A Wild Ride (Jessica Brodie Diaries #3)(57)

I climbed in as he did, not breaking the silence as we drove to the bar. He held the door to the bar open for me and let his hand fall to the small of my back, leading me toward the booth where everyone was.

In silence.

When we got there I said hi to everyone and climbed in. William climbed in on the other side.

In silence.

What was going on in that head of his? Did he realize he was freaking me out?

I leaned toward Ty, who happened to be sitting next to me. It was a good place to start.

“Hey Ty?” I asked quietly.

He leaned closer, realizing my desire for secrecy.

“Is there something up with William? Have you noticed anything? He seems off. Is there something wrong that no one is telling me? I’m getting a little worried.”

Ty’s easy, usually open expression turned guarded. “You know that guy better than I do.” He turned toward the table. “Consequently,” Ty said loud enough for the whole table to hear, “what color is your teddy tonight?”

I felt my face turn bright red. I looked around the bar to make sure no one else had heard. “It is just a bra and panty set, not a teddy, and it is pink, okay?”

Everyone started laughing and shaking their heads. William was looking at me with smoldering eyes.

Why had Ty turned away so quickly? He liked to joke, sure, but it wasn’t like him to ignore something serious when it was brought up. Especially about William in the current circumstances. It didn’t add up.

William hadn’t been like this at home. This had started tonight. This silent strangeness was new. He was definitely keeping something, and it started at bull practice with these guys.

I thought I might ask Adam. He was a shit liar. So, later in the night, when I was looking at the juke box, thinking about calling it a night, I got my opportunity when the big lummox snuck up behind me.

“Jessie.”

I jumped about two feet. “Christ Adam! Warn a girl, would ya?”

He chuckled and stepped to the side of me. “You were in your own world. Thought I might see what yer at. I heard you weren’t going to San Francisco after all.”

“We’ll go when William is better.”

“Oh, right.” He nodded, leaning against the wall.

“Hey Adam, have you noticed anything off with William? He’s not really acting himself, you know? Is there some medical thing no one is telling me?”

“Medical thing? Nope. He’s on the mend, far as I know.”

That rang true, but Adam was getting slightly jumpy, which meant he was avoiding something—thank you, Lump, for revealing that tell.

“Oh, well is there something else, then? Some reason why he’s a little off?”

“Hmm, uh, how so? No, I don’t know. He’s under a lot of pressure, so that must be it. He’s fine. Doing fine, I mean. Getting better.”

Shivers crept up my back. “You’d tell me, right? If something was wrong?”

Adam straightened up, wanting to get away. “’Course. But wouldn’t have to—you know him best.”

A girl always thought she knew her man best. Right up until she got a nasty surprise. I didn’t think he planned to break up with me, not when every third look held overflowing love, but there was definitely something. An emotion festering. One he was trying to keep from me.

It was a quiet ride home that night. I wanted to ask, but didn’t know how to breach the subject. Instead, I worried. I ate at my lip until we were under the covers, then let him hold me tight, hoping whatever it was, it would emerge like a sliver working its way out of skin.

The next week passed in a rush. I questioned everyone on William’s odd behavior, and got back largely the same answers as Ty gave me: I’d know best, wouldn’t I? But no, he was on the mend, they thought. He seemed fine, er, better. I mean…why?

One thought had occurred to me. He hadn’t brought up marriage since before the accident. That wasn’t like him. He would usually be more concerned with it now, scared I’d be penniless and alone if he was gone. Which was stupid, of course. I didn’t need his money before, I certainly didn’t need it now with the great job I had. But his lack of bringing it up was strange.

Especially because I knew I would say “yes” if he asked. Without hesitation, I wanted him for life. I wanted to face my future battles with him by my side. And yes, I wanted to have kids with him. But kids could definitely wait a couple years—I wasn’t ready for that part of the future. Marriage was no longer a big deal when you were so sure about your partner it might as well have been etched in blood.

Him not bringing it up, though, made me wonder. He wouldn’t want to ask unless he were sure I’d say yes, but he would never know unless he asked. I was fighting a desperate fear that he’d changed his mind. That he gave in to my previous aversions to something as serious and long-term as marriage.

Didn’t he know I was as fickle as they came?

Finally, I went to the advice center.

Gladis was sitting in the yard, enjoying a book and a glass of lemonade. She sat peacefully, the light breeze ruffling the large brim of her hat. Older, though, too. The hip issue and her years were starting to wear on her. I hated seeing it.

Pushing that horrible thought from my head, I sat in the chair opposite her on the grass. “Hey Gladis.”

Startled, she looked up. “Oh, Jessica. I didn’t hear you creep up.” Her face lit in a smile. “How are ya, dear?”