Select (Select #1)(91)
“You really think you can get into Stanford?” he teased.
“I don’t know. I may need to try Berkeley. Maybe we need a bridge between us,” I joked. He had been so worried I’d regret my decision, especially once I came back to this house. I could see he was relieved that I was so purely happy.
“So, California.” John said, and began to kiss my ear. I obliged him by turning my head to the side, giving him better access, so in love.
“California.” I said it like it was a foregone conclusion. “But it’s not because of her. I’ve gone this long without knowing her.”
John stopped kissing me and I opened my eyes, not liking the interruption, not wanting to talk about her. He had an expression I’d never seen on his face before. It was an expression I’d only seen on Novak’s. As if he were trying to tune into a faraway frequency.
“Julia?”
“What?” He was scaring me.
“That was crazy.” He shook his head like he was coming out of it.
“Tell me.” I took a step back.
“Nothing. I’m fine now. I just had this crazy, vivid daydream.”
“What did you see?”
“No, it’s…I just saw this incredible underground world. I felt like I was there. God, where did that come from?” He rubbed his face with his hands. “Sorry. I’m so tired, I think I fell asleep standing up.”
He shook his head and looked at me, beginning to laugh at himself. I watched his smile fade. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
Carefully, I reset my features. “It’s nothing.” The lie came easily—I wanted to believe it so badly. I reached out to John, pulling him towards me. “It’s nothing at all.”
Thank you, Amanda Eyre Ward. Without you, this book would not exist. Thank you for helping me tell this story.
I am so grateful to my agent, the lovely Kerry Sparks, for ushering Select out into the world and holding my hand every step of the way. I also feel an enormous amount of gratitude to Shelby Boyer for her time spent shepherding this project.
My deepest appreciation to Charlesbridge and to my editor, Monica Perez. Thank you, Monica, for your enthusiasm, insights, and thoughtful guidance.
Many thanks to early readers Sophy Hagey, Debbie Dunn, Vivian Raksakulthai, Debby Wolfinsohn, Nancy McDonald, and Megan Frederick. Also, thank you to Elizabeth Kramer, Leigh Sebastian, Eddie Kaye, Dini Snow, Susan Hewlitt, Maureen Carlson, Andrea Dunlop, May Cobb, Jenny Holt, and Sookie Rothenberg.
Thank you to my sister, Kjersti McCormick, and my mother and father, Kathleen and David Weisenberg, for listening and being so supportive over the years.
Astrid and Margot, I owe you so many thank yous for the patience you had while living with this book and for somehow staying excited and sweet.
And most of all, thank you to my husband, Jeff Gothard. You are the most capable person I know. Thank you for your kindness and willingness to be right there for me with support, ideas, and constant feedback. This book has your stamp on it in so many ways. I am so grateful for you.