Paradise Valley (Virgin River #7)(63)

“She doesn’t have to be scared,” Rick said quietly.

Jack sighed. At least that last lacked the edge of hostility. “I’m sure she can’t help it. You’ve been ignoring her. I gotta say, I don’t get that.”

“I know you don’t. Don’t worry. I’ll talk to her. I’ll be nice as I can.”

“Rick, what the hell’s going on with that?”

He took a deep breath. “Jack, it’s going to be all right. Lizzie’s young. Young and beautiful. She’s sweet. And strong. She’ll be fine.”

“Something about what you just said sounds real bad.”

“Nah, it’ll be okay. Might take a little getting used to, that’s all. She doesn’t need a guy like me weighing her down.”

Jack had to concentrate to keep from driving off the road. “What the hell? Is this about the leg?”

“It’s not about the leg, but face it, that’s not a great asset. It’s about everything. Ever since Liz ran into me, her life has been messed up. I’m not good for her. She can do a lot better and deserves to.”

“She’s not going to agree with that. She’s going to fight that idea.”

“Well, not too hard, because that’s how it is. Jesus, don’t you think the girl’s been through enough?”

“I don’t know what to say,” Jack said, but what he really meant was he didn’t know what to say that wouldn’t include a lot of frustrated swearing. He just wanted to shake Rick until all the marbles in his head fell back into place.

“What a break,” Rick said. “Don’t worry. I’ll be nice.”

“You’ll be nice while you’re dumping her? After all she’s gone through for you? Don’t you think if she felt she’d been through enough, she’d cut you loose?”

“Next item?” Rick said. “Or have we covered everything?”

“Listen, I’m going to try to be reasonable here….”

“I thought we were moving on?” Rick answered.

Oh, he’s going to make me choke him! Jack thought. He shook his head a little violently, trying to let Mel’s voice rise to the surface, because his instinct was to stop the car and say something like, Listen, ass**le, that little girl stuck by you while you were sticking by her and if you don’t love her anymore, okay, stuff happens. But you don’t just decide you’re not good enough and shit can her like that. And you have enough f**king parts!

“You’ve been through a lot,” Jack chose to say. “Physically, emotionally, psychologically. Maybe you shouldn’t make any fast moves. If you get through some of this stuff, get your problems sorted out and get good on the leg, get the high-tech leg, and then if you still feel this way… All I’m saying is, do you have to be so sure about major changes like that before you’re fully recovered? You and Liz have been together a long time. You’re just planning to push her away right off because you’re still all messed up in your head. Which, by the way, is in the goddamn pamphlet.”

He could see Rick’s jaw tighten. “Next item?” he said.

“Aw, Christ,” Jack said.

“Look, I’m trying hard as I can! I want to do what’s right! In my messed-up head, it isn’t right to hold on to Liz or let Liz hold on to me when she can do so much better! That’s it! I’ve had months to think about it! Now—next f**king item!”

Jack took a defeated breath. “Okay. Preacher made barbecue.”

Oh God. His worst nightmare. A town gathering, welcoming him home. He’d crumble. Cry like a girl. He wasn’t up to it. “Tell him thanks. Tell him I’m in pain. We’ll catch up.”

“You’re not in pain,” Jack said.

“I am now. It’s not happening, Jack. I can’t. Do. It.”

An hour from home, Jack thought. Maybe he’d change his mind. But if he’d learned anything in the last ten hours, Rick had enough determination to get him through almost anything. Except complete recovery. “Okay, pal. Whatever you say.”

When Rick got to his grandmother’s house, Lydie was overwhelmed by his homecoming. Rick could feel Jack standing behind him, just inside the front door, holding his duffel and the prosthesis, watching as Rick embraced his weeping grandmother with one arm while he balanced the walker between them. She was so small in his big arm and he had no instinct to shut her out. She was old, frail, and had suffered too many losses in her life. For a few moments, while he held her against his chest, Rick was grateful that he could come home to her in any condition. “Hey hey,” he said. “Come on, Gram. You’re gonna drown me with those tears. No crying, sweetheart.”

“Ricky, I can’t remember when I prayed so hard. Thank God you’re home.”

“I’m home, Gram. Everything is all right,” he said, thinking about how wrong it all was. But he wouldn’t put his gram through that. He comforted her until she wiped her old eyes and just stood there in front of him, studying his face with her trembling fingers. And behind him, he could hear Jack breathe.

“I bet there’s doings at Jack’s tonight,” Lydie said.

“There is,” Rick said. “I’m just not up to it, though. It was a long ride and my leg aches. I’m going to skip it.”