Becoming Calder (A Sign of Love Novel)(87)

The next thing I knew, the gentle patter of rain was hitting my window. I rolled over and tried to drift back to sleep, but the particularly hard pinging of a drop hitting a particular surface, kept me from falling back into my dream. I groaned and put the pillow over my head, but the pinging every few seconds continued.
For a minute, I let the memories of watching Calder pledge his commitment to someone else assault me, feeling the hole in my chest open up again. Now I'd never fall back to sleep. I'd lie here all night imagining Calder and Hannah sharing the same bed . . . eventually.
Ping!
I stayed in bed for a few minutes, listening. The pinging stopped, so I threw back my blankets, put my feet on the floor, rubbing my eyes and standing to look out the window. I startled and clamped my hands over my mouth when I saw a form right outside, looking in at me. As my eyes widened, I saw it was Calder. For the love of the gods!
I hurriedly opened my window and grabbed onto his shirt, pulling him inside. He climbed over my desk and stepped to the floor, a puddle already pooling beneath him.
"What are you doing?" I hissed, closing the window.
"I had to see you."
I stood back. "We promised not to risk this."
Calder breathed out. "I know, but Eden, after today, I had to see you. You know I had no choice."
My shoulders sagged. "What did he do to you?"
Calder ran his hand through his hair, droplets spraying out around him.
"He told me to leave here or marry Hannah."
"Then why didn't you leave?" I whispered miserably. "Maybe that would be the better thing to do. You could have gone ahead and waited for me and Xander—"
"With a hundred and something dollars? I've never even met the girl who's going to help us." He stepped closer and cupped my face in his hands. "I can't leave you here, Eden. I did what I had to do to stay near you. And maybe this way," he looked away for a second and then back to me, "Hector's attention will be off us even more. I made it sound like I thought it was a good idea."
"You didn't even look at me," I said, tears filling my eyes. "Not once did you even look my way."
"I couldn't. Hector was watching me like a hawk. And if I had looked at you, my feelings would have been all over my face. And I knew," he took my chin in his fingers and tilted my face up to his, "I knew you were being strong, Morning Glory. I knew you trusted I wouldn't be going through with any of this if it wasn't for us."
"It just made me wonder . . . it made me wonder, if you wonder what it would be like . . ." I shook my head, exasperated with myself for being so tongue-tied.
Calder tipped my chin up with his pointer finger. "Then ask me, Morning Glory. All you ever have to do is ask me."
My heart flipped as I stared up into the dark beauty of his eyes, those ridiculously long eyelashes. "Do you wonder what it would be like to be with another woman?" I asked.
"No," he said. "I've never wanted anyone except you. Not for one second, not ever."
I released a breath. "Thank you." I looked down, biting my lip. Relief flooded my chest. Calder was stronger than I gave him credit for. I almost felt sorry for Hannah. She wouldn't be able to help but love him, even if only a little. I didn't want to wish her pain, but I couldn't bear for her to be with Calder in any way physically. "I just . . . there has to be something we can do . . . if you get married—"
Calder shook his head. "The only person I'll ever marry is you."
I furrowed my brow. "How will you avoid it? Can we leave sooner?"
He brought his hand up and massaged the back of his neck. "If we have to. It doesn't make me feel very secure in our plan. But yeah, if we have to."
"I'll be ready anytime."
"I know," Calder said, taking my hand and leading me to my bed. Outside the rain came down harder.
"Does Hector ever check on you?"
I bit my lip. "He checked on me once, but I don't think he will anymore. Hector put a lock on the outside of my door a few days ago. I'm not sure why."
Calder studied me for a second. "Bars will go up on your window once he contemplates the fact you're brave enough to scale the roof."
I let out a very quiet laugh. "Or that you're stupid enough to scale the roof."
Calder grinned. "I think he simply believes we've caught each other's eye, nothing more."
I nodded, but didn't mention how I'd confided in Hailey. That hadn't been smart. I had just thought for a brief moment she might help us. But she hadn't.
Calder looked at me seriously. "Just the fact that I've looked at you has made him crazy though, Eden. This," he moved his eyes around my room, indicating where he was, "is truly stupid. I just couldn't stand you not knowing what I was thinking. It was killing me."