Following Me(72)

“I think I’d rather stay. I could use a drink.”

Fuck! No. No. No. He could not have a drink. Bad idea. Really bad idea. Brennan was over by the drinks.

“Take one of my tables, and I’ll go get you one,” she said, her voice struggling to remain calm. “Crown, right?”

“Don’t worry about it, Dev,” he said, walking up to her. “I’ll just go to the bar. We can talk after you get off work.”

“Okay,” she whispered, knowing it was anything but okay.

He reached forward and squeezed her hand. “You look good,” he said, raking his eyes over her body. Then, he released her, turned, and walked directly toward the bar, toward Brennan.

Her heart deflated, and air burst out of her mouth in a whoosh. She reached out, grabbed one of the booths, and held on for dear life. She couldn’t even turn around to look at Brennan and Reid standing at the bar together while Brennan made Reid a drink, offered up polite conversation, and joked around. She couldn’t witness it. She thought she might throw up.

It took everything she had to return to her tables and act like nothing was wrong. She had never worked so hard in her life. She was trying so desperately not to look at Brennan and Reid that she worked twice as hard as normal. She needed to keep her mind busy, and that was the only way she knew how.

Devon didn’t know what she was going to do when her shift ended. She had been running for so long that she had completely pushed away thoughts of when she would have to face her life again. Now, it was here, sitting right in front of her.

The after-hours crowd started filling the room, which made the distraction a bit easier. She still had a hard time looking over to see Reid sitting at the bar, but at least, Brennan was busy enough that he didn’t have to talk to Reid. She didn’t want them to ever have to talk.

When Hannah and another waitress walked in to take over for Amy and her, Devon thought she might break down into tears. She couldn’t leave. Jenn’s was a sanctuary, and her demons were waiting for her outside the door…or even worse, at the bar, drinking with Brennan. She knew that Reid wouldn’t do anything in public. He was too self-controlled for that. It was the only reason he had gotten away with everything for this long. She hadn’t ratted him out, and no one would guess that perfect Reid would ever do something like hurt his perfect girlfriend.

She wanted to believe that their time apart had showed him how much he had missed her and how wrong his actions had been. She wanted him to see her for the woman he had fallen in love with. She wanted him to apologize and beg her to come back.

But those were fairy-tale dreams. When he had walked in, the look Reid had given her had been enough to show her that none of those things would be her reality. This was Reid after all. He could never be wrong…ever.

“Hey, Devon,” Hannah said, walking up to her.

“Hey, Hannah.”

“I wish I had the mid-shift this week,” she said with a sigh. “But I’m stuck working late. What are you doing tonight?”

Devon stared at her blankly. Hannah never made polite conversation with her.

“Um…nothing.”

“Sounds riveting,” Hannah said, straight-faced.

That’s more like it, she thought.

“Well, have a good time,” Devon said, untying her apron. “I’m out of here.”

“Lucky,” Hannah said under her breath.

If only she knew…

Devon bit her lip and stole a glance at the bar. Both Reid and Brennan were looking directly at her. She averted her eyes as quickly as she could and hurried through the swinging door into the kitchen. Her heart was pounding as she walked stiffly into the break room.

Only a couple hours ago, she had sat here with Brennan while he played with her hair. Before that, they had been kissing, and he had her backed up against the lockers. Could everything that had happened since then be real?

She grabbed her purse and slung it over her head, letting the strap cross her body. She leaned forward against her locker and tried some breathing exercises to calm her racing heart. Tears sprang to her eyes, and her hands swatted them away. They wouldn’t help her now. She just needed to be strong.

The door opened behind her, and she hoped it was Amy.

“Belle, you okay?” Brennan asked.

No luck.

She straightened immediately. “I’m fine,” she said, the words sounding hollow. Why did that word sound so horrible when she said it?

“Fine. Alright. Are you ready to head out then? Kami just walked in to take my spot,” he said, walking across the room.

He knew something was different. She could tell by the set of his shoulders. He was waiting for it. She didn’t think he knew what it was, but he knew to get ready. He was preparing himself for whatever was to come.

“Brennan,” she said softly. God, she hated herself.

“So…you’re not fine.”

“I…I don’t know,” she said with a shrug.

His hand reached out to touch her, but it fell halfway through, like he thought better of it.

“Does this have something to do with that guy out there?”

“What guy?” she said, barely audible.

He looked at her pointedly.

“Yeah, it does.”

“I figured as much.”

“I wasn’t expecting him to show up here,” Devon told him. She wondered if he could tell how scared she was or if her fake bravery was enough to sway him away.