Illuminae (The Illuminae Files #1)(43)
Zhang, B: just trying to demonstrate concern. am told that’s what it looks like
Zhang, B: u seriously as frosty as u sound?
ByteMe: i’m shitting myself, idiot
ByteMe: tired hungry hungry tired not getting anywhere
Zhang, B: eat?
ByteMe: i’m holed up. step outside, might not get back in to keep working. chaos here.
Zhang, B: i hear u. even by my low standards, my hygiene is slipping. the service here is really unacceptable. i should complain to management
ByteMe: u ok over there? i saw the report from the bridge, when they took u.
Zhang, B: always okay, K. feeling mighty. we’re going to work this out. Getting delirious from tired, reckon that might be just the thing to help me see what to do.
ByteMe: they don’t get it, do they?
Zhang, B: course not. most of the ppl jockeying consoles over here now never dealt with AIDAN direct. One of the team leaders used to clean the food vending machines. I shit you not.
ByteMe: working this out is like watching one of Ezra’s geeball games. i get that there are rules, but every time i think i have them pinned down, someone calls a penalty that makes no f*cking sense at all.
ByteMe: so if we can work it out and write a rulebook, we get to control AIDAN and live. If we make a mistake in there anywhere, then we don’t control it when it wakes up.
Zhang, B: and then it’s game over
ByteMe: their AI is insane. don’t they get that? it took hits at Kerenza, they asked too much of it, it went mad
Zhang, B: oh my god
ByteMe: ?
Zhang, B: OH MY GOD.
ByteMe: ????????????????????
Zhang, B: THAT IS WHAT WE DO
Zhang, B: we ask too much of it. of the Lincoln. we do to it what got done to AIDAN. we send it mad.
ByteMe: keep talking
Zhang, B: listen, we can’t win a direct confrontation with the Lincoln. not happening. what we need to do is damage them somehow, slow them down enough we can run for it.
Zhang, B: we target their drive systems, that’s the easiest way in. their engines. we screw their operating software so bad, they have to shut down completely and reboot. that gives us the time we need to run. restart like that takes forever when u don’t have an AI
ByteMe: with you so far. how do we get to their engines from here tho?
Zhang, B: the engines are coming to us, getting closer every hour. we have our pilots deliver it. right into their sensor array. Right where the sun doesn’t shine
ByteMe: deliver what exactly? tell me what you want, I’ll help.
Zhang, B: logic bomb
ByteMe: is that even a thing?
Zhang, B: it is now. we’re going to be f*cking famous.
Zhang, B: WE WILL BE HEROES
ByteMe: slow down there. before you strap on ur superhero cape, tell me what a logic bomb is
Zhang, B: drive systems aren’t sophisticated computing, most of the software on a BT dreadnought isn’t bleeding edge. they don’t have an AIDAN. u and i code processor-intensive queries for the CPU that look legit but ultimately have no way to resolve.
ByteMe: and if we have the tasks self-replicate, it’ll just be layer after layer after layer of queries it can’t find an answer to
ByteMe: so, infinite loop until the drive computers crash
Zhang, B: genius
ByteMe: i hate to validate u this way, but genius
Zhang, B: we’ll have to turn AIDAN on to transmit it
ByteMe: when they get here we’ll have to turn AIDAN on anyway or we’ll have no defense grid
Zhang, B: at least this way we’ve got something we can really throw at them
Zhang, B: they revoked lover boy’s flight status, right?
ByteMe: yeah why?
Zhang, B: the pilots can buy us time if they have to, but they’ll need to get real close to the Lincoln to hit the sensor arrays and plant this thing. Gonna be a lot of warlocks between them and the goal line
ByteMe: he’s decked. He’s safe. let’s get to work
Zhang, B: i’m going to need more stims
ByteMe: those things will kill u, u know
Zhang, B: anyone ever suggest you go into comedy?
ByteMe: surprisingly, no
Mason, E, LT 2nd: i was just thinking
ByteMe: <insert joke here>
Mason, E, LT 2nd: ok
Mason, E, LT 2nd: how about “i wondered what that noise was”?
ByteMe: i feel like I’ve used all the good ones over the years. I’ll give it some thought and get back to you with a good takedown
ByteMe: u okay over there?
Mason, E, LT 2nd: yeah. just thinking
ByteMe: do you plan to share with the class, second lieutenant Mason?
Mason, E, LT 2nd: wuz thinking about the 1st time i kissed u
ByteMe: u should be thinking about the next time you’re going to. when we get out of this.
Mason, E, LT 2nd: 1st time i walked you home after all those games you came to
Mason, E, LT 2nd: goddamn you looked beautiful
ByteMe: … are you defective?
ByteMe: u walked me home approximately one zillion times before you kissed me.
ByteMe: and I can back that figure with Science
Mason, E, LT 2nd: science?
ByteMe: I was counting
Mason, E, LT 2nd: ahhhh
Mason, E, LT 2nd: no
Mason, E, LT 2nd: i meant the 1st time i kissed u in my head
ByteMe: … wut?