Faked (Ward Family #2)(45)

Isabel: Do you even realize how wide open you leave yourself for explicit comments after texts like that?





Me: Ha. Sorry. You know what I meant.





Me: I like him. More than I thought I would.





Isabel: Listen, C, if you're looking for someone to give you permission to quit overthinking and just DO THE THING, then I'm your girl. He's gorgeous, funny, and there's no denying he's into you. The better question is why wouldn't you?

Isabel: Don't think too hard about what happens when you come home. Okay? If today is what you have with him, then let him teach you all the wonderful things that he undoubtedly knows. And if that's impossible for you, then ask HIM out on a date when you AND the roads have been plowed, because holy shit, women can do the asking and there's nothing wrong with it. He'd probably friggin love it if you did.





I chewed on my lip, trying to stop the smile at the way her advice lifted the slight pressure on my chest at Bauer's self-imposed distance. She was right. He did want this, and he'd wanted it longer than I had. And no matter how badly we tried to ignore the way the bruises deep in our souls affected our relationships, this was the perfect example.

I wanted him.

He wanted me.

But I was overthinking because I wanted to know that everything would turn out okay.

He was pulling away because of how strongly he avoided possible rejection. Yes, he was protecting me, but he was protecting himself too.

We were products of our circumstances, but we didn't have to let those circumstances steer the wheel of every choice we made. A lot of people did, but sitting there in the slowly darkening loft, I didn't want to anymore.

When the sun rose in the morning, there was no way I'd look at Bauer with regret or disappointment. No, I couldn't guarantee how this would play out, but what I knew about him and how he was making me feel was enough.

I stood and turned on the small lamp on the dresser, casting the loft in a soft yellow glow. With careful movements, I pulled off my sweatshirt and smoothed my hands down the front of my simple T-shirt. As seductive outfits went, it wasn't my top choice, but so far, that hadn't been an issue for Bauer.

The elastic in my hair came out easily, and my hair fell around my shoulders, messy waves left behind from the way I'd had it pulled back after my shower. The girl staring back at me in the mirror wasn't overthinking anything. She knew exactly what and who she wanted.

I took the stairs quietly and paused when I saw Agnes sitting on the corner of the bottom one. She licked her paw and watched me with slitted eyes. Carefully, I scratched the top of her head as I passed, and she gave me a happy, rumbling purr in response.

That had me smiling as I walked around the edge of the couch.

Bauer was still lying there, his long legs sprawled out and one arm flung over his face, his chest rising and falling in an even rhythm. Briefly, I paused because oh geez, had he fallen asleep?

But as quickly as I thought it, he dropped his arm and pinned me with an inscrutable look as I stood over him.

Okay, so this part was one that I hadn't thought out. Like the choreography of my little gesture.

No second thoughts, I reminded myself.

With both hands, I reached for the hem of my shirt and tugged it up over my head.

Bauer sat up slowly as I let it drop to the floor, his jaw tightening, eyes burning furiously over the skin I'd just exposed. Left in my leggings and simple bralette, I took a step forward and swung one leg over his hip so I could settle onto his lap.

His hands slid up my back, and he dropped his head into the crook of my shoulder while he seemed to try to get his breathing under control. Underneath me, he was big. Hard. Ready.

My hands wandered up his shoulders and over the back of his head. I kissed his temple, then licked along the edge of his ear, insanely gratified when his fingers tightened painfully on my back. They moved then, started to tug down the strap of my bralette. His mouth trailed along the skin on my chest, small sucking kisses that he soothed with his tongue.

When he reached the tops of my breast, he used the edge of his thumb to work me into a rolling mass of want. Still, we hadn't kissed. Still, we hadn't spoken a single word.

His head came back, eyes almost black in the dying firelight, and he searched my expression carefully.

I gripped the sides of his face firmly, so he wouldn't—couldn't—look away.

"I want you," I told him. "I want this, with you."

Bauer surged forward and took my mouth. Oh, he took it deep and sweet and hot and hungry. Endless, wonderful kisses that had us panting and sighing and moaning as my hands ripped at his shirt.

He took pity, breaking away to tear it off. My hands slid over his skin, wonderful and gorgeous and stacked with muscles.

Using his hands underneath my ass, he picked me up and turned us so that I was underneath him on the couch. Once I was settled, those hands moved onto the waistband of my leggings as he peeled them off. They landed in a heap with his shirt and mine. My underwear came next, his tongue coming out to lick along his bottom lip in a way that had me writhing helplessly while he stood and shucked off his pants and boxer briefs.

Before he came back between my legs, Bauer snagged his wallet from the side table and pulled out a condom.

I widened my legs so that he could settle his hips between them, and our hands greedily swept over all the places now bared to our eyes. After only a few minutes, I cried out because that wrist thing he'd done earlier in the day, the twist of his hand that felt so dirty when I was fully clothed, had me damp with sweat and my toes curling against the couch.