Beautiful Broken Promises(44)

“What do you mean?” I asked with a nervous croak in my voice.

“I was dead asleep when they came in and grabbed me. It took me too long to put together what was happening. They put something resembling a cloth over my eyes and a hand over my mouth.” Her fingers grazed across her lips, as she appeared to be remembering the violent incident. A tremor ran down my spine. “It wasn’t until this doorway that I woke up fully and understood that I was being taken. When we reached about here…” She pointed to the tiled foyer. “I began to panic and started doing everything I could to escape them. I couldn’t scream because their hands were too tight so I started thrashing about. I had no idea someone else was carrying Braden and Kate. I wanted to hit something… anything that could wake you guys up. Right as we were stepping through the doorway, I got the blindfold off.”

She paused and suddenly I needed to know everything—every single detail she could give me. Maybe I needed to punish myself in any way possible. I deserved to be tortured by each and every word that came out of her mouth. I gripped her hand again and pulled it up to my lips. Not exactly a punishment, but Raegan and I appeared to be functioning off of small, reassuring touches. We both seemed to need it, and I liked that I could help her in that way.

She continued when I finally let our hands fall back down. “Once I got the blindfold off, someone slammed my head right here. I don’t remember much else until we were in Mexico. When I realized they had… taken the babies as well I was immediately sick at the idea of what had happened while I had been out. But when I finally came to, Mrs. Flores was just rocking and singing to them, like they were her own children. God, I hate that woman.”

I instinctively pulled her toward my chest and kissed her forehead, where I assumed that scum had forced her head into the wood. It was ironic that I was kissing the spot right next to her newest forehead injury. I still didn’t know what had happened and every time I brought it up, she shied away from my questioning. I guess I was going to have to give her time. It also seemed brutally ironic that she began and ended this journey almost the same.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered.

A lightning bolt shot up my spine and I stiffened like a two-by-four. “What did I tell you about that, Rae? I’m the one that’s sorry. God, my stomach drops every time I think about that night. I had just come off working thirty straight hours, and I remember that I’d passed out the second I hit the pillow. It’s not an excuse though, I should have f*cking heard something.”

She spun in my arms and looked up at me, her short stature evident due to our close proximity. She didn’t seem to notice that her hands were placed against my chest, but I sure as hell did. Another part of me began to notice her nearness as well. I cursed my libido and tried to remind my brain to stay in the appropriate state of mind.

“It wasn’t your fault,” she said softly.

I ignored her attempt at pacifying my self-disgrace. “You were so strong. You took care of Kate even though…” My hand ran down the side of her face and cupped her chin to hold her gaze.

I was battling two major sides of myself. One side wanted to tell her how appreciative I was that she took care of Kate, even when Kate really wasn’t her child to care for. She raised her into this beautiful, intelligent little girl, and I couldn’t even begin to put into words my extreme gratitude.

But this other side—the side that was quite forceful—wanted to grab her little waist firmly in my hands. I wanted to lift her up so she could wrap her toned legs tightly around me. This side wanted to take a hold of her mouth with my own and push her up against the wall. I wanted to show her exactly what I could do to that perfect body–exactly what I think her eyes have been pleading with me to do.

Currently, those beautiful green eyes were boring into mine and I felt her need in my bones. God, did I want to appease her. And myself.

“Mama, I have to go potty!” Kate’s shrill voice cut through our sexual tension like a bucket of ice-cold water, dousing all of the fire running through my veins.

I clutched both sides of Raegan’s head and kissed her hair. “I got her,” I said and retreated toward the hallway with Kate’s little hand in mine.

Not long after I showed her where the bathroom was, the doorbell rang. Through the peephole I could see my five-foot-two, gray-haired mother practically bouncing on her toes.

I laughed to myself and opened the door. Her little body slammed into mine before I even had it fully open.