Death Wish (Alexa O'Brien, Huntress #5)(68)

“Let’s get out of here. A walk by the river with a bottle of cheap wine sounds about perfect right now.” For an angel Willow was a pretty wild guy.

It had been ages since I walked in the river valley. The river divided the south side of the city from the rest. We descended the stairway leading us down, away from downtown to the quiet beauty of the river.

Willow popped the cork on the cheap sparkling wine, taking a long swallow before passing it. Producing a pack of cigarettes, he lit one up and took a long drag. I held up a hand in refusal when he offered it to me. I couldn’t help but laugh. Willow was a heck of a guy.

“Alright, now spill it,” I said when we were seated on top of a picnic table, staring out at the dark river. “Tell me how an angel falls.”

He was silent for so long that I thought it was his refusal. Lighting another cigarette, he let out a plume of smoke and fixed his gaze on the water. “There are so many ways. Many reasons why. My sin? I fell in love with a whore.”

Like Falon, Willow didn’t give off an energy vibe I could easily feel when his power wasn’t in active use. But, seeing the pain in his eyes, he didn’t have to. I swallowed the bubbly wine; it tasted faintly of strawberry. I could say nothing that would be an appropriate response, so I respectfully waited for him to continue.

“Christina was special. She had a heart of gold, as they say. In the end, she’d been more concerned about my fall from grace than her own well-being. She wasn’t just a woman who slept with men for money. She was a lost soul able to still find hope in every sunrise who believed people were better than they were ever given credit for.” He paused, and I pushed the bottle into his hand. His lips twitched in a half smile of thanks. “I knew what I was risking by letting myself get involved with her. But, it was love. That love cost Christina her life.”

“I’m sorry, Willow. I can’t imagine what you’ve been through.” Now it was my turn to regard him with sympathy. An angel forbidden to love a human. How tragic. But, I knew well that there is no choice in love. We are all its slaves.

“I just wanted to save her. Instead, I condemned us both.” Willow tossed his cigarette butt and reached to light another. “That was a year ago. And now, I’m just another fallen angel with grey wings and blood on his hands.”

I accepted the last of the wine, wondering how the heck we’d polished it off so fast. My head was spinning. I’d had more than enough, but I drained the bottle anyway.

“Silver,” I said, having to put more effort into the one word than I should have. I was so going to regret this come hangover time.

“Excuse me?” Willow raised a brow.

“Your wings. They’re silver. And beautiful.”

“And you’re slurring like a first class wino,” he chuckled, “but thank you.”

An easy silence settled over us. We stared out at the bright city lights on the opposite shore as they sparkled against the night sky. More than a few times, they bled together as my vision swam. I needed to sleep it off, but I couldn’t tear myself away.

Dawn was two hours away yet. It was nice, sitting there inside the illusion of a quiet, beautiful night. But, illusion it was; the visual of Shaz and Bianca drifted up from the depths of my memories where I’d shoved it. I felt ill. Booze and betrayal don’t mix well.

“Can you forgive him?”

“I don’t know.” A chilly breeze rolled in off the water. I shivered, certain it wasn’t merely from the cold. “I’m not sure I can I ever look at him again and not see what I saw tonight.”

Willow nodded in understanding. He gave me a studious look again, head tilted as if he were choosing his words carefully.

“I know how painful it is. The woman I loved slept with men for money. A lot of them. Even now, I don’t understand how she could do it. But, I know one thing: she loved only me. Not them.” His hand was warm against mine as he patted it gently. “Does he love her?”

I bit my lip and closed my eyes. My chest tightened painfully. “I don’t know. He might.”

“You already know the answer. Deep down, you know. So, does he love her?”

I opened my eyes to find him staring at me expectantly. He was right. I did know.

“No. He doesn’t love her.” Saying it didn’t make me feel any better. Knowing it changed nothing.

“Then you have a choice to make.” Willow offered me an encouraging smile. “But first, go home and get a good sleep. You look like you need it.”

Before we parted ways a few blocks from The Wicked Kiss, Willow extended an open invitation to contact him any time I needed a friend or just a gut-punching drink.

“A friendly warning, Alexa,” he gestured to the dragon on my arm. “Demons and angels have clearly cut lines and rules they have to follow. But, some fall in between. Fallen angels, vampires, shifters and so on, they are shades of grey, able to bend rules and command parts of both worlds. It’s why Shya does what he does. He needs those shades of grey. Watch out for him. And, don’t hesitate to get in touch if you need to.”

“I’m not sure how I could ever return the favor.” I was touched by both his warning and his offer. “But, if I can ever do anything…”

“I’ll let you know.”

I was in no shape to drive. I also wasn’t up to telling Arys about my night. Not yet. I needed some time alone. Since I had no home to call my own, I was left with little choice. I’d stay in Harley’s old room at The Wicked Kiss.