The Recruit (Highland Guard #6)(100)

Her eyes shone, and something tightened in his chest. He felt a nearly overwhelming urge to take her in his arms. But he doubted his ability to touch her and not give in to the urges that had been plaguing him for thirty-seven blasted days. Though who was counting?

He nodded, breaking the connection. “You must be tired and wish to ready for bed.”

Her face fell. “You are leaving? But I thought …”

The disappointment in her voice tugged at him. Damn it, didn’t she know how hard this was? His fists clenched at his sides, fighting the primitive instincts that seemed to take over every inch of his body when he was in the same room with her. After a fight, it was even worse. His blood was pumping even hotter. “You thought what, damn it? The last thirty-seven days to the contrary, I am not a bloody monk, Mary. I want you so badly, I can’t see straight.”

Her eyes widened. She gasped. “You do?”

“What did you think? That I would lie beside you every night and not want to make love to you?”

“You know exactly what I thought. I thought you were exhausted from being with another woman.”

“I don’t want another woman.”

It was the truth. And tonight after seeing her almost fall, he would finally admit what had been staring him in the face but his pride wouldn’t let him acknowledge: he loved her. She was going to hate him when she learned the truth, but he loved her in a way that he’d never thought possible. Apparently, he was just as susceptible to emotion as everyone else. It had only taken the right woman.

She’d been different from the start. It wasn’t just because she hadn’t fallen at his feet—although he could admit that might have been part of it initially—but she challenged him, intrigued him, didn’t seem to be interested in his accomplishments but in him.

He didn’t even mind when they argued. Actually, he kind of liked it. He could lose his temper around her and not feel like a bully—she just gave it right back to him. It was strangely freeing—invigorating even.

For the first time in his life, he didn’t feel the need to impress, the need to be the best. But he wanted her to believe in him. He wanted her trust, even if he didn’t deserve it.

If he weren’t so tormented, he might have enjoyed the look of disbelief on her face. “You don’t?”

He shook his head. “I haven’t been with another woman since I met you.”

It was clear she didn’t believe him. “What about the woman in the stables?”

He wanted to tell her it was his sister, but how could he explain? He couldn’t. “It wasn’t how it looked.” Unable to resist, he reached down and smoothed the back of his finger along her cheek. Her skin was so soft it made his chest squeeze. Hell, everything about her made his chest squeeze. One look at those big blue-green eyes, those delicate features, the lush pink lips and baby-soft skin, and he was so filled with emotion there wasn’t enough air left in his lungs to breathe. “I only want you, Mary.”

Mary’s heart was pounding so hard and loud she could barely hear. Had she really heard him correctly? Part of her said to leave it, that “I only want you” was enough for now. To take the morsel that he’d given her and be happy. The other part—the cautious part—knew it wasn’t. “For how long?”

He was holding himself so still, only the burning intensity in his eyes as he looked at her betrayed the fierceness of the emotions battling inside him. He knew what she was asking him. She wanted commitment. Fidelity. A promise.

He didn’t hesitate. “For as long as you want me.”

She stilled, everything inside her coming to a sudden stop. Her heart seemed to be hanging on the edge of a precipice, ready to tumble over at the barest nudge. “What if that is forever?”

He gave her a wry smile that tugged at every string in her heart. “Then you’ll make me a very happy man.” He tipped her chin so she would meet his gaze. “If you haven’t guessed, I’m in love with you.”

Mary’s breath caught high in her throat, hearing the words she thought would never be meant for her. She was stunned, awed, and full of disbelief at the same time. It seemed impossible that this could be happening. She’d thought her chance for happiness was behind her. That any hope of the love she’d once dreamed of as a girl was gone. But here was this incredible man telling her he loved her.

If she listened to the voice of experience, she had every reason not to believe him. He was every bit as handsome, every bit as magnificent, every bit as popular with the women as Atholl had been. But he wasn’t Atholl. And this wasn’t the past. If she listened to her heart, and judged him on himself, she knew it was true. From the first, he’d always treated her differently. She’d recognized it, but hadn’t wanted to believe it.

She slid her hands around his neck and raised up on her tiptoes, pressing a soft kiss on his mouth. Their eyes met, and what she saw there gave her courage. She spoke the words that fear had kept at bay. “I love you, too.”

It was as if a dam had burst and all the emotion, all the feelings, that had been held back between them came rushing out in a torrential wave.

He groaned, wrapped his arms around her, and covered her mouth with his.

He kissed her. God, did he kiss her! He kissed her until her knees were weak and her heart wanted to weep with joy. The warm slide of his tongue sent ripples of emotion fluttering through her heart.