Forbidden Falls (Virgin River #9)(40)

When Ellie rented her small room over Jo’s garage, the last thing she expected was to make a new friend. Her plan had been to be an invisible tenant—she knew Jo was nervous about her being on the property and she thought she knew why. Nick Fitch could be a problem for his wife; he had a reputation. And Ellie did not want to be part of the problem.

However, Jo invited her to lunch, then invited her again and again, and Nick was never around for these lunches that were dedicated to women-talk. In a little over a week of lunches, Ellie felt closer to Jo than she had to a woman friend since her grandmother’s passing. But when Jo pressed her for details about how this ex-husband, this stepfather, could gain temporary custody, Ellie fibbed. “I don’t have much,” she said. “I just don’t have the means Arnie has. I rented a small place in a so-so neighborhood while Arnie has a house in a nice neighborhood. Plus, I worked nights in a bar while Arnie’s trump card was being principal of an elementary school. I sure wish I knew how he managed that job—he’s not patient with kids at all.” She so hoped Jo wouldn’t hate her when she learned the truth, which she inevitably would. Ellie just wasn’t ready to reveal it yet, though she already felt great affection and trust for Jo.

“The bastard,” Jo said. “Where you work has nothing to do with the kind of mother you are.”

“Well, it worked for Arnie,” Ellie said with a nod. “But I think we’re doing all right at the moment, the kids and me. He’s letting them talk to me on the phone every night and I haven’t had another problem on the Saturday visits. He always gets in my face a little bit, but I never let him see me sweat. I did tell him a small lie, though. I wanted him to think he was being watched, so I said that I’d told the court where I was working and that I’d have letters from real upstanding, proper people saying I’m a good person and decent mother.”

“Oh, my darling,” Jo said, running her fingers across Ellie’s hand. “And you will! We’ll all write letters for you, if that’s what it takes.”

Ellie laughed. “Jo, I don’t know many people. I’ve been scrubbing, painting, hauling trash and answering the phone.”

“Is working with Noah going well?”

“It’s okay. Sometimes he’s a pain in the butt, but he’s fair and even funny. It’s busy every minute, especially when he’s away from the church, which is a lot of the time lately. I run from cleaning or painting to the office to grab the phone, back and forth. There have been a lot of hang-ups, by the way. I don’t know what to make of that.”

“Your ex, possibly?” she asked. “Checking to see if you really work at the church?”

Ellie shrugged. “I suppose it could be. But wouldn’t one call do it? Maybe it’s that nurse from Valley Hospital who’s chasing my boss.”

“Oh?” Jo said. “Do tell?”

They talked for a while about the nurse, about the fact that Noah was a pretty good-looking guy, and then moved on to discuss about everything from the price of gas to the fact that soon the leaves would be changing color as August aged and September loomed on the horizon.

“Ellie, do you think I could meet the kids sometime?” Jo asked.

“Really? You want to?”

“I would love to,” she said. “I mean, if you’d share your time. I don’t want to impose—I know you don’t get them often. But, let’s see—Saturday. The weather’s cooling. We could bake! We could make cookies and decorate them. We could color and finger paint. We could—”

“Jo! You don’t have kids! You don’t have all that kid stuff!”

Jo smiled patiently. “Just tell me which Saturday. I’ll be ready.”

Ellie was silent for a while. “Can I ask something personal?”

“You can ask me anything, Ellie.”

“Why didn’t you have children? You and Mr. Fitch?”

“Nature’s mystery,” she said with a shrug. “We were both healthy and normal, but I didn’t conceive.”

“Did you consider adoption?”

And that’s when Jo dropped her chin, and her gaze. “Nick wouldn’t hear of it. He said if he wasn’t having a baby of his own he wouldn’t have someone else’s, not knowing where it came from.” And then she lifted her gaze and met Ellie’s. Just that little piece of information changed Jo’s eyes and Ellie knew there was so much more to the story.

Ellie frowned and shook her head. “But adoption isn’t that mysterious or secretive. Oh, there might be one or two hidden things, but that’s a risk even when you have your own—that some little-known relative, or someone generations back contributed something you weren’t even aware of yourself.”

“I know,” she said. “But that was the end of it as far as he was concerned.”

“I’m sorry,” Ellie said softly. “Both of mine were total accidents. And it hasn’t been easy—but maybe I’m the lucky one. Of course, I have no husband, no father for them, no partner…”

“Nick made that decision a long time ago,” Jo said. “Things haven’t been the same between us since.”

“Oh, Jo,” Ellie said. “Oh, the son of a—”

“It was me,” she said. And then she was quiet.