Limitless Love (Lotus House #4)(68)

I grinned. “I do like your mommy very much. In fact, I love your mommy. And you know what?”

Her dark-blue eyes flashed to mine. “What?” There was awe in her tone, as if I was about to impart a big secret to her.

“I love you too.” I tapped her nose.

She smiled huge. “Good. Then you’re my daddy. Great. I’ll tell my friends. Oh!” Her eyes widened to the size of tennis balls. “I’ll tell my teacher too and PowPow and Mimi. Great. Just great.”

My gut twisted painfully. “No, baby, I’m not your daddy…yet,” I added because I couldn’t not.

Her nose crinkled up in the way that I knew she was not happy.

“But you said you love Mommy and you love me. Then you can be my daddy.” There literally was no gray area for a five-year-old. None at all.

I was pretty sure I physically felt my heart rip in two knowing that without even trying, I was going to hurt this little girl. I never wanted to hurt her. Ever. I wished more than anything I could be everything she wanted, but I couldn’t make those promises. I had a good idea where things were leading with Monet, and right now, between the two of us, we were awesome. Still, we had to deal with Kyle; we had to have some peace to be a couple and some time being a family of three that was not tainted by the threat of someone trying to hurt either of my girls. It did not, however, change that an ache filled my chest, wanting more right this second but knowing I had to wait. We all did.

“One day, sweetie, I’d like nothing more than to call you my own, but for now we need to take our time. If your mom and I get married, then I can officially adopt you.”

“A-bop me?” she repeated.

“Ah-dop-t you.” I sounded out the syllables and exaggerated the t so she could hear the variance.

“’S’wat I said. A-bopt me.”

I inhaled full and deep and hovered over my girl with my forearms on each side of her little body and brought my face close to hers. “Sweetie, let’s focus on being happy today, okay? We’ll worry about the rest another time.”

Her response was to wrap her tiny arms around my neck and plaster her forehead to mine. She smelled of that baby-wash stuff and lotion her mom put on her after her bath, with a hint of jasmine just like her mother. I closed my eyes, content to be embraced by an amazing child. It was a new feeling, something I hoped I’d never get used to.

“I love you, King Clay.” She squeezed my neck, kissed my cheek, and then let go.

“I love you too, Queen Lily.” I kissed her forehead. “You gonna stay in bed all night this time? You’ve got the super cool new salt rock lamp light we got you. And see that white thing there?”

She nodded.

“That’s a monitor. We will hear and be able to see you while you sleep, and Mommy and King Clay will be checking on you regularly. Okay?”

She glanced at the monitor, then the salt rock lamp that glowed a soft orangey yellow throughout the room. Our little love was not willing to sleep in the dark after the attempted breakin, and we wouldn’t make her.

“Also, you can see that your window now has a super big lock.” I pointed to the new lock we’d installed. And this stick?” I pulled it out of the window track so she could see. “There is no way anything can fit through that window unless you personally remove it yourself. And the best ever is this super-secret magical covering. Nothing is getting through this magic wall.” I dragged down the blackout blind we’d installed.

Monet felt if we put in new window coverings, mentally, her little mind would block out some of the fear of the window. Reiterating the extra locks were in place and showing her the monitor would hopefully ease any additional fears.

“What do you think?”

She snuggled into her bed, her eyes getting drowsy.

“I like magical walls.”

Of course she did. And she believed they were real and they’d protect her. Monet was a freaking genius. Another reason to show my appreciation to my woman tonight.

Once more, I tucked Lily in and kissed her forehead. Her eyes were closed and her breath was already evening out as I stood above her. Resilient little girl. Just like her mother.

Closing Lily’s door just enough to leave a crack of light from the hallway, I made my way into the kitchen. Monet was finishing up the dishes from dinner. I cooked, she cleaned. If she cooked, I cleaned. We’d only been living with one another for a little while, but we’d happily found our own system with the nightly duties. On the nights that I did the chores, she put Lily to bed. Over the past couple weeks, much to our dismay, that had been in our bed.

“She down?” Her voice was calm yet concerned.

“Yeah, beautiful. You’ll never believe what she asked me, though. I almost called out for a life raft.”

Monet cocked a hip against the island, picked up her half-full glass of red wine and took a sip. A drop of wine sat like a pomegranate seed right on her bottom lip. Before I could move, she licked the drop away. I grunted but stayed strong, picking up my own glass of wine and crossing my arms.

“Really? What was it about?”

I took a sip of wine, allowing its flavors to roll across my taste buds while I thought how to broach the sensitive subject for the second time. “She asked if I was her daddy now.”

Monet’s eyes grew to twice their size. “She didn’t.”