Absolution(16)

The doctor seemed to take a moment longer to answer. She checked her clipboard again before crossing her arms over it, a slight frown creasing her brow. The mood turned sombre and the young doctor seemed to take on the appearance of someone much older and wiser than her years. A chill crawled up his spine.

“I’m afraid she hasn’t been as lucky.”

The next few sentences coming out of her mouth were jumbled. His brain struggled to make sense of them, turning the words over like puzzle pieces, trying to fit them into place. It didn’t matter which way he turned them, nothing seemed to make sense.

“I don’t understand,” he said finally, his heart pounding.

He turned to Jane and Maggie, sitting beside him. They stared back at him in horror.

The doctor calmly continued. “Ally’s spinal cord has been badly damaged. She has fragments of bone protruding into her spinal column that need to be removed and her spine needs to be re-aligned and stabilised with surgery.”

Tom’s heart pounded in his ears. He shook his head. “I’m sorry – for a minute there I thought you said she was paralysed?”

“That’s right,” she said gently. “I’m very sorry.”

Tom stared at her in shock, his brain struggling with the implication of the word.

“It’s permanent?”

“I’m afraid so. The blunt force trauma that occurred as a result of the accident caused irreparable damage.”

Tom’s heart raced as his mind flew over the possibilities. “You said that the surgery is to remove bone fragments – won’t that fix it?”

“Removing the bone fragments is only part of the problem. The damage has already been done. To give Ally the best chance of recovery, we’ll be surgically fusing metal rods to her spine to stabilise it and allow her to heal faster, so her rehabilitation can commence as soon as possible.”

Tom stared at her in shock.

“I’m very sorry. I know it’s a lot to take in, and as you said, it’s been a long night – we’ll talk more in the morning. Right now, we have her heavily sedated but she’s stable. We’ll keep a close eye on her overnight and prep her for surgery in the morning.” She paused briefly. “There’s no doubt this is a life-changing situation for her, but she’s twenty-six years old and she’s in good health otherwise. There’s no reason she can’t continue to live a very full life.”

Tom couldn’t think of a single thing to say. Instead, he nodded, swallowing back tears as Maggie slipped her hand into his.

“The best thing you can do right now is take your son home,” the doctor suggested gently. “There’s nothing more you can do for Ally now – we have an excellent medical team here, we’ll take care of her.”

Tom nodded again, clearing his throat. Suddenly, all he wanted was to hold his son in his arms.

“Doc – Jack and Callum, do they know about Ally?”

“Yes, they know. I’ve just had this same conversation with both of them.”

Tom’s heart sank. “Can we see them now?”

“Of course,” the doctor said, getting to her feet. “I’ll take you to them myself.”

Jane and Maggie stood with her, clinging to each other.

“Can we see Ally too?” Jane sniffed.

“She’s in the ICU tonight, but yes, you can see her, briefly. Like I said, we’re keeping her sedated until surgery tomorrow. She’ll remain sedated for a day or so post-op, but when she starts to regain consciousness she’ll need you – all of you. So it’s probably best that you try and get some sleep tonight. The next few days might be rough.”

The last thing on Tom’s mind was sleep. This was a parent’s worst nightmare. Something that you couldn’t fix – something that no one could fix.

Maggie snaked her arm around Tom’s waist and he returned the embrace automatically. He glanced over at Jane, tears streaming down her face, and held his other arm out to her. She immediately obliged, burying her face in his chest and sobbing uncontrollably.

He stood with two sobbing women in his arms, feeling utterly useless.



Jack had lain awake most of the night. Tossing and turning, unable to turn off his brain, he had gotten up a little after two. He shuffled into the kitchen in boxers and a t-shirt, bare feet padding against the cold hardwood floor. He stared into the fridge, with food still stacked neatly inside, and wondered if his father’s death had been some kind of dream. It seemed such a normal thing: food in the fridge. How could something so normal belong here?