Owning Violet (The Fowler Sisters #1)(79)

I can’t.

Yours,

V

I hit SEND before I can second-guess myself and resume my calendar search, hating the sound of the ticking clock that hangs on my wall. I feel like the quiet tick-tock is somehow sending me to my doom and I don’t know why. Unease slithers down my spine and I wish my office didn’t have all the windows. I need to find some blinds or curtains so I can close myself off.

I hate being on such blatant display. I’d rather be alone with my thoughts. Reliving what Ryder said to me. What he did to me.

“I’m a sick, twisted f*ck, Violet.”

“I’m no good. Not good enough for you.”

“I don’t care.”

“You should care. You’re a good girl. So pure, so sweet.”

“I’ll f*cking wreck you.”

My skin warms at the memory, washing away the unease. He could never wreck me. I won’t let him.

And I don’t believe he would ever purposely hurt me.

I have a new email and giddiness rises inside me when I see who it’s from.

My sexy V,

You invade my thoughts, too. What happened last night didn’t turn out as I originally planned. I thought you would hate me for what I did to you.

Instead, I think I made you want me more. And you made me realize that …

You’re perfect for me.

All I can think about is having you naked again. Tied up and bared to me. My mouth on your skin. My cock deep inside your body. Today is going to be torture.

I think we’ll need to meet for lunch.

R.

I press my fist to my mouth to try and conceal the smile that spreads across my face, but it’s no use. I hit REPLY and start typing.

Lunch sounds perfect. And no appetizers, please. I’m extra hungry today.

Yours,

V

His response is immediate.

What exactly are you hungry for? Tell me, Violet.

Closing my eyes, I focus on my heartbeat, steady and true. My slow, even breathing, the ache between my legs, the ache all over my body. I know exactly what I want, but I’m a little embarrassed to say it.

He won’t let me get away with being evasive, though. He’ll want me to be honest. Bold.

Your cock.

I send off my two-word email with a little smile, hoping like crazy we both remember to delete these emails immediately because oh my God, they’re awful. Incriminating.

Fun.

Glancing at the clock, I see it’s five minutes till nine. I need to get to Father’s office but I don’t want to leave. I want to be here for Ryder’s response. I want to know what he thinks about my request.

Thankfully, Father’s office is down the hall and I won’t have to go far. I could be a little late even if I had to …

My in-box shows a new message and I open it, anticipation curling through me as I wait for it to load.

You’re a bad girl.

My belly flutters. He’s the one who’s bad.

Only for you.

I hit SEND.

My phone rings within thirty seconds of my sending that email and I answer it quickly, my skin warm, my body prepared to hear his deep voice sound in my ear.

“Want to do lunch today?” Rose asks.

Disappointment floods me and I slump in my seat. “I can’t,” I say weakly. “I have plans.”

“With who? Break them. I’m your sister. I need counsel.”

Responsibility kicks in. I’m always there when Rose needs me. I can’t let her down. I never have. That’s Lily’s job. “What do you need counsel for?”

“All sorts of stuff,” Rose says evasively. “Please, Violet? We haven’t done lunch in a while and I … I need to talk to you.”

“Is everything okay?” She sounds sad. I’ve ignored her lately, chasing after my own wants and needs, and that’s not fair. I’ve always made sure I’m there for my family.

“Well, you bailed out of brunch so fast yesterday because of your so-called color emergency I didn’t get a chance to talk to you. And Lily is a terrible listener.” I can practically feel Rose roll her eyes over the phone line.

“Okay. We’ll have lunch. I’ll meet you at your office at noon. Or do you want to go a little later?” If we go later, I could possibly see Ryder for a few minutes. Just take an extended lunch. But it’s not like I can have sex with him and then go pick up Rose all rumpled and smelling of him.

God, what’s wrong with me?

“Let’s do noon. I need to get out of here.”

I hang up and shut down my computer, then head out to Father’s office. The halls are quiet, normal for an early Monday morning as everyone gets their bearings for the week. His office is at the end of the hall, opposite the small conference room, and I approach his partially open doorway, about to knock when I pause in shock at what I see.

Pilar is perched on my father’s desk directly in front of him, her legs spread, her skirt hiked up and revealing her thighs. His hands are splayed on her outer thighs, her fingers are clamped around his tie, and she’s lifting away from him as if she just …

Kissed him.

Horror and shock collide within me and I turn and run, making my quiet escape toward the elevator. Without thought I hit the button and wait, staring up at the numbers on the wall as they light up, higher and higher toward my floor … until the ding sounds and the doors swoosh open, revealing an empty car.