When I Was Yours(78)

“No.” I turn in Adam’s arms, and he wraps them around me. I sob in his shirt.

Adam holds me tight, not saying a word. What could he say that would make this right?

Casey is going to die.

I’m going to lose my sister.

I curl my fingers into Adam’s shirt, clinging to him.

How can I go from being so happy to feeling the worst I have ever felt in my life?

This is worse than when Mom died because Casey is still here. She’s so young, and we’re going to have to watch her die.

I feel my dad’s presence behind me.

His hand touches my back. “Evie.”

Adam releases me, and I turn to my dad. He’s not crying. He’s being strong. But I can see in his eyes that it’s killing him.

I fall into his arms. “We can’t just let her die.” I cry. “We have to do something.”

“If I could do something, baby, I would. I swear to you.”

I blink up at him. “How…long?”

“Maybe four months at the most.” Tears fill his eyes this time.

“Then, there’s still time. We can find someway to save her. Maybe a new drug will come on the market.” I can feel hope trying to fight in me.

Dad’s eyes flicker to Adam behind me. Then, his hand comes to the back of my head, tilting my eyes to his. “It might. Hold on to that hope, and so will I. We’ll keep praying that something happens to save her.”

I stay in Dad’s arms for a long time. Adam goes to the kitchen and starts to make coffee.

I just want to be with my sister right now, so I leave my dad and Adam.

I walk down the hall to Casey’s room and quietly open her door.

She’s lying on her bed, facing the window. She looks so tiny there.

She is tiny and so young.

She deserves to have a life, a long life.

We lost Mom. Haven’t we lost enough without losing Casey, too?

Kicking off my shoes, I climb onto the bed behind her and put my arm around her.

She turns her head, looking back at me. “Hey,” she says.

I bite my lip to stop from crying, blinking the tears away. I need to be strong for her. “Hey.”

“Dad talked to you?”

“He did.”

She lets out a slow breath and blinks up at the ceiling. “I…don’t feel ready to die yet, Evie. I know Mom’s up in heaven, and I want to see her, but I don’t want to leave you and Dad.”

My heart cracks wide open.

I rub the tears from my eyes. “You’re not going to die,” I tell her. “Mom won’t let it happen. She loves you, but she doesn’t want you up in heaven with her. That’ll mean she has to start picking up after you again.” I smile at her, trying ease things a little.

Casey laughs softly. Her little giggle reminds me of when she was a baby, and I used to sit for hours with her, making her laugh. The memory hurts. It hurts so badly.

She curls her hand around mine, and I feel her tiny fingers hook onto my ring.

I freeze.

She lifts my hand and examines it. Then, she looks at me, her eyes wide. “You got married?”

I feel sick. I’m the worst person in the world.

Casey shouldn’t have found this out right now. I should have taken my ring off. Adam and I left our rings on because the plan was to come in and tell Dad and Casey straight away. But, of course, that didn’t happen.

“Yes,” I answer slowly.

“Holy cannoli!” She turns over to face me. “I can’t believe you got married!”

I give an uneasy smile.

“Was it in a church?”

I shake my head. “Vegas.”

“Vegas! Oh my God!” She giggles. “Does Dad know?”

“No, and we don’t need to talk about this right now. You’re more important.”

“No freaking way. We are so talking about this. And you say Dad doesn’t know? Is Adam out there right now with Dad?”

“Yes…”

“And does he have his wedding ring on?”

Shit.

“Mmhmm.”

“Then, Dad knows. He might not have spotted it right away, but I’m guessing he had other things on his mind then. Give him another five minutes, and he’ll know.”

Fuck.

But as I stare at Casey’s face, my worry evaporates. I touch my hand to her face. “You’re smiling,” I say.

“Sure I am. Dad is going to blow a gasket when he finds out that you and Adam just got married in Vegas. And that means, for a short while, we don’t have to think or talk about what’s happening with me.”

“Oh, Case.” My eyes instantly fill with tears, and I wrap my arms around her, pulling her to me.

“Just so you know, I’m a little annoyed that I didn’t get to be a bridesmaid,” she says muffled against my shoulder. “But I am happy for you.”

I hug her tighter. “We’ll have another service, maybe on the beach, and then you can be a bridesmaid. How does that sound?”

She tilts her head back, resting it on the pillow, she smiles at me. “It sounds perfect.”

As I lie here with my arms around Casey, staring into her beautiful face, I tell myself that I will make that a reality. She will be my bridesmaid. Because there isn’t anything I wouldn’t do to save her. I will find a way to save my sister.