Klara and the Sun(72)
‘I wish him the very best. All I’m saying is that there are all kinds of ways to lead a successful life.’
Many faces had been pushing in around me, but now a new one appeared in front of the others and kept moving closer till it was almost touching mine. Only then did I recognize Rick and let out a sound of surprise.
‘Klara, do you know what’s up with Josie?’ he asked. ‘Did something happen earlier?’
‘I don’t know what was said between Josie and the Mother,’ I said. ‘But I have very good news. The task that was given to me, that evening you helped me reach Mr McBain’s barn. It’s now been completed. It was a task I so wished to complete, but for a long time I couldn’t see how to do so. Rick, it’s really been done.’
‘That’s wonderful. But I’m not sure I know what you’re talking about.’
‘I can’t explain yet. And I was obliged to give up something. But that doesn’t matter at all, because now we can have hope again.’
Ever more cones and cylinders – or what appeared to be fragments of them – were squeezing into any spaces left around me. I then realized one of these fragments – a shape moving in to replace Rick – was in fact Josie. Once I’d recognized her, she became immediately more distinct, and I had no further difficulty holding her in my mind.
‘Hey, Klara, this here’s Cindy. She was waitressing our table earlier? She knows about your old store.’
There was a touch on my arm and I heard someone exclaim: ‘Hey, I used to love your store!’ When I turned towards the voice, I saw two tall funnels, one inserted into the other, the upper one tilting slightly forward towards me. When I smiled and said, ‘How do you do?’ the funnels went on:
‘I was telling your owner here. I walked past it last weekend and it’s become this furniture place? Hey, you know, I’m sure I saw you in that window once.’
‘Klara wants to know where they moved to. Cindy, do you know?’
‘Oh. I’m not sure if they moved…’
Someone was tugging my arm, but before me now were so many fragments they appeared like a solid wall. I’d also started to suspect that many of these shapes weren’t really even three-dimensional, but had been sketched onto flat surfaces using clever shading techniques to give the illusion of roundness and depth. I then realized that the figure now beside me, leading me away, was the Mother. She was saying, almost into my ear:
‘Klara, I know we said a lot of things earlier. In the car, I mean. But you have to understand, I was thinking about three, four things at once. All I’m saying is don’t take too seriously anything we said. You understand, right?’
‘You mean, when we were in the car alone? When we were parked near the bridge?’
‘Yes, that’s what I mean. I’m not saying we’re going back on anything. But I’m just saying so you know, okay? Oh, this whole thing’s getting so confusing. And Paul doesn’t help. Look at him. What’s he telling her now?’
Not far from us, the Father was leaning forward so that his face was close to Josie’s, saying something earnestly.
‘He’s so full of shit these days,’ the Mother said, and began to go to them. But before she could do so, an arm came out of the crowd and grasped her wrist.
‘Chrissie,’ Miss Helen’s voice said, ‘leave them alone for another minute. They don’t get to be together much these days.’
‘Paul’s distributed his brand of wisdom quite enough for one day, it seems to me,’ the Mother said. ‘And now look. They’re quarreling.’
‘They’re not quarreling, Chrissie. I assure you they’re not. So let them talk to each other.’
‘Helen, I really don’t need you to interpret for me. I can still read my own daughter and husband.’
‘Ex-husband, Chrissie. And exes are unfathomable, as I’m having underlined this very moment. Vance swore he’d not keep us waiting, and now look. We weren’t married, as you and Paul were, so the bitter aftertaste has a different flavor. But don’t underestimate it, Chrissie. I haven’t seen him in fourteen years, and then only fleetingly quite by chance. Is it possible we passed each other in this crowd and didn’t recognize one another?’
‘Do you regret it, Helen?’ the Mother asked suddenly. ‘You know what I mean. Do you regret it? Not going ahead with Rick?’
For a moment Miss Helen kept looking towards where the Father and Josie were talking to one another. Then she said: ‘Yes. If I’m honest, Chrissie, the answer’s yes. Even after seeing what it’s brought you. I feel…I feel I didn’t do my best for him. I feel I didn’t even think it through, the way you and Paul did. I was somewhere else in my mind and I just let the moment go past. Perhaps that’s what I regret more than anything else. That I never loved him enough to make a proper decision one way or the other.’
‘It’s okay.’ The Mother placed a gentle hand on Miss Helen’s upper arm. ‘It’s okay. It’s difficult, I know that.’
‘But I’m doing my best now. I’m doing my best for him this time round. I just need Former Lover to turn up. Oh! That’s him there. Vance! Vance! Excuse me…’
‘Would you care to sign our petition?’ The man who had appeared in front of the Mother had a white-painted face and black hair. The Mother took a quick step back, as if the white-face material would come off on her, and said: ‘What’s it about?’