Only Child(79)

“Stop crying,” I said out loud to myself.

“Stop crying, I said!” I said, and it was like one part of me was talking to a different part of me. “Stop, stop, STOP.”

I washed my face again and went back in my room, and then I stood there in the middle of my room and thought about what I should do.

“You have to do something,” I said to my other part. “Everything is getting worse.”

“OK, but what can I do about it?” the other part of me answered, but not out loud, just in my head. I thought about it for a long time, and I didn’t move and I didn’t sit down. I just kept standing there in the middle of my room, thinking about it.





[ 46 ]


    Urgent Mission


    Is it time to go on another mission?” said Annie.

“Indeed,” said Kathleen.

“And it is quite urgent now,” said Teddy.

“Merlin is failing quickly,” said Kathleen. She blinked back tears.

“Oh, no!” said Annie.

“Morgan wants you to find the final secret of happiness today,” said Teddy.



Today was the day when Jack and Annie are going to look for the fourth secret of happiness for Merlin. Their two friends, Kathleen and Teddy, they are sorcerers, show up in the Magic Tree House and give them their mission from Morgan, who is like their teacher—the Magic Tree House belongs to her.

And today was the day when I was going on my mission, too. All morning my stomach was doing the roller-coaster thing like crazy, and my legs were so twitchy I had to move them all the time. I tried to sit still on my bed with Clancy on my lap, and I tried to read Magic Tree House #40, Eve of the Emperor Penguin, so I could think about Jack and Annie’s adventure and not mine.

Every time I thought about my mission I started to feel scared, and then I had to do the thing again where the one part of me talks to the other part: “Stop being scared. Time for the mission. Time to be brave. Remember?”

It wasn’t time for my mission yet, but almost. I tried to read, but I kept thinking about other stuff. All the time I had to go back to the top of the page and read it all over, and then I still didn’t remember what I just got done reading.

My plan was ready, my supplies were ready, but it wasn’t time to go yet. The perfect time was going to be later after lunch, when Mommy was having her lawyer meeting, because then Mommy wasn’t going to notice and I could get a head start.

My mission was to go to the cemetery where Andy’s grave was. And Charlie’s son’s grave. The man from the news said that every day in the evening Charlie goes there to visit his son’s grave. So I was going to the cemetery, too, and I was going to wait there for Charlie to come. I had to go to the cemetery, because I didn’t know where his house is or what his phone number is.

I wanted to talk to him to say sorry about how Mommy was talking about him. I wanted to ask him to come back to my house with me so we could talk to Mommy together and then all the fighting could be over and then maybe Daddy could come back home.

Getting ready to go on a mission was a lot of work—I was working on it this whole morning and I kept thinking about other things I had to bring with me. For Jack and Annie, it’s easy. All they have to do is point to a book and say, “I wish we could go there!” and BAM! they end up exactly where they were supposed to go. Also they don’t have to worry about packing for their trip because they’re already magically wearing what they will need. In Eve of the Emperor Penguin, they end up in Antarctica and they are wearing snow pants and gloves and goggles. And Jack’s backpack changes into a hiker’s backpack.

I wished I could find a book about the cemetery and say “I wish I could go there,” and then just show up there with all the supplies I was going to need. But that wasn’t happening. I had to make the plan on my own and pack my stuff on my own and then go there all by myself.

That was the part that was making my stomach do all the flips and making my legs all twitchy, when I thought about how I had to sneak out so Mommy wasn’t going to notice, and then get to the cemetery all by myself. I knew the way because it was right by my old preschool and I went that way a thousand times. But I never walked there even though it’s close, only like five minutes in the car, and Mommy always said we should really walk there instead of drive, but then we never did because we’re always in a rush in the mornings.

I decided to put Magic Tree House #40, Eve of the Emperor Penguin, in my backpack, because sitting still and reading wasn’t working out anyway, and I only read like three chapters this whole time, but I wanted to bring it for later. I pulled out the backpack from under the bed and it was very heavy because earlier I tied Andy’s sleeping bag to it at the bottom with a suitcase strap. The book was the last thing that was going to fit in the backpack because it was so full.

I thought about my plan again in my head, and that’s when I remembered the thing about the alarm box. Last night, when I was thinking about sneaking out, I thought about the alarm box and that when I was leaving the house, when Mommy had her meeting, the robot lady voice was going to say “Front door!” and then Mommy was going to know that I opened the front door. And by the way, I couldn’t go out the front door anyway because the news vans and the news people were going to see me. So I came up with a cool plan, and I almost forgot to do the most important part.