Confessions of a Curious Bookseller(10)
Sam,
I understand that your grandfather is old (my father is old as well), but please be reminded that I am not taking away your Thanksgiving. You will, no doubt, still have plenty of time to eat with him and drive back from Pittsburgh as long as you don’t leave too late. Need I remind you, as I needed to remind both Angela and Kyle, who had the courage to approach me directly, that you are in retail, and you must understand that this commitment comes with the territory. I will not be visiting my family on Thanksgiving as I will be here preparing for Friday. You should count yourself lucky that I am not asking you to come in the evening before Thanksgiving—or worse, the evening of—and help me. I make sacrifices so that the three of you can have a semblance (in fact, more than a semblance) of a family life while still working in retail. My brother-in-law has been in retail for fifteen years and has never had a long Thanksgiving weekend or a decent Christmas break, and he is still a functioning family member. This should give you some comfort.
See you Friday,
Fawn, Owner
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Wed, Nov 21, 2018 at 7:00 PM
To: Jacob Whitney
Subject: HIGH IMPORTANCE: Please Advise
Dear Mr. Whitney,
I can only assume that you are either injured or with family in a location that does not have the internet. I have been informed that my nemesis, the bookstore down the street, will be opening its nefarious doors for the first time on Black Friday! Though this is a potentially cataclysmic event, what would greatly allow us to stand a chance against this monster is if we simply had the Mark Twain books. I have paid you the money and saw that you cashed the check. PLEASE deliver the books before Friday, and I will be eternally grateful.
Stressed but hopeful,
Fawn Birchill, Owner, The Curious Cat Book Emporium (a Mark Twain specialist store)
P.S. When I close my eyes and go to sleep at night, three words float around in my head like lava in a lamp: chapter 7 bankruptcy. Don’t be the leak in my ship, Mr. Whitney.
November 21
Dear Fawn,
I cut out some CVS coupons and have enclosed them here. I thought they might be of use to you. I am also enclosing a funny Cathy comic that made me LOL. I hope you like it.
Hope to see you at Thanksgiving!
Mother
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Wed, Nov 21, 2018 at 8:14 PM
To: Staff
Subject: Please Advise
Dear Staff,
As you may be aware, the new bookstore’s official opening will be on Black Friday. Before we all panic, I have a strategy! I went to CVS and bought some poster supplies so we can announce our 40 percent off sale. We will put posters in the windows and adhere them to the telephone pole outside the store. I have taken photos of the posters with the digital camera and am having trouble uploading them to show you, but if you have free time tonight to stop by the store and give me your opinion, I would be very grateful.
If anyone can offer me some tech support through email regarding uploading the photos from this hellish device, I would be equally grateful. When I connect the wire from the camera to the computer, it doesn’t prompt me to do anything but assumes I know exactly what to hit or what program to open, as if I am some kind of technical savant. The thing about computers is that they are presumptuous machines and show neither patience nor adaptability based on the user’s level of comprehension. Although I understand they are insentient machines, this still infuriates me, as I am forced to write to my dear employees for help the night before Thanksgiving when most of you are no doubt hitting the booze. I, too, am minutes away from that myself—not because of relaxation, but because I can’t handle this project sober for another minute.
Any assistance is greatly appreciated!
Best wishes,
Fawn, Owner
From: Jacob Whitney
Sent: Wed, Nov 21, 2018 at 9:03 PM
To: Fawn Birchill
Re: HIGH IMPORTANCE: Please Advise
Greetings!
Terribly sorry for the delay on my part. As Black Friday is right around the corner, this would be a very costly, last-minute request. I’ll see what I can do.
Regards,
Jacob
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Wed, Nov 21, 2018 at 9:09 PM
To: Jacob Whitney
Re: HIGH IMPORTANCE: Please Advise
Dear Mr. Whitney,
Thank you for your reply!! If you had been paying attention to my emails from the beginning, you would have had plenty of time to arrange a delivery of these books before Black Friday. As it stands, we are too late for traditional shipping, but please understand that I am willing to rent a truck, drive to Paoli, and pick them up myself right now. Though I haven’t driven in many years and am terrified of highways, I am willing to do this because it is that important to me. Or, you could simply hire a delivery service to bring them here tonight. I will pay for it.
Sincerely,
Fawn Birchill, Owner, The Curious Cat Book Emporium (a Mark Twain specialist store)
From: Fawn Birchill
Sent: Wed, Nov 21, 2018 at 9:18 PM
To: Staff
Subject: Please Advise
Hello again!
Can someone please assist me through email or phone on how to send the photographs of the posters over to you all for final approval? I’m not sure if they look right and I could use your opinions. I took the pictures with my camera, but I can’t figure out how to get them onto the computer.