Wanted by Her Lost Love (Pregnancy & Passion #2)(26)

It was the most romantic, exquisite kiss she’d ever been given. It was a kiss that told her more than words ever could that this man cherished her. He wanted her. He would have her.

And when he finally pulled his mouth away, he tugged her into his arms and stood holding her tight as the moon bathed them in pale light.

Nine

Kelly pulled the nightgown over her head and warily glanced down her body. There was no doubt the garment was beautiful. A concoction of lace and satin that floated over her skin and molded to all the contours.

But she felt far too exposed. Her br**sts looked too…big. Her belly looked enormous. Thank God she couldn’t see her feet.

She eyed her door, knowing she was supposed to go to Ryan’s room after she’d undressed for bed, but she couldn’t seem to make herself take those few steps.

It wasn’t that she didn’t trust Ryan. No, it was herself she didn’t trust. She’d already made a big enough fool of herself when it came to this man. Once back in his arms, snuggled up close to him, she’d probably lose what little common sense she had left.

She sighed and sank onto the edge of her bed. Her hesitation was just another sad indication of the rift in their relationship. She’d never been inhibited around Ryan before.

He’d often be propped up in bed with his laptop, his brow creased in concentration as he worked on who knew what. She’d crawl into bed with exactly nothing on and tease and taunt him until his laptop and work were forgotten.

He used to laughingly say that he knew better than to bring work home because she never let him get away with it.

And now she couldn’t even bring herself to walk into his bedroom.

A knock sounded at her door and then it opened a crack. Ryan stuck his head in. He stopped when he saw her sitting on the bed.

“Everything okay?”

She nodded.

He eased the door all the way open and walked in. He stood in front of her for a moment and then sat down on the bed next to her. He didn’t say anything. He simply laid his hand on her lap, palm up, and waited for her to take it.

After a moment, she slid her hand over his. He twined his fingers through hers and squeezed gently. Then he stood and pulled her to her feet.

“We’re both tired,” he said. “Let’s turn in and we’ll worry about tomorrow when it gets here.”

That didn’t sound like the Ryan she knew. He was a man who planned everything to the nth degree. He had schedules, lists, planners, calendars. He not only worried about tomorrow, but the next year as well.

He led her into his bedroom and motioned for her to get into bed. He hung back, maybe out of deference to her obvious unease. Taking a deep breath, she crawled beneath the covers and turned so she’d face away from him when he got in.

The bed dipped behind her, and she felt his warmth as soon as he slid beneath the covers. He moved about for a few seconds and then the next thing she knew, he was flush against her back.

He wrapped one arm over her and pulled her in close. He nuzzled her hair before resting his cheek over her ear.

It was all she could do not to break down. It had been so long and it felt so right. Just like so many other nights in his arms. She’d missed him. Unbelievably, she’d missed him.

“No past,” he murmured in her ear. “Just us. Right now.”

She closed her eyes. It had been stupid to agree not to bring up the past. They might not talk about it but it loomed over them like a cloak of doom. It lay between them, awkward and unwieldy. There was no forgetting the past.

What they were doing was called denial. And it wasn’t particularly effective.

He kissed her neck and snuggled a little closer. He cupped his hand over her belly affectionately. But the moment was bittersweet. This was how it should have been between them all along.

“Relax and go to sleep, Kell. I just want to hold you.”

And oddly enough it was what she wanted too.

When Kelly opened her eyes, the first thing that registered was how comfortable she was. And warm. The second thing she realized was that she was on top of Ryan.

Not just on top of him, but sprawled across him as if she owned him. Her cheek was plastered to his shoulder and her forehead pressed against the side of his neck.

It was the way she’d woken every morning when they’d lived together.

Appalled that she could betray herself like this, she started to ease away but Ryan tightened his arm around her.

“Don’t go. This is nice.”

She raised her head and stared into eyes that were unclouded with sleep. Evidently he’d been awake for a while and content to lie there with her draped over him like a blanket.

“One thing hasn’t changed,” he said as he touched her cheek. “You’re still beautiful when you wake up.”

She soaked in the words, her heart tugging at the sincerity in his voice. Before she could question her sanity, she slowly lowered her mouth and touched it tentatively to his.

He seemed surprised and pleased by her taking the initiative. He lay still while she carefully explored his firm mouth.

She licked over the closed seam, and when his lips parted, she slid her tongue lightly over his bottom lip before moving inward to rasp over the end of his tongue.

Strong hands gripped her upper arms, holding her in place as he began to kiss her back. Softly at first, as if he was wooing her, and then harder. His breath sped up and came in little bursts through her mouth.