he: A Novel(21)

And if the camera cannot help but magnify her failings, so also does it capture the hardness beneath.

At the first screening, he casts glances at Mae as she watches the screen. Mae does not see what he sees. Mae is enthralled by the figure she presents. Mae is in love with the possibility of herself. Mae could have a future in pictures, but not the one she imagines, not the one she believes is her due. Mae could be background, furniture, but Mae will never be a star.

Afterward they celebrate with champagne, and he cannot meet her eye.

Motion Picture News compares him to Chaplin. His performance is described as ‘exquisite’, and it is. He has never been better.

Now Broncho Billy Anderson must try to reason with him about Mae.

Broncho Billy Anderson must try mistakes in life. Broncho Billy Anderson accidentally buys a theater with more curses than a mummy’s tomb, and therefore understands folly, so Broncho Billy Anderson knows that Mae is going to ruin this man. Mae has so much baggage, she ought to be followed by mules.

Metro thinks Mae was miscast, Broncho Billy Anderson tells him.

It pains Broncho Billy Anderson to say this, because Broncho Billy Anderson can see the hurt it causes. This man before him does not complain. This man before him works day and night. This man before him is cheerful and kind and polite. This man before him has greatness inside.

But this man before him is not making enough money to satisfy Metro, and the return bookings are not repaying Broncho Billy Anderson’s investment. Meanwhile, Mae believes she’s Mabel Normand. Broncho Billy Anderson starts to fear that Mae could represent the next phase of the Curse of the Bambino.

Mae can’t play the lead, Broncho Billy Anderson persists. She’s good for character parts. Character parts she can do. But that’s all.

– Mae won’t take character parts. Character parts are for old people.

Mae is old, Broncho Billy Anderson wants to tell him. If you’re a woman in this business, you’re old at thirty and dead at thirty-five. Mae is thirty-four. In career terms, someone should be measuring her for a coffin.

But Broncho Billy Anderson is too kind to say this aloud.

This man before him will not listen. This man before him recognizes the truth – Broncho Billy Anderson is no fool, but neither is he – yet some combination of love, loyalty, and fear prevents him from doing what is required.

Broncho Billy Anderson makes another film with him, a burlesque of When Knighthood Was in Flower, but this one does worse business than Mud and Sand. In his heart, Broncho Billy Anderson still believes. In his heart, Broncho Billy Anderson would like to continue believing, but his wallet tells Broncho Billy Anderson to stop.

There are no hard feelings. Broncho Billy Anderson loves this man, and has achieved what he can for him. Broncho Billy Anderson has made Mud and Sand, and Broncho Billy Anderson has brought him to the attention of Hal Roach once again.

Broncho Billy Anderson has helped turn him into a star.





42


It is not the same studio to which he returns. When first he worked for Hal Roach, he did so outdoors, on a single primitive stage. At night he helped to carry the furniture inside in case of bad weather. But Snub Pollard and Jimmy Parrott and Harold Lloyd have made Hal Roach wealthy. The Hal E. Roach Studios now sit on nineteen acres in Culver City, and Hal Roach has investors willing and eager to back his pictures.

The lot reminds him of the Selig Zoo Studios. He can hear the howling of monkeys and the shrieking of birds, because Hal Roach keeps a collection of animals for use in his pictures.

There was an act on the vaudeville circuit called Rhinelander’s Pigs. The pigs stank out any theater in which they played. No one wanted to follow Rhinelander’s Pigs. The pigs toyed with a ball, balanced on a seesaw, formed a pyramid. Any time the pigs appeared reluctant to perform, Rhinelander would take out a long knife to sharpen on a whetstone, which was the cue for the pigs to do whatever it was they were supposed to be doing. Eventually, he supposes, the pigs, through age or the vagaries of public taste, outlived their usefulness, at which point they were taken to the slaughterhouse, where another man stood, sharpening a knife on a whetstone.

He wonders if the pigs tried to perform tricks before they died, in the belief that it might save them.

Rumor has it that one of the ostriches in Hal Roach’s zoo is the same bird that put Billie Ritchie in the grave.

Billie Ritchie worked with Fred Karno. Billie Ritchie’s gags involved tramps and drunks.

Chaplin was watching Billie Ritchie very carefully.

Anyway, the ostrich kicked Billie Ritchie so hard and so often that Billie Ritchie got cancer and died. This is how hard the ostrich kicked Billie Ritchie. The fate of Billie Ritchie concerns him, because one of the pictures Hal Roach has lined up for his slate is called Roughest Africa, and features more animals than the Bronx Zoo. One scene is set to involve him being chased across Santa Catalina Island by an ostrich.

He initiates some inquiries, and is told that this ostrich is not the same one that kicked cancer into Billie Ritchie.

That, he is assured, was another ostrich entirely.

Jimmy Parrott makes one-reel pictures for Hal Roach under the name Paul Parrott, while Jimmy’s brother, Charley Parrott, directs Snub Pollard comedies and acts as director general of the studios. Charley Parrott is also taking care of a new series for Hal Roach, to be called Our Gang.

He knows of Charley Parrott from the vaudeville circuit, but Jimmy Parrott is familiar to him only from the screen. Studio gossip has it that Jimmy Parrott was a hard kid in his teens, and ran with a street gang in Baltimore. Charley Parrott saved his brother by bringing him out to California and giving him work. It was not entirely an act of charity. Jimmy Parrott is a good comedian. Not original, not like Harold Lloyd, but solid. Charley Parrott guides Jimmy Parrott. Charley Parrott’s instincts are better than solid. And Charley Parrott can act. Charley Parrott is subtle. He watches Charley Parrott going through set-ups and lines with his cast and thinks that Charley Parrott should be in front of the camera, not behind it.