The Relationship Pact(65)

2!

1!

“Auld Lang Syne” plays over the entertainment system as everyone toots horns and shakes noisemakers.

Hollis grabs my face in his hands and kisses me.

It starts soft and sweet but gets deeper and harder as the seconds sweep by. My knees go weak from the taste of his mouth—cake mixed with beer mixed with Hollis—and the happiness at having him here.

And having him happy.

He pulls back, panting, and laughs. “Happy New Year, baby.”

I bite my lip and try not to show him how affected I am by him. “Happy New Year, Hollis.”

Colored confetti falls onto our head and Hollis wipes a piece off of my eyelashes. “You are something, you know that?”

“I’ve heard that before.”

He laughs as Boone walks by shouting, “Happy New Year!”

Hollis starts to say something else when my aunt Siggy’s traditional first song of the year starts to play. The harps and flutes float happily through the entire house and probably the yard because Aunt Siggy lives and dies by setting the year with this anthem.

“Want to get some champagne?” I ask.

His eyes dart around the room. I look to see what he’s looking at, but nothing looks amiss.

“The food will be changing to breakfast-y stuff soon, so if you want anymore pizza, we should grab … it now …” My voice trails off. “Hollis?”

His shoulders are stiff, his eyes a muddied mix of expressions.

“What song is this?” he asks, gripping the back of his neck with his hand. “I can barely hear it.”

“Oh this?” I laugh. “This is Aunt Siggy’s New Year’s theme song. She says it’s to remind everyone of their dreams and to wish on stars and … all that jazz. It’s the creative in her.”

He nods and looks around, clearly uneasy.

“Hey,” I say, touching his shoulder. “Are you okay?”

He nods again. It’s accompanied by a forced swallow. “I need to get some air. Okay?”

“Yeah,” I stammer, confused. “Want me to come with you?”

“No. I’ll be back.”

He all but storms out of the dining room and disappears in the mix.

My back hits the wall as I try to figure out what in the hell just happened.

Siggy comes up to me. Her smile slides off her face as she takes me in.

“Hey, Riss. You okay?”

“I think so?” It comes out more like a question than an answer, but it’s the best that I can give her. “Something just happened with Hollis, and I don’t know what it was.”

She looks around. “Where’d he go?”

I shrug.

“Give him a few minutes. Holidays can be a roller coaster for some people.” She kisses my cheek. “Happy New Year, my favorite niece.”

“Happy New Year, Aunt Siggy.”

She tosses me a wink and moves to a circle of her friends.

I stand in place with the knot that’s twisting so tight in my stomach that it pains me to breathe. Something is wrong. I know it.

Tears prickle the corners of my eyes as I replay the emotion in his from just a few minutes ago. Was it fear? Anger? Sadness? I don’t know.

And that kills me.

I slip through the house, looking for him. I avoid every set of eyes and every attempt at conversation. Once I’m sure he’s not inside, I walk to the front porch.

The lawn is dark unless you’re under the twinkling lights, so if he’s out there, I’ll never find him.

I venture down the tunnel. When I come to the other end, I see him sitting inside his car.

The engine is off, and the heat from his breath has fogged up the windows a little bit. His head hangs, and I wonder if he’s texting someone or just dazing off.

He doesn’t look up as I walk toward him. He doesn’t look up at all until I lift my door handle. His head jerks up, and he looks surprised to see me.

“Hey,” I say, climbing inside. The air is cold, and I shiver. “Are you okay?”

The happiness in his eyes from earlier is gone. It’s replaced with a heavy dose of dark and hard and desolate.

I don’t know how he carries all of that around.

My heart breaks for the beautiful man in front of me.

“I’m not feeling great. I think that shrimp didn’t sit well with me,” he says. “I can leave my car here, and I’ll call an Uber.”

“What?”

“I want to go, but I know that you—”

“Hey.” I touch him on his arm. His gaze falls to my hand. “If you’re leaving, I’m leaving.”

“You don’t have to do that.”

I smile softly. “I know. But we came together, and we leave together. Besides,” I say, trying to make him laugh, “having you in the car to myself is my favorite time to interrogate you.”

He almost grins. “You’re a pain in the ass.”

“I know.” I wink at him. “Let’s go.”

I reach back and grab my seat belt.

“Don’t you need to go in and tell them goodbye?” He looks toward the house. “They’ll miss you.”

“They can text me.” I lean across the console and press a kiss on his cheek. “Now get this car started because I’m freezing.”