As She Fades(23)

Great. He was going to talk.

“This is a library.” I stated the obvious but didn’t look up.

I heard him laugh, and I suddenly wanted to hurl a book at him myself.

“Yeah, it is. Getting sucked off in the shelves isn’t so bad. Kind of hot. Thinking about someone walking up and catching you. Are you a virgin, Vale?”

That got my attention. I lifted my head and stared directly at him. His pants were back up and zipped, which was a relief. “That’s not your business.”

He shrugged. “The shade of red you were when you saw us makes me think you’ve not had sex yourself.”

I was not going to be made fun of by this man-whore. “I’ve slept with Crawford.”

Slate smirked.”I wasn’t talking about sleeping, sweetheart. I was talking about fucking.”

Why was hearing him say that word attractive? It wasn’t a nice word, but when he said it my heart picked up and butterflies went a little crazy in my stomach. What was wrong with me?

“I need to study,” I informed him.

“I texted you. You didn’t respond.”

Why was he bringing that up? “I was asleep.”

“I know. I saw you.”

That got my complete attention. “What?”

He closed the distance between us and pulled out the chair across from me. “I came with Everly up to your room. To see you. And you were in bed asleep. You’re a cute sleeper.”

I hadn’t even heard them. I didn’t like the idea of them being in the room with me asleep. It was an invasion of privacy. “She shouldn’t have let you in the room with me in bed,” I snapped, angry at them both.

“I agree. I told her not to do it again.”

Again … what? “I’m confused.”

He leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms over his chest. “Everly is a selfish bitch. So I warned her if she ever let another guy in that room with you sleeping I’d make sure it never happened again.”

Oh. I didn’t know what to say to that.

“She knows I don’t make threats lightly. I rarely make them. But you’ll be safe. I promise.”

“Why do you care?” I asked before I could stop myself.

He shrugged. “To tell you the truth, I don’t know. But I care. That’s all that matters.”





CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

I’M NOT SURE what happened that day in the library, but something unspoken was said. Things were not the same. Slate started texting me regularly. Not simple Good night texts, either. We had actual texting conversations. About classes, Everly’s obsessive issues, coffee, the fact I’d had coffee with Charlie again, and even what we were eating.

It was like Slate simply wanted to talk to me. Nothing more. And although it was just texting, we were getting close. Closer than I had ever felt to a guy other than Crawford. Slate was truly becoming my friend.

He invited me to coffee often, met me after classes, and for a week we went to lunch together five times. I liked being around Slate. He made me laugh and he didn’t pressure me for anything more than friendship. Unlike Charlie, who had kept dropping hints that he would like to date. I couldn’t date. There was Crawford.

Slate took my mind off that pain. When I was with him, things felt better. Happier. Like I might actually find joy again. Deep down, I thought at times about a future without Crawford. Even though it made me feel incredibly guilty, I still thought about it.

For the first time since the accident, I truly had something to feel guilty about. I was living the life we had planned together. I didn’t think about Crawford all the time, and my chest wasn’t always tight with the pain of loss. Sometimes I would laugh and not realize until later that day that Crawford hadn’t crossed my mind. I wasn’t proud of it, but I was learning to enjoy life as it was at the moment. Slate was helping me. Mae was too. But Slate was … more.

I just wasn’t sure what kind of more he was. Because although Crawford wasn’t with me, my heart was still with him. It had been since I was six. Could that ever truly change?

*

EVERLY WAS GETTING dressed up for a party at Kappa Sigma that I knew nothing about. It hurt when she told me. The slice came out of nowhere. It wasn’t that I was surprised by it. Slate had become my friend. His not inviting me to his fraternity house party made me feel less important to him than he’d become to me. I wasn’t expecting an invite as his date or anything … but as a friend. At least.

“Knock, knock.” Mae stuck her head in the door, glanced around to see the room free of Everly, then smiled at me and came on in.

“She’s in the bathroom,” I told her before she started talking about her. Mae was not an Everly fan. I didn’t know many people who were.

“Who’s the hot date tonight?” she whispered, walking over to Everly’s bed and picking up the tiny piece of fabric I think was supposed to be her top.

“Not sure. Kappa Sigma party.”

Mae turned her gaze to me and frowned. “You’re not going?”

It was common knowledge now that I was Slate Allen’s only female friend in the history of the world. I shook my head, hoping the hurt wasn’t shining in my eyes.

“Jerk,” Mae mumbled, then walked over to my closet and began going through my things. I watched her, as she appeared to be on a mission. Until she tossed a pair of black leggings and a strapless silver top that I normally wore under a jacket at me. “Put this on,” she said, then started going through my shoes.