Sweet Addiction (Sweet #6)(84)

Lucas kissed her gently, his lips moving warm and tender across hers. “Do you love me, Ren?”

“You know I do,” she said huskily.

“Then that’s all that matters to me.”

She drew in a deep breath. “All right then. If you’re sure. Then yes, I’ll marry you.”

Even as she said the words, it felt like she was closing a concrete seal over a tomb. Her heart ached with grief. For Cole. For a man she had loved and did love. Would always love.

But perhaps in time it would dim and fade and she wouldn’t think of him so much. She’d done it once. Had gotten on with her life when she hadn’t been able to imagine doing so. And she hadn’t had Lucas then. Not for nine long years. But she had him now and no matter what she felt for Cole, she did love Lucas with all her heart and soul.

A kernel of peace settled over her soul. In time she wouldn’t feel so raw. She just had to get through the present.

She smiled up at Lucas, her heart full of love.

He smiled back and gathered her hand in his. He traced a line around her ring finger with the tip of his.

“It’s customary for a man to give his intended bride a glittering, expensive token of his love and devotion.”

She laughed. “Indeed it is.”

“I think perhaps we should choose one together. I would want you to have a ring you’re happy with.”

She leaned forward to kiss him. “You make me happy, Lucas. Not a ring or a promise. Just you.”

His expression became serious. “You’ll be happy again, Ren. Trust me to ensure it.”

“I do,” she said softly. “Just be patient with me.”

He kissed her, his mouth sweet and possessive. “Always.”

Cole stood outside of Lucas’s home and stared up at the cozy mixture of stone and wood. Somehow he’d expected something a little more imposing. More in keeping with Lucas’s aloofness. But the house was warm and inviting. It had the look of an English country cottage. Only bigger. The grounds were immaculately rendered. Even in winter, the shrubbery was bright and alive with the promise of spring blooms.

It was a place that looked like it would be alive with love, laughter and children running about shrieking with delight and playing hide-and-seek.

There was a hole in his stomach that seemed to yawn wider with every minute he stood here trying to make up his mind whether to go in or not. Lucas had been explicit. Show up or don’t show up. But this was it. Do or die. If he didn’t take the opening now, it would never be extended again. The door would effectively be shut on Cole forever.

Even after an all-night conversation with Micah, he didn’t feel wholly reassured. Micah had been sympathetic to Cole’s position but thought he was crazy if he didn’t leap at the opportunity to have a life with Ren even if it meant sharing her with another man.

But then to Micah, the arrangement seemed almost normal. He wouldn’t even blink an eye over the nontraditional arrangement. If only Cole could embrace it as easily.

He curled his fingers into tight fists at his sides. Inside the large wooden doorway just a few feet away, Lucas was positioning Ren. He was taking her through the paces of a scene that Lucas had carefully constructed. All that was missing was Cole.

All he had to do was walk in that door and he’d see Ren again. But fear held him back. What if she had no desire to see him again? What if he’d used his allotment of second chances?

What if Ren really was better off with Lucas?

Ren walked to the center of the living room and stood in front of the stone fireplace facing Lucas, who sat sprawled in an armchair. He was in a mood tonight, one she couldn’t quite figure out.

He’d bathed her, pampered her endlessly, brought her wine in the tub and fed her bits of cheese and fruit. And when she was done, he’d dried her and brushed her hair until it sparkled and shone.

Once he was finished, he’d instructed her to come to the living room in just a dressing robe. Then he’d left her in the bedroom and gone down ahead of her.

Her skin tingled in excitement as she stared into his enigmatic eyes.

“Disrobe.”

The simple command made her shiver. She tugged at the tie holding the lapels of her silk robe together and then shrugged out of the sleeves, letting it fall to the floor.

The warmth from the flames warmed her back but it was Lucas’s gaze that warmed her from the front. There was approval, lust and …love in his eyes.

She stood proudly before him, her head a little higher than it had been in the last week. It was still hard for her to sleep at night but Lucas had brought her a measure of peace with his attentiveness.

Standing here looking at him and seeing what she now recognized as love on his face, she was tempted to break discipline and throw herself into his arms. Hold on and never let go.

But pleasing him was more important to her and now more than ever she needed his quiet dominance.

“You’re lovely, Ren. I could sit here watching you all night. There is such an elegance about you. Your features are so striking. But I think what I love most is your smile. You’ve not had much to smile about in recent weeks, but tonight I hope to remedy that.”

There was an odd note to his voice. Almost caressing. She basked in the warmth in his tone, unconsciously leaning forward as he spoke.

“Tonight you’ll decide how we start. Tell me what your fondest wish is and I’ll grant it.”