Midnight Sun (Twilight #1.5)(194)

My head snapped up. Coma? ... Coma? What?

I reached for Bella's hand, bringing it to my lips, kissing her lightly, caressing her face. Automatically I began to try and probe her mind, even though I knew the effort was useless. Maybe I could reach into her brain, pull out her thoughts. Did she forgive me? Was she okay? How was the pain?

Silence.

Fear bubbled like acid in my stomach. The only thing that slightly soothed my frenzied nerves was her warmth...her pulse in the air, on my skin.

I was seeing double, watching Bella from two different views, mine and Alice's.

How revolting. She didn't care much for the blood being forced into Bella's veins either.

We both continued to watch Bella's check's lightly turn a tinge of pink as the blood swirled under her clear skin. Every second the pain at her broken body lashed at me. I tried to form some kind of enchantment, to make it so we could magically change places; that I could feel the pain, that it was me lying there unconscious.

To think how this could have happened, how she was almost reduced to ash...to a cold and fiery death. The picture of a fleshless Bella entered my mind and the feeling of disgust was present on my tongue. Each second I felt like I was becoming emotional deranged. I needed an outlet, some way to focus my thoughts.

Clunk. Clunk. Clunk.

I whipped around to see Alice flipping a tiny video in her hands. Resentment began bubbling to the surface. Without thinking I rounded on her.

"What happened? How did you let this happen? Bella..." my voice was overly accusatory.

My hostility began swelling in the air, slowly consuming me. Alice stepped back two steps before sitting down. She placed her head in her tiny hands and very quiet sobs escaped her lips. The afternoon's events were finally catching up to her.

"After you boarded the plane...I saw it. Bella, in the ballet studio. I saw it all..."

She looked up at me as her eyes sparkled with unshed tears, tears that would never come.

"I...I didn't realize it was because she planned to meet him."

"You left her alone with Jasper? Seriously...Jasper? Come on Alice!" I kept my voice low, not wanting to upset anyone outside this room.

"Jasper can handle himself," she cut across me. "Maybe she hadn't completely made up her mind, but when she did, she was already on her feet, running towards the exit. By the time this future presented itself to me I knew I'd be too late." She breathed in a quick breath, trying to calm her nerves. "She wrote a letter to her mom. It was still in my hand. On a hunch I opened it. That's when I very nearly ran into you. Edward... I'm...I'm so sorry."

"Not as sorry as I am," I barely muttered.

My anger had left as quickly as it had come on.

Sorry...

"It's not your fault, it's mine." I whispered.

I turned to bring myself back to Bella. My eyes followed every bruise, every bump and every blackened spot. Each second little quiet explosions of pain were erupting through my body. Now, more than ever, I was vividly aware of her fragile, breakable body.

How is this your fault? Alice challenged.

"If it wasn't for me, she would never be in this hospital. She would be safely in Forks, probably having a nice dinner with her father. Instead...she's here, broken...comatose."

Her arm wrapped around my shoulder. "No, this is his fault." She waved the tape in front of me. "Do you want to see what Bella was talking about?"

I looked at Bella and then looked at Alice, giving her a pleading look.

"Carlisle," Alice called over her shoulder.

"Excuse me, Dr. Jones." Carlisle said politely.

"Yes, of course. I'll check on Ms. Swan later," Dr. Jones responded.

Carlisle strode into the room. "Alice?"

"Carlisle, will you please stay with Bella while Edward and I watch this tape?"

He looked over her to see my face. I wasn't looking, my face was resolutely focused on Bella, my focal point, the one I cherished, loved and adored above all others. No, I wasn't leaving this room.

"You guys go ahead," I waved them away.

Alice huffed lightly. "I'll watch it outside the hospital." You can just watch it through my mind.

"Okay," I answered blandly.

They both left me, not another thought in their minds about my decision. Carlisle had already known that I wouldn't leave her side. Not now, not when she needed me more than ever. Fear fluttered in my chest at the thought of what she might think when she does wake. Would this be the thing that finally makes her snap? Another sharp stab of pain prickled my insides.

Bella continued to lay there, silent and still...unmoving except her tiny chest movements.

There was a light rapt on the door before the Doctor walked in with his clipboard in hand. I rose, hand out.

"I'm Edward Cullen. Thank you for taking care of her." I spoke reverently, more thankful than he will ever know or understand.

Love. "Yes, of course. You're welcome. Dr. Cullen wanted me to stop in and explain what will happen with her next."

"Yes..." I pressed.

Eager chap, isn't he? "She has many injuries. Her skull is fractured, she has several broken ribs and her leg was badly mangled, but we were able to fix that with surgery. A few pins will hold her bone in place until it heals," he answered while taking her vitals.