Gods & Monsters(85)

“Come back here, Pixie. You’re mine, you hear me? You’re fucking mine and if you think for a single second that you can get away from me, you’re out of your mind. I won’t let you.”

I put a trembling hand on my tummy and Blu notices. Her eyes flare in understanding but I shake my head. “Don’t say anything. Don’t tell him. Please.”

She nods as she squeezes my shoulder and keeps walking. “Don’t worry. Your secret’s safe with me.”

I can’t tell Abel. I can’t tell him that his wish already came true. He has already had his revenge. I can’t do that to my baby — a baby I’m not even sure I’m carrying. But if I am, my child will never bear the sins of his father. I won’t let it happen.

I won’t let Abel’s anger touch him or her.

Just when Blu’s about to turn into the hallway, I pause. I stare at my husband. He’s being held back by two men but he’s basically bulging out of their hold, his determination to come after me is so strong. He’s panting, growling, his eyes are wild, his hair’s messy. He’s both a man and an animal right now. A true god. He makes his own way, his own rules. He loves me with every inch of his savage heart. I do too.

I mouth I’m sorry, like the way I did on prom night three months ago.

We only lasted such a short time in New York. Back in our town, you couldn’t have separated us even if your life depended on it.

When did we go from being two crazy kids in love to this? To whatever this is.

Shaking my head, I turn and walk away.

In my wake, my husband shouts my name over and over. It’s loud, tortured. It’s a howl. It’s the big bang.

And I can’t help but think that maybe this is how hearts die and all love stories come to an end.





My Pixie is gone.

She walked away from me, crying, her beautiful face splotched and red, the loose strands of her hair sticking to her wet cheeks.

I’ve had nightmares about this. About waking up one day and finding her gone because I’m not worth it. I’m not worth all the trouble, the years of sneaking around, running away from the only place she’s ever known, being estranged from her parents. I’m not worth all that.

I’ve had nightmares about her finally realizing that whatever her parents have been saying all along, whatever her town has been saying, is true. Abel Adams is a monster and he doesn’t deserve the love of the town’s princess. A goddess.

But fuck that. She’s mine. I took her and she’s going to stay with me. I won’t let her get away.

No matter what Nick says. She doesn’t need space. Not from me, her husband.

“You guys need to calm down, okay, man? It was a huge fight. You both need some time. Blu’s gonna look after her, so let’s get you home so you can relax and get some perspective.” He thumps my back. “Take the night off and when she’s back in the morning, you guys can talk.”

They stay with me all night, Nick and Ethan. They snatch away my phone so I can’t call her, won’t leave me alone for a single second. Those fuckers. I would knock them out, but it wouldn’t matter. Ethan would duck and run away, and it wouldn’t faze Nick. Nothing fazes that guy.

I pace and growl like I did the night they locked me up back in that town. At least then I had the pain to distract me from drowning in thoughts of Pixie. Tonight, I don’t have the luxury. I keep seeing her face when she told me I’d lost all control. Well, fuck yeah, I’ve lost control. I’ve had no control over my actions, over myself ever since I saw her.

I don’t understand how it all came about. One second she was kissing me and the next, she wanted me to go away. It’s not her choice. She’s my wife. She married me and she’s stuck with me for life. Even if she wasn’t married to me, I still wouldn’t let her get away from me.

Sometime during the night, I make the mistake of drifting off. I wake up gasping for breath because I see Pixie leaving me to go back to her parents. I haven’t had that kind of reaction in years now. Like someone’s strangling my throat, pressing on my windpipe, keeping me from drawing a breath.

Abel means breath, my mom used to tell me when I was a kid.

When they died, I couldn’t breathe right for days. Not until I saw Pixie and all my thoughts became hers. My nightmares went away and I dreamed about her pink dress and her flying hair and dirty toes. I wondered if there was a way I could touch her. If I could find out whether she was real or something I made up in my head out of grief and loneliness.

She was real, though. So real and pretty, sitting on the church pew, under the window, talking to her friend. Her voice was sweet. Like sugar or something. I wanted to dip my finger in it and pop it in my mouth for a taste.

Half asleep, I search the apartment for Pixie — not that it’s a huge place — but I come up empty. Where the fuck is she? Nick is gone now to go to the airport because Blu and him are leaving for LA in a little while. Pixie should be back by now. Obviously, she can’t stay at their place.

Ethan has woken up from my loud feet and I throw him a glare. In exchange, he throws me my phone. Good boy. While pacing the living room, I dial Pixie’s number, but it goes straight to voicemail, making me growl.

“Pixie, pick up the phone. Where the fuck are you? Do you have any idea how worried I am? You’re driving me fucking crazy right now.” I pinch the bridge of my nose. “Just pick up the phone, all right? You can’t shut me out. You can’t leave me hanging like this. I…”