Begin Again (Again #1)(47)

After I’d finished my coffee, we went back up into the shop and looked at records. We found lots that we both wanted, but also some that Kaden sniffed at. I let him lead me to a listening station, where he put huge, black headphones on my head that instantly swallowed all the sounds around me. From a basket that stood between the listening stations he randomly picked out CDs and put them in the player, one after the other. If I liked what I heard, I would give it a thumbs-up. If not, the corners of my mouth turned down. By now, Kaden knew my taste pretty well. One album made my heart pound, because the songs—though old and forgotten—seemed so familiar. Beaming, I glanced up at Kaden. A satisfied smile spread across his lips.

After a while, I closed my eyes and thought back to the last time I’d heard Ocean Avenue by Yellowcard. Music had helped me through so many hard days. Some songs were associated with a specific emotion, and I only needed to hear a few of the first notes to bring that feeling flooding back, no matter where I was. With this song, it was like it had a magic ability to heal me, each and every time.

“I love this song,” I said, and Kaden winced—his hand shot out and he held it over my mouth. I guess I’d been a bit loud—several people had turned to look our way. After the last notes faded away, I removed the headphones and shook out my hair.

“After this morning’s trip I wanted to be sure that your taste is still intact.”

“You only had to put up with two songs by Taylor, so don’t even.”

I put down my headphones and moved on to an aisle I hadn’t yet explored.

Kaden walked along the left side, looking through the shelves, while I rummaged through the ones on the right. Whenever either of us found a record we liked, we’d show each other. The new cover of Fall Out Boy had a face on it, and when Kaden held the record up to look at it, he unknowingly held it so that it looked like his body belonged to the head on the cover. I giggled and pulled out my phone to capture the image. When I showed it to him, he insisted on taking a similar photo of me. It didn’t take long before he—with a triumphant grin—found the Ocean Avenue record whose cover featured the face of a girl against the background of the sea and a sunset. Kaden wanted to take the photo, but I insisted that he stand next to me so we could take a selfie. This wasn’t easy, since I couldn’t see what I was doing, and by now I was laughing so hard that I dropped the record and then the phone. But after several tries we managed, and in the end of our impromptu photo session I had not only a cool photo but also a bellyache from laughing.

By the time we walked back to his mom’s house that evening, it was already dark. Kaden had given me one of the nicest days I’d ever had. Against my own expectations, I realized that spending the holiday here was making me happy.

Actually, very.





Chapter 18


The day had been great, but not the night. I wanted to flee from this strange bed and look for Kaden. I just couldn’t stop thinking. As soon as my eyes closed, I saw him in front of me; his smile, or the way he ran his fingers through his hair when he was pondering something. And his kisses. I had to stop these thoughts. Today had been so nice and was further proof that our friendship actually worked.

Still, my entire body tingled, also in places that had absolutely nothing to do with friendship. With a groan of frustration, I turned on my side and pulled the blanket over my head, as if to deny my improper thoughts or even my body. It didn’t work. Sleep was impossible. I just tossed and turned in Kaden’s childhood bed. At some point I even caught myself sniffing at his pillow to see if it smelled like him.

We’d come that far. It was pathetic.

In the morning, the aftereffects were visible in the form of deep rings under my eyes. Grabbing the towel that Rachel had left for me, I headed for the bathroom hoping a shower would wake me. Yellowcard was still running through my head; I hummed while lathering the shampoo. I was just putting shower gel in my hand when the bathroom door opened.

“Good morning.”

It was more shocking than the cold water.

“Get out, Kaden!” I hissed. Luckily the shower curtain wasn’t see-through.

Kaden laughed. “You didn’t lock it. That’s practically an invitation.”

Dammit, he was right. I was so used to not having a lock on the bathroom door by now, I’d forgotten to lock this door. “You’re out of your mind, Kaden. Leave!” Now my right eye was burning from the shampoo, and I cursed out loud.

“Don’t let me disturb you.”

Kaden turned on the faucet in the sink and began brushing his teeth.

My refreshing morning shower had taken on a hectic undertone. First I tried to get the soap out of my eye; then soaped myself up in record time, glancing every few seconds at the shower curtain, hoping he couldn’t see through it.

“I had a lot of fun yesterday,” Kaden mumbled, toothbrush still in his mouth.

“Me too. But I’d still like to shower in peace. I thought we were clear on stuff like that,” I griped.

“Don’t make such a big deal out of it, Bubbles.” He laughed.

That arrogant, little …

“Kaden? Are you in there?” came Rachel’s voice from the hall.

“Oh my God,” I whispered, my hands flying up to my face. My silent prayer: Please don’t let Rachel come in here, too.

“Yeah, I’m here.” Kaden seemed unfazed.