As She Fades(45)

“Sure,” I agreed. My mother instantly smiled and I needed to see that. Her face hadn’t been smiling lately. The frown and worry lines were proof she hadn’t been well the past month. I needed to do this for her especially.

“I’m going to go get Catherine and the girls. They’ll want to be here for the ice cream,” Dylan announced.

“Okay … be careful,” my father called out, and I saw Dylan frown then nod before stepping out of the room. I wasn’t sure I’d heard Dad say be careful over something as simple as going to pick someone up. Many things had changed.

Not just my life but also theirs. Our family had never dealt with this kind of fear. It had shaken us, and yet here we all were. The life of summertime sun tea, ice pops, neighborhood barbecues, and sneaking cookies from Momma’s big strawberry jar were the easy happy memories we all had. No real pain.

Until now.

Laying my head back, I closed my eyes. I heard Meredith Grey on the TV and Jonah telling Dad about the new place he was going next. But all I could do was breathe. Because I’d woken up to a life I wasn’t sure of. Crawford still wasn’t here. And then … there was someone else missing. Someone important. I just didn’t know who.

“She’s sleeping. Turn that down.” Michea’s voice returned. He was back with the ice cream, but I’d wait on the girls to eat it. I just wanted a moment to hide behind my closed eyes. This would be my only escape for a while. I didn’t imagine they were going to leave me alone anytime soon. And I wasn’t sure I wanted them to. The demons in the darkness now were lurking. The memories and the terror of that night would never leave me.





CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE

SLATE

“FULL HOUSE, MOTHERFUCKER,” Uncle D said, slapping his cards down on the rolling tray table that sat between me and him.

The old man was as foul-mouthed as he was good at Texas Hold ’Em. I knew playing a game with him would give him bragging rights for the next week, but I did it anyway. He had just survived yet another surgery to remove the tumors in his body, only to find out he was eaten up. There was no way of getting it all. He’d have to go through chemo and then maybe that would give him a few extra months. But right now he wasn’t accepting that.

“I need a Coke. You want something?” I asked him, standing up.

“Giving up?” he asked in a mocking tone.

“Hell no. Just thirsty. Thought I’d check in on Knox and his sister. Haven’t seen him today.” I had run into my fraternity brother a week after his sister had been admitted to the hospital. It was before Uncle D’s surgery. His little sister was in a coma from a car accident. He had been so damn pale and looked like he hadn’t slept in weeks. I’d been trying to stop by and bring him a coffee every morning. Today, though, Uncle D’s doctor had stopped me in the hall to give me the news that he didn’t expect Uncle D to live six months with chemo. Or maybe a month without.

Uncle D was saying he didn’t want the chemo. I wasn’t ready to lose him. He was all I had. I was arguing with him and his stubborn ass.

“Poor family. Tell the boy not to be a stranger.” He shook his head. “Take your time, but get me a goddamn coffee and a smoke.”

We were in a hospital. He knew he wasn’t getting a smoke. Yet here he was still asking for it. “I’ll be back with coffee,” I told him pointedly. “You want the remote?” I asked, handing it to him.

“Yeah, I’ll watch me some trash TV. Better than the real shit.”

Smiling, I walked out of his room. That man had been the one to show up and take me from the system after my mother was found dead. The state would have thrown me from one foster home to another if he hadn’t come and taken me in. I’d worked hard for him, and he’d taught me to be a man.

Knox was walking down the hallway toward the elevator when I stepped into the hall leading to his sister’s room. I was welcomed there. His family was always offering me food and asking about my uncle. They were the good kind of people I wasn’t used to being around. Seeing his sister hooked up to machines and unresponsive had been heartbreaking. She was so young and beautiful. I knew the color of her eyes, even though she’d never opened them. I had seen photos. In photos she was always laughing or smiling. There was something warm and real about her that made you want to be near that. It was obvious her family thought the same thing. Knox was close to her. I understood worrying about losing someone you loved. I was dealing with the same thing.

*

“HEY, MAN, HOW’S it going?” I asked Knox once I was close enough. He smiled. A real smile. One I hadn’t seen since the end-of-the-year party we’d had at Kappa Sigma.

“She’s awake,” he said. “And she’s okay. Talking, remembers everything.” As he said that, a frown replaced his smile. “Asking about Crawford, and I haven’t been able to get his ass on the phone. He’s enjoying the college life a little too much.”

I’d gotten bad news today, but hearing Knox’s news helped. Uncle D would be happy to hear she was awake. He’d been worrying about her since I told him the girl was a frat brother’s sister. He was a grumpy old man, but he had a huge heart.

“That’s great news. I was about to get you some coffee and check in with you. I’m glad to hear she’s awake. I know the rest of the family is relieved.”