he: A Novel(18)

Babe lies, or permits his lawyers to lie for him. Perhaps Madelyn does the same, but still, he does not like to think of Babe as a liar. Together, Babe and Madelyn put to the torch any memories of happiness they might once have enjoyed, and sow the seeds of troubles to come.

Babe’s allegations prevail. To compound Madelyn’s abasement, a restraining order is obtained against her, because Madelyn is not a star. Madelyn is just a former piano player and singer. Babe Hardy is in pictures, and must be protected.

And waiting in the wings (but how long has she been waiting? This, too, is one of Babe’s secrets) is Myrtle Reeves, soon to be the second Mrs. Oliver N. Hardy. Babe is rooming with Myrtle and her sister. Everything is above board. Nothing to see here.

Madelyn is no fool. The name Myrtle Reeves is already on her lips, and passes in a whisper to the ears of her lawyer. Madelyn counter-sues, and is granted an interlocutory decree.

A sham, Babe later tells him, but Babe will not meet his eyes.

Madelyn gets her $30 a week, but does not ask for alimony. This, he thinks, says much about her.

He does not inquire who got to keep the dog and the Capuchin monkey.

One year later, with the ink still wet on the final decree, there is another wedding, and another press cutting:



Vitagraph, safeguarding its investment in Babe, does its job.

Babe and Myrtle are childhood sweethearts back in Atlanta.

Babe sends Myrtle her first Valentine when she is ten years old (and Babe is fifteen, if this is to be believed).

Babe and Myrtle wed after Babe has paid court to her ‘for some time’.

This, at least, is true.

Of Madelyn, there is no mention. She has been bought off so that Babe may rest easy in the arms of his new bride, his life story rewritten. Now Babe will never have to think of Madelyn again.

If Babe believes this, Babe is a fool.





37


Broncho Billy Anderson is a handsome man with a name to match. The name is not his own, but in Hollywood Broncho Billy Anderson is not unique in this regard. Broncho Billy Anderson’s reputation rests on westerns, and Broncho Billy Anderson is a better cowboy name than Max Aronson. The West may have enjoyed its share of Jewish cowboys, but no one has yet figured out how to make money from them.

Broncho Billy Anderson plays not one, not two, but three roles in Edwin Porter’s The Great Train Robbery, the first real western. After that, Broncho Billy Anderson becomes a western star, the first motion picture cowboy. As a director, Broncho Billy Anderson also films the first pie-in-the-face gag. Broncho Billy Anderson is a man of many firsts.

Broncho Billy Anderson makes hundreds of pictures, taking his crew on the Western Pacific Railroad through Niles Canyon week after week. Acting, directing, editing.

Broncho Billy’s Last Spree.

Broncho Billy’s Christmas Dinner.

Broncho Billy’s Adventure.

Broncho Billy and the Schoolmistress.

Broncho Billy’s Pal.

Broncho Billy’s Cowardly Brother.

Broncho Billy for Sheriff.

In 1915 alone, Broncho Billy Anderson releases more than thirty Broncho Billy westerns. After a while, even Broncho Billy Anderson gets tired of Broncho Billy, so Broncho Billy Anderson departs for New York to become a theater impresario. Unfortunately, Broncho Billy Anderson buys the Longacre Theater. The Longacre Theater is cursed because the man who built it, Harry Frazee, also owns the Boston Red Sox. Harry Frazee is responsible for selling Babe Ruth’s contract to the Yankees, so his theater shares the Curse of the Bambino.

Broncho Billy Anderson gives up, and returns to California to produce motion pictures.

In later years, at the Oceana Apartments, he will be asked about the many people who have helped him along the way. Whenever he can, he gives credit to Broncho Billy Anderson, because Broncho Billy Anderson performs two great favors for him, two acts that change his life forever.

The first is that Broncho Billy Anderson believes in him.

The second is that Broncho Billy Anderson introduces him to Babe.





38


At the Oceana Apartments, he lives in a three-room box. A television sits in the corner of the living room, and on it stands his honorary Oscar. He receives it in 1961 for his ‘creative pioneering in the field of comedy’. Danny Kaye presents the award.

By then, Babe has been dead for four years.

He does not attend the ceremony. He pleads illness, although this is only partly true. He cannot take to the stage without Babe.

On the wall by his desk is a framed photograph of Babe and him together. It is one of his favorites. Along with the Oscar, it is the only indication that he has ever been in show business.

That he was formerly in pictures.

Sometimes he is embarrassed at his decision to situate the Oscar so prominently. He fears ostentation. He does not wish to be thought of as boastful.

Ida tells him not to be so silly. Babe would have displayed his Oscar, Ida says.

This is beyond dispute. Babe would have delighted in it.

Here is the truth, he thinks: Babe would have thrived without him, but he could not have thrived without Babe. Babe gave him his identity. Babe offered him purpose.

The apartment is silent. Ida is taking a constitutional. It is at these times that he talks to Babe. He comes up with gags, bits of business. He explains them to Babe, detailing how they should be performed, listening, cogitating the response, adjusting, finessing.