Fall Back Skyward (Fall Back #1)(20)

I’d never seen my brother’s attention claimed by a girl the way it was by Nor. His life had drastically changed when he became sick, leading to his hearing loss. He’d always been so serious, his nose constantly buried in books, or drawing. Then Nor dropped into our lives. And everything changed.

What Nor and I did to him is unforgiveable. I’m not sure we had a choice in the matter though. Sometimes we make the hardest of choices, hoping that one day we will be granted forgiveness. As much as I’d like to put my mind to rest, tell him what happened on the day he came home from prison, I can’t. Nor insists it’s her cross to bear. She blames herself for landing him in prison in the first place. I promised her I’d keep my mouth shut.

I have one more chance to convince him not to give up on her. He still owns her heart, even though he doesn’t know it.

The door silently opens and Cole steps inside, his gaze finding mine. He slips his beanie off his head, shoves his hands inside his pockets and walks toward me.

I sigh and settle back into my pillows.

He has to listen to me. If he doesn’t, I’ll just have to use the dying card. Cruel, I know. But what choice do I have if he doesn’t cooperate?





JOSH LOWERS HIS EYES FROM the ceiling when I walk in. His fingers are intertwined on his stomach, the thumbs twitching every so often.

Taking a deep breath, I stop at the foot of his bed and just stare at him, feeling helpless as f*ck. His weary eyes shift to look over my shoulder before returning back to my face.

“Nor and the girls?”

I clear my throat and have to look away, focusing instead on what’s going on outside the window in Josh’s room. The curtains have been drawn and the orange light of the setting sun filters through the glass. A flock of birds fly by? swooping low in unison before disappearing out of sight. “They are waiting outside.”

His shoulders droop as if relieved. Wetting his cracked lips, he lifts his hand and waves me toward the bed weakly, like a king urging his subject to come closer.

I roll my eyes, and I have to fight the urge to laugh. “Yes, your high *ness.” I sit on the chair that has become a fixture next to the bed.

He smirks, but flinches when he moves slightly to adjust his body. “I might as well take advantage of this. Besides, you can’t deny I look good ordering your ass around.”

I chuckle, shaking my head.

He shrugs. “They shot me with more painkillers, dude. I’m high as a kite right now.” He grins lopsidedly.

He looks down at his intertwined fingers and when he raises his head back up, the bliss on his face has been replaced with an urgent, desperate look. “We need to talk before Nor and the girls come in here.” He takes a deep breath and I wait, my hands automatically fisting on my thighs. “Doc says my body is shutting down.” His speech has considerably slowed down in the few minutes I’ve been in here. “I can feel it. So I need to talk to you before I’m too weak to say shit.”

“You just had to go out with a bang, didn’t you?” I ask, blinking hard to stop the damn tears from falling.

His shoulders shake as he chuckles. “It was the only way to get you to listen.”

He tries to sit upright, but his body buckles beneath his meager weight. I stand up and help him, adjusting the pillows to support his head and back, then start pacing beside his bed without taking my focus off of him. I’m too anxious to sit down.

Questions are fighting for release in my chest but one look at Josh makes me stop. I watch his head roll back and his eyes fall shut. His face contorts as if he’s in pain, and when he opens his eyes again, they are damp with tears.

His chest expands and contracts as he struggles to take air into his lungs. Finally, he runs his tongue along his cracked lips, and levels his gaze at me.

“Remember when Nor moved in next door?” Josh waits until I nod before he continues. “I have never seen you look at anyone like that, Cole. You looked at her like she was your world, like you had the ability to look into her past, her pain, her future. Your future. With little ColeNor brats waddling around in diapers.

“Please. . .just don’t judge her. Listen to her first, okay? You know Nor. You know her heart. And you know she would’ve never done anything to hurt you. She would have done everything in her power to keep you safe, just like you would have for her, which you did. You two are simply crazy. You’d rather get killed while trying to save each other.” His face is flushed from exertion. A bout of coughing interrupts his words. “She’s still in love with you.”

His chest is rising and falling fast. “Take care of her and the girls. Please promise me that, Cole. Be there for her. Our girls will need you when I’m gone. Nor has been waiting a lifetime for you. If there’s anyone to blame, please blame me.”

“Okay. Okay. I blame you, okay? Just calm down, please. I’ll take care of her,” I say desperately, but then the words I just committed to resound in my ears. “No. No. Nor is your wife. You can’t ask me to do that. I’ll make sure they’re okay. Every day. But my life is in New York, Josh. I can’t. . .” I try and fail to gather my words. My thoughts. This is insane. He is insane.

Wiping my eyes, I glance back to the bed, to the body that was once muscular. Healthy. Strong. Now mere bones held together by skin.

I shuffle back to his bedside and reclaim my seat. Lifting my hands, I sign, “God, Josh. She is your wife—”