No Limit (Armed & Dangerous #1)(37)

“Would you like something to drink?” he asked, throwing his coat across one of the kitchen chairs. I followed him into the kitchen where he pulled out a couple of beers. “I don’t have any of the fancy shit like Blackwell.”

I held out my hand for the beer. “Don’t get me wrong, I love a good wine, but I’ve been opening myself up to trying more beers. My favorite is called Baby Maker. It’s so good.”

His lips drew back in a smile. “Baby Maker? I’ll have to try that one.”

“You’ll love it, trust me,” I said, taking a sip of beer.

He nodded toward the couch. “Do you want to have a seat?”

“Sure.” I walked around him and did a quick glance around his condo. It looked like there was only one bedroom and a bathroom. Not exactly the place you’d murder and hack someone up. If he was the killer, he hadn’t done any of it there. Sitting down, I plastered on a smile and patted the seat beside me. He sat down and tilted his beer back. “I don’t think you’ve spoken more than ten words to me since I met you. Why is that?”

He cleared his throat, avoiding my gaze. “Caught that, huh?”

I nodded and he finally peered over at me, his dark eyes curious. “I just know your job would require you to have more social skills. Not to mention, I can feel how uncomfortable you are.”

“You’re good, Ms. McFadden. If you want honesty, I chose not to talk to you in hopes of avoiding this exact situation.”

“Why?”

“Because I have no desire to f*ck you or anyone else for that matter. The guys have been throwing women in my lap for a year. I’m just not interested.”

“Oh,” I replied, taken aback. That wasn’t what I was expecting to hear. “Are you gay?”

I knew he wasn’t, not unless he came out after his wife died. In response, he shook his head and laughed. “I’m not gay.”

“Then why do you bring women here if you’re not interested?”

Guilt was clearly written all over his face, but over what? Why was he so f*cking hard to read? Blowing out a heavy sigh, he leaned his head back on the couch. “I bring them here hoping I get the desire to f*ck them. It just never happens, at least not until I met you. Even then, I still don’t think I have it in me.”

“Me? What makes me different?”

He ran his hands over his face, gaze weary. “You remind me of my wife.”

“I didn’t think you were married,” I lied.

“I was married. She died a few years back. The night I saw you I thought I was in the twilight zone. You both have the same red hair and blue eyes. For the longest time, I thought I could move on from her death, but I can’t. I’m not ready. The only reason I would have sex with you is because it’d be easy to imagine it was her.”

“So you haven’t slept with anyone after her death?” He shook his head. “Wow, I honestly don’t know what to say. I’ve lost my parents, but never someone as close to me as a lover. I can’t imagine the pain.”

“At first, it was unbearable, and it didn’t help that Blackwell and Davies kept trying to get me to f*ck other women. I decided then to put on this charade so they stay off my back.”

“If you don’t sleep with the girls, what do you do with them when you tell them you don’t want their services?” Purse in hand, I was ready to grab my gun if need be. He didn’t look like he was about to attack, but you never knew. Grief could make you do f*cked up things, but I wasn’t expecting what came out of his mouth next.

“I give them money for their silence and send them on their way.”

“Silence? What do you mean?”

“I give them money to say we had sex even though we didn’t. That way it gets the guys off my back and it makes them think I’m f*cking other women.”

“Never would’ve thought that.”

Finishing his beer, he set the bottle down on the table. “Well, there you have it. How much do you want to stay quiet?”

My heart went out to him and I could feel my eyes burning. Hesitantly, I reached over and placed my hand over his. He tensed at first, but then slowly relaxed. “I don’t need anything, Mark. As far as anyone’s concerned, we had sex tonight and it was mind-blowing. The money isn’t important to me. Besides, I already have a purse filled with it.”

He turned is hand over in mine and squeezed it before letting it go. “That you do. How about I take you home?”

“That’s not necessary. I can find my own way,” I insisted, getting to my feet.

He got up and grabbed his keys off the counter. “I’m sure you can, but I’d feel better knowing you got back safely.”

“Thank you. Do you mind if I use your restroom first?”

“Not at all. It’s over there,” he said, pointing across the room. I hurried over and shut the door, pulling out my phone.

Me: Heading to the hotel. Or at least I think I am.

Jason: What happened?

Me: I’ll tell you later. Right now he wants to take me home. Are you close?

Jason: In the parking deck. I’ll see you when you get off the elevator.

After putting my phone away, I flushed the toilet and washed my hands before opening the door. “I’m ready to go.”