Forgive Me(30)

“Sounds like a plan. I’m still working on cracking the code.” Bao turned over the picture so they could both see the cipher IC12843488 written on the back. “Maybe there’s an answer hidden inside that sequence.”





Three days passed and no hidden answers were found. In fact, nothing had changed, which meant Nadine was still missing.

Angie was back home, having visited with her father after work. She had another bag of takeout with her. Her phone rang. It was Mike Webb calling.

“Hey, Mike. What’s going on?”

“A security guard at Union Station saw our poster and called NCMEC, and they just called me. Nadine was there. He’s sure of it. The guy’s name is Sean Musgrave. Good thing I canvassed with new posters. There weren’t any at Union Station when I went there.”

Angie’s heart revved. “Where are your kids?”

“It’s Thursday. They go to their mother’s.”

“Good. I’ll pick you up in an hour.”

“What? To go to DC? Musgrave won’t be back at work until morning.”

“Then we’ll be the first ones to greet him,” Angie said. “We can do a scouting expedition in the meantime. Hit up bus stations with the posters. Ask around. Maybe somebody has seen her or bought a ticket in her name. Maybe we’ll get lucky.”

“Fine, if Katie can keep the kids. But this can’t turn into an extended stay. I’ve got to be back for a party on Saturday. It’s a bounce house plus an obstacle course. Big job.”

“Yeah, so is finding a missing girl. Be ready when I get there.”





CHAPTER 15



Exhibit D: Excerpts from the journal of Nadine Jessup, pages 31-33




Mandy was a girl who showed up at the studio one afternoon and left with Ricardo. I don’t know where they went, what they did, or where she came from. She was tall and thin with mocha colored skin and pretty long black hair. She wore tight jeans and had on a low cut top that left her boobs basically hanging out. Ricardo said she was another client of Macan Entertainment. I asked Mandy if she’d been in any movies and she said plenty and gave a laugh. I didn’t know what that meant. I went to the bathroom and when I came out I saw Ricardo kissing Mandy. Like real kissing. He had his hands all over her ass. I don’t know if he saw me, but I didn’t talk after that. I went into my room and sat on the futon and looked out the window at the cloudy sky and dirty street. I had on jeans and a scoop neck sweater, clothes Ricardo bought for me because he hated everything I wore. I looked in the mirror, but I didn’t look anything like Mandy. She was exotic and beautiful. Ricardo came into my room and asked what was wrong. I told him that I saw him kissing Mandy. He said so what if he did? He’s an adult and he can do what he wants. I told him it made me feel jealous. He told me to grow up and then he left with her.





I remember watching TV . . . something stupid on Netflix. I remember having a burrito for dinner and making a salad. I remember wondering where the hell am I? What am I doing here? I remember getting high and then I didn’t care so much about anything anymore. I think it was eleven o’clock. Ricardo had been out for most of the day and I had been cooped up inside. I didn’t go out because he told me not to leave the studio on my own. He said it wasn’t safe and I’ve been out on the streets with him enough times to know he’s telling the truth. I was still upset about Mandy. I asked what he saw in Mandy that he didn’t see in me. He said plenty, but I was all right. I asked if he slept with her. He told me it wasn’t any of my business. I told him I’m not a dumb little girl from Potomac anymore. He laughed. I told him I wanted to quit. I told him I couldn’t do it anymore. He said, “Jessie, you walk away from me now and I’ll kill you.” He said it joking like, ya know? But I dunno. Something about it didn’t sound like a joke to me.





I was thinking about Mandy a lot. She was eating me up like acid. Was she that much prettier than me? Did she have a better body? Was she better in bed? My emotions count, too! I have feelings, but Ricardo doesn’t seem to care. I cried about it, but he told me to control myself. He wanted sex, but I didn’t want to do it. I wanted him to leave my room. My pictures aren’t any good anyway. I’m no good at this. I’m not a model. I’m not beautiful like Mandy. I just want to go home. Now I miss home. I told Ricardo no to sex. And he grabbed my hair and yanked my head back hard. I cried out because it hurt. He said don’t ever say no.





I’m stuck. Now I get it. I’m isolated from my friends. I have no phone. No money. I don’t even know where the hell I am. All I have is my journal. I keep it hidden inside a slit I made in the mattress. As long as I keep a sheet over the mattress Ricardo can’t see the cut I made. It’s safe to put my secrets here. And my secret is this. I’m going to leave. I’ve decided. Even if I’m broke, I’ll figure it out. I’ll walk away if I have to. Nobody owns me. I’m my own person. He can have Mandy all to himself! Asshole! This whole modeling thing is BS, too. A big heap of BS. Jessica Barlow! Ha. What a joke. Baby, I’m gone. Ricardo just doesn’t know it yet.

Holding off a bit. Ricardo was just so sweet to me. He made me dinner and he gave me a back rub. He told me he was sorry about Mandy. He said she’s nothing compared to me. He was being stupid. He swears to me he didn’t sleep with her. All they did was kiss and he said she was a terrible kisser. Nothing like me. Those were his words not mine. I didn’t tell him I was planning to leave because I didn’t want him to be mad at me. Guess I’ll stay for a bit longer. We’re going to do another photo shoot in the morning. Maybe those will be better. I think Stephen Macan knows we’re living together, but I guess he didn’t care. He just wants good pictures. Who knows? Maybe I killed Jessica Barlow prematurely! LOL!!!