Gaslight (Crossbreed #4)(121)

Niko sat down, straddling the roof as if he were a jockey in a horserace. “I bet it’s a nice view from up here,” he said, squinting toward the sunset.

“Can you see it?”

“Sun is made up of more energy than you can imagine, so it’s uncomfortable to look at.”

“I wish I could describe the colors, but I don’t think you’d understand.”

“Sometimes I feel the same way about what I see.”

I tugged one of the thin braids mixed in with his straight hair. “I missed you. Anything new to report?”

He turned around so we were facing the same direction. “We located Temple’s home. I handled all the calls to the local authorities in Greenland. That’s where the ship was heading for its final destination. Temple has a home out there where he collects younglings like some people collect horses. He trained them and got them past the bloodlust phase to get the highest price from some of his affluent contacts who live there and across the globe.”

“He deserves to die for keeping them prisoner.”

Niko kept his hands at his sides, gripping the shingles beneath him. “On the contrary, none of the fourteen women were being held against their will. Though that doesn’t mean they weren’t prisoners.”

“They might as well have been. Where were they supposed to escape to? It’s Greenland.”

“A clever man can make someone a prisoner in their own mind. He needn’t use chains or walls to hold them. Loyalty crafted from fear will eventually turn on you, but manipulating someone’s mind to believe they have reason to trust you is what makes that person devout.”

“Sounds like a cult leader.”

“The characteristics are similar.” Niko rubbed his smooth chin and looked toward me. The wind kicked up some of his long hair, which blew across his face. “Your light is different.”

“What do you mean?”

“Not your emotions, but your natural light. I noticed pulses of ruby red and silver when you came through the door. Now that I see it again, it’s still the same. People’s light rarely changes unless something permanently changes you. I expected it after you returned from Fletcher’s captivity, but it was still the same. I suppose your having been through that torment before had something to do with it. Did anything significant happen on this trip?”

Only Christian, but was I really so different? It concerned me that Niko had picked up on something.

“I guess Viktor might have told you that I killed three men. We almost got arrested, so maybe that’s it.”

His eyes slanted up, secrets stirring behind their icy depths. “Perhaps. Something has made an indelible mark upon you, whether you realize it or not. I’m going to have to relearn you.”

The sun was gone in seconds, but the light remained.

“What’ll happen to all those women?” I asked.

“It’s not our job to know what happens to every person we arrest or save. It’s up to the authorities. If they can’t be rehabilitated, the authorities will have no choice but to put them down. It’s the humane thing to do. A rogue Vampire is too dangerous to let loose upon society. We can’t unmake what they are.”

“So they kill them? Why not erase their memories?”

“It’s complicated when you have willing victims. The elders don’t like people like that in the selection process to begin with. They become tools in our world if they fall into the wrong hands. It’s possible the authorities might pair them with Vampires who will mentor them, but finding honorable men willing to devote their time to a youngling isn’t easy.”

“At least the one we rescued will have a better shot at a normal life—as normal as life can be for a Vampire.”

“Normal is subjective.”

I draped my arms over my legs. “You can say that again. My life wasn’t even normal when it was normal.”

I thought about my childhood from the beginning. Growing up with a biker dad who didn’t live with my mom, and then my mom’s tragic accident. Just thinking about her death gave me a headache. Would I ever be rid of this discontent?

“Sometimes I feel like Dorothy on her way to Emerald City. I thought I was going down the right path and figuring myself out, but ever since Fletcher, I’m lost again. I feel like I got caught in a twister and lost my direction. What if I’m going backward to my old self—before Keystone?”

Niko gazed off into the distance at nothing. “You can’t always know where the path you walk leads, and there will always be obstacles to slow you down. Perhaps you need to walk into the storm to find your answers.”

I shivered and blew a hot breath into my cupped hands. “The Vampire who took me was my maker.”

Niko gave no reply, and I watched him for a moment to read his expression. He didn’t appear surprised.

“What’s confused me is that I like him, Niko. That’s why I went with him in the first place and allowed him to turn me. He’s not conventional, and he’s kind of like you. He sees the world differently and believes people should be true to themselves.”

Niko’s blue eyes grew stony. “But I would never sell you to another. Believe it or not, it took me a long time to realize my Creator was an evil man. I wanted to find reason in what he was doing. Perhaps your maker is a wise man with unconventional ideas, but consider that he might also be insane. Some of the ancients acquire so much knowledge in their lifetime that they’re apathetic to those around them. They rationalize all their wicked behavior. For them, there is no good and evil. They no longer believe in a higher order, and so the world becomes their sandbox.”