Midnight Sun (Twilight #1.5)(86)

"I wasn't doubting you," Bella said, but she was looking at the book sadly.

"What's the matter?" Jacob asked.

"I was just wondering if... that man... if someone got hurt... now, while we're reading this book," Bella said.

"I don't know what to do about that," Jacob said. "I mean even if we do tell someone... it's not like we really know anything that would help catch him."

"I know," Bella frowned, even more down than she was before, but she picked up the book and started to read again.

"The coverage here in town will be light. It's too far away to be considered of local interest," Alice told me. "It was a good call to have Carlisle take him out of state."

I nodded. Bella didn't watch much TV regardless, and I'd never seen her father watching anything besides sports channels.

"That's so true," Jacob said, laughing harder than was necessary in hope that Bella would loosen up some.

I'd done what I could. This monster no longer hunted, and I was not a murderer.

Not recently, anyway. I'd been right to trust Carlisle, as much as I still wished the monster had not gotten off quite so easily. I caught myself hoping he would be extradited to Texas, where the death penalty was so popular...

"You'll get no arguments here," Jacob stated.

No. That didn't matter. I would put this behind me, and concentrate on what was most important.

I'd left Bella's room less than an hour ago. I was already aching to see her again.

"Alice, do you mind - "

She cut me off. "Rosalie will drive. She'll act pissed, but you know she'll enjoy the excuse to show off her car." Alice trilled a laugh.

Jacob rolled his eyes, though it was hard for him not to chuckle at that.

I grinned at her. "See you at school."

Alice sighed, and my grin became a grimace.

I know, I know, she thought. Not yet. I'll wait until you're ready for Bella to know me. You should know, though, this isn't just me being selfish. Bella's going to like me, too.

"Well of course I am," Bella said.

"I have to admit, she's not half bad," Jacob shrugged.

I didn't answer her as I hurried out the door. That was a different way of viewing the situation. Would Bella want to know Alice? To have a vampire for a girlfriend?

"Yes," Bella answered.

Knowing Bella...that idea probably wouldn't bother her in the slightest.

Bella rolled her eyes; he just had to make it sound negative that she felt that way. Jacob, on the other hand, was laughing at her expression.

I frowned to myself. What Bella wanted and what was best for Bella were two very separate things.

"No... what Bella wanted and what you think is best for Bella are two very separate things," Jacob said and Bella nodded her head in total agreement.

I started to feel uneasy as I parked my car in Bella's driveway. The human adage said that things looked different in the morning - that things changed when you slept on them. Would I look different to Bella in the weak light of a foggy day? More sinister or less sinister than I had in the blackness of night? Had the truth sunk in while she slept?

"Er... she's known the truth for like four days or something... I'm sure it's all sunk in," Jacob said.

"Yeah, but it was just confirmed today," Bella said.

"Do you think you'll be scared of him?" Jacob questioned and Bella rolled her eyes. "I rest my case."

Would she finally be afraid?

Her dreams had been peaceful, though, last night. When she'd spoken my name, time and time again, she'd smiled. More than once she'd murmured a plea for me to stay.

Would that mean nothing today?

I waited nervously, listening to the sounds of her inside the house - the fast, stumbling footsteps on the stairs, the sharp rip of a foil wrapper, the contents of the refrigerator crashing against each other when the door slammed. It sounded like she was in a hurry. Anxious to get to school? The thought made me smile, hopeful again.

I looked at the clock. I supposed that - taking in account the velocity her decrepit truck must limit her to - she was running a little late.

"You don't have to make fun of my truck," Bella muttered causing Jacob to laugh.

Bella rushed out of the house, her book bag sliding off her shoulder, her hair coiled into a messy twist that was already coming apart on the nape of her neck. The thick green sweater she wore was not enough to keep her thin shoulders from hunching against the cold fog.

The long sweater was too big for her, unflattering. It masked her slender figure, turning all her delicate curves and soft lines into a shapeless jumble. I appreciated this almost as much as I wished that she had worn something more like the soft blue blouse she'd worn last night...the fabric had clung to her skin in such an appealing way, cut low enough to reveal the mesmerizing way her collar bones curled away from the hollow beneath her throat. The blue had flowed like water along the subtle shape of her body...

Bella was blushing; did she always have to read the chapters where he described her like this?

It was better - essential - that I kept my thoughts far, far away from that shape, so I was grateful to the unbecoming sweater she wore.

"Well, thanks," Bella groaned.

I couldn't afford to make mistakes, and it would be a monumental mistake to dwell on the strange hungers that thoughts of her lips...her skin...her body...were shaking loose inside of me. Hungers that had evaded me for a hundred years. But I could not allow myself to think of touching her, because that was impossible.