She headed off to find her two books while I tried my best to narrow it down to five.

I went with a fantasy and a horror, and she chose a historical and a comedy.

I was definitely going to borrow her novels from her once she finished reading.

“Okay, where to next?” she asked, holding her books to her chest.

“We’re gonna go to a coffee shop and read our books. I figured that’s what people do—drink coffee and read.”

She blushed but she tried to keep me from noticing her reddening cheeks. She turned away from me a bit, and it was fucking adorable.

“Oh, cool,” she said. “I’ve never really had coffee, though.”

“What?! And you call yourself a bookworm?” I laughed. “I haven’t really drank coffee either, but we can learn what our favorites are.”

She smiled, and that was fucking adorable, too.

I loved it when she smiled, and I meant really smiled, showing me all of her braces. Her real smiles meant she wasn’t sad for a moment, and that was good. It was so important in life to have a few moments when you weren’t really sad.

We headed to the coffee shop a few blocks away. After we walked in, we tried almost all of their specialty drinks.

I wondered if Eleanor noticed my eye twitching from the caffeine high I was experiencing.

Though, she probably missed it, because she was busy being really talkative. Maybe that was what happened to her when she had caffeine—she became less shy.

I learned that I liked mochas. Eleanor was more specific about her likes, though: two sugars, one pump of vanilla, extra cream.

After we found our beverages of choice, we stopped talking so much because we were both too busy drinking coffee and reading books. Every now and then, though, she’d glance my way and smile, making me smile back.

Her smile was really growing on me. I could get used to seeing it once a week.

After a few hours, we made the walk back to her place. I loved how she hugged the books against her chest as if she was cradling babies.

“You know what I didn’t think about over the past few hours?” she asked as we reached her front porch.

“What’s that?”

“Cancer.”

I grinned.

Good.





We started seeing each other more and more, and if we weren’t seeing each other, we were talking on AOL Messenger. I’d tell her my favorite kung fu films, and she’d toss me her favorite novels. Then, we’d do the homework of watching the films or reading the books and we’d report back to each other with our thoughts.

When she’d babysit Molly, she’d first walk to my house, where I’d be sitting on my front porch, waiting for her arrival. Then I’d escort her three houses down, cross the street with her, and walk her to Molly’s. Then, as I walked back to my place, I’d think about her smile.

I’d think about her laugh, and her favorite cardigans, and how she’d light up when she talked about a good book. I’d think about how her smile looked more like a frown whenever I asked for an update on her mom. I’d think about the things that made her happiest. I’d think about the things that made her sad.