In a Book Club Far Away(39)

“What did you expect me to say?”

She felt a mix of confusion, then some empathy because she had been speechless herself a couple of days ago. And then came shame, as if this was only her doing. As if she’d engineered this pregnancy to raise the stakes in their marriage.

“I… I don’t know, except it wasn’t this.” Her voice shook. Having a baby, making a baby, was not a one-person endeavor.

Regina’s fear from the grocery store returned. It rose like a tide in her psyche, coming from deep inside her. Up to this point, she’d done everything she could so she would have choices in her life. What if she and Logan were going to be like her parents had been, forced into staying together for the sake of a child?

You’re not your mother. These were Sophie’s words to her. Her friend had spoken with sureness, and just as that statement had convinced her then, Regina, in recalling it, believed it now.

She gathered her courage. “Logan, if you’re not ready for this… because I am, and I intend to be the best mother this child could have.”

“Whoa,” Logan said. “Regina. Don’t get this wrong. At all. Babe, I’m just in shock.” His eyes rounded in fright. His Adam’s apple bobbed, his sign of insecurity. “I’m… scared, too. But it doesn’t mean that I’m not with you on this.” And as if reading her mind, he said, “I know what you’re thinking right now.”

Logan indeed knew exactly what she was thinking, so she gave words to it, intending on making it clear. “My father left us, Logan. He left us for an entirely different family, and I don’t want that to happen here. I want us to be honest with each other.”

After seconds of silence, her husband spoke. “This is our baby. Yours and mine. I will love this baby as much as I love you.”

Regina felt tears well behind her eyelids. She nodded, her anger subsiding. She had to remember that she’d had over forty-eight hours to process this news. That in the beginning she was shocked herself. “I love you.”

His eyes softened, and a soft smile graced his face. “I’m going to be a dad. You’re going to be a mom.”

“Yes, yes. We’re going to be parents.” Regina’s face warmed, and her body sagged with relief. This was the Logan she fell in love with.

“We have a lot to discuss. About our plans, together. How can we raise a child if we’re both on active duty? But how can we do it without the both of us working? Babies are expensive.”

She nodded. “I was thinking the same thing. But we have time to talk about it.”

“You’re right. Yes, we do.” He held up a hand and pressed his palm up against the screen, and she did the same, not quite lining up with his. She shut her eyes, hoping to feel his comfort through the image.

They were in for a long road.





PART FOUR




Whatever the problem, be part of the solution. Don’t just sit around raising questions and pointing out obstacles.

—Bossypants by Tina Fey





CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

Sophie




Present Day, Sunday

Two mornings later, Sophie leaned back against the leather chair and pulled on the wooden handle. Her legs jerked upward, and she sighed at the instant relief. It had been a long night; she had forgotten what it was like to have a toddler in the house. Babies had their sixth senses, too, and no bribe could get Genevieve to settle the last couple of nights, not in the playpen next to her mother, and especially not in the crib. Regina, who had been sleeping in Genevieve’s room, had not been able to sleep, either, and soon, Sophie and Regina ended up sharing the poster bed, with Genevieve somewhat asleep between them.

The arrangement wasn’t ideal, especially since their blowup the other day had erected a tougher barrier between them. But they did what they had to do for sleep and sanity.

Sophie’s phone buzzed in the chair’s cupholder, startling her. Jasper’s name appeared on the screen.

Haven’t heard from you. Check in?



She debated on how to respond and if she even should. Jasper would simply insist that she return home now that Adelaide was on the mend, in her second day of recovery. That Sophie mustn’t subject herself to her and Regina’s former drama.

As if her partner had read her mind, another text flew in:

Hope Regina’s on her best behavior.



Instead of answering the text, Sophie opened her new-to-her copy of Waiting to Exhale. She intended to stay in Alexandria as long as she needed to, and he would have to accept it. So she focused her attention on the previously loved book, pages yellowed and dog-eared, with pencil markings in some corners.

It was ridiculous for her to be reading a classic when she had an entire Kindle app full of books, many of which had been published in the last year. Heck, she had her current book club book—she’d found and joined a neighborhood book club in the subdivision they had moved into—yet to read. Dominicana by Angie Cruz promised to be a page-turner.

And yet, here she was. Surely, Waiting to Exhale no longer held the same kind of meaning and emotion almost three decades after it was written. But she would read the book in the name of friendship—with Adelaide, of course. Not with Regina. Sophie prided herself on not going back on her word, and she wouldn’t start now. At the end of the week, whenever Adelaide wanted “book club” to occur, Sophie would be ready.