Begin Again (Again #1)(27)

I chewed carefully. It was delicious. The combination of sauce, cheese, pepperoni, and anchovies. Yes, anchovies. I took another bite and moaned with pleasure.

Dawn laughed, and even Kaden let out a chuckle.

“I think you chose well,” Spencer said. Kaden just shrugged his shoulders and took another bite.

“I can’t imagine life without pizza anymore,” I sighed after a while, and everyone laughed.

“You have seriously never had a pizza before? I mean, that’s kind of weird,” Ethan wondered aloud. Monica gave him a light punch in the arm.

“None of us is really normal, Ethan,” she said. “Just look at us. I’m fascinated by fingernails.”

“I’m obsessed with red hair,” Spencer said, his mouth full. Dawn stiffened next to me. “I’m serious, if a woman has red hair, she’s ten times hotter in my eyes.”

I laughed.

“You’ve lost it, man.” Shaking his head, Kaden leaned back and wiped his mouth with a napkin.

“What? Monica is right. None of us is really normal,” Spencer retorted. “You have relationship problems, for some reason Allie never ordered pizza, Monica loves nails, and Dawn … has red hair.” Spencer blinked several times.

Everyone snorted with laughter except for Dawn, who was blushing.

“I don’t have relationship problems,” Kaden said. “It’s my choice to avoid a relationship.”

“Yeah, and look what you miss,” Monica chuckled, pointing to herself. “Exhibit A.”

Kaden just rolled his eyes.

“You’re an ass, but you know what? I still love you!” She jumped up and hugged him. He grimaced as she kissed his check and tried half-heartedly to disentangle himself from her.

I wasn’t the only one who saw him smile.

The following week I spent a lot of time with Kaden and his friends. Dawn always came over the moment her roommate was entertaining a man—which happened quite a lot—and we tried out all the delivery services in the area.

Living with Kaden was getting easier. He even started letting me use his TV when he wasn’t there. And when he was there, he didn’t kick me off the couch, but let me stay and watch series with him.

This afternoon we watched a superhero flick. In the morning I had finished my last literature exam, and to celebrate we ordered a huge box of sushi.

The doorbell rang, and I jumped.

“Are you expecting someone?” Kaden asked.

I shook my head and got up, since he was still eating. I went to the door and peered through the peephole.

No. No way. I caught my breath.

It was my mother.





Chapter 10


It felt like ice-cold claws had encircled my neck.

My knees were weak.

My heart stopped.

I couldn’t breathe.

I jerked away from the door and pressed my back against the wall.

“Bubbles?” Kaden called out and leaned toward the left on the couch, so he could see me from the living room.

With wide eyes, I stared at him and shook my head vigorously.

“What’s the matter?” he asked, his voice growing louder.

I looked down at myself. In this condition, there was no way I could open the door.

Kaden was instantly at my side, looking at me with a frown and then taking a look through the peephole.

The bell rang again, three times in quick succession.

“Is that … ” He raised both brows.

“My mother,” I whispered and hoped he understood.

“Crystal!” Her voice penetrated the closed door, muffled. An energetic knocking followed.

This time my heart was still. Kaden would have to call an ambulance to revive me.

“Crystal Allison Harper! I know you’re here. I located your cell phone signal!”

With trembling fingers I tried to smooth my shirt. Kaden stepped forward and grabbed me by the shoulders. His eyes darkened as he studied my face intensively. He couldn’t have any idea what was going on here, but his gaze told me he understood I needed help.

“Go change your clothes, take your time,” he said, thinking on his feet. “I’ll make her a cup of coffee or something.”

I couldn’t speak, only nod. I kept on nodding. And nodding.

“And you should do that in your room, Allie,” he said calmly and shoved me out of the hallway.

My legs were heavy as lead, as I went into my room and closed the door.

I looked at the room with Mom’s eyes and felt sick. She would hate it, I was sure of that. And she wouldn’t hesitate to say it, either.

Furious, I tore off my jogging pants and slipped into a pair of jeans. I’d barely moved in here. I was just getting used to it. How could she ambush me like this?

I heard voices in the hall but didn’t understand what was being said. As if in a trance, I put took a rose-colored blouse from my dresser, which I’d last worn in Lincoln. But then I paused.

No.

I wouldn’t dress up for her.

I glanced in the mirror. And now a strange calm descended on me.

I’d feel better if I could be myself, and I didn’t want to give her the satisfaction of turning me back into the girl I used to be, just by showing up. I stuffed the blouse back into the drawer and kept on my Woodshill shirt.