A Life More Complete(57)
“No way. Oh, Mel you’re finally growing up.” Bob continues to tease her until she finally gets pissed and he gives up. We talk about work and that’s when Bob drops the bomb that neither of us saw coming.
“I want to tell you guys something and please don’t be mad.” He stops for a minute and looks down at the table. “Today is my last event with Ellie Regan. I quit.” He stops again and neither Melinda nor I say anything. “I took a job working for Jon. It’s serious, not the job, but the relationship. I want it to work and I know if I stay it’ll ruin everything.”
I look at Melinda and her eyes mirror mine, both filled with tears. I notice I’m more hesitant to cry over this than Melinda. The tears begin to fall quickly down her cheeks. I recognize that I’ve become almost immune to leaving. It’s easy for me to separate feelings when I watch something disband. This scenario has played out in my life so many times that watching someone walk away is a known fact. Bob and Melinda are my family and now I’m losing that, too. As much as I want to feel something more, I can only feel happiness for Bob. He’s getting out and will hopefully see what it’s like to have a normal, healthy relationship that isn’t dominated by an overpowering job and countless hours of thankless work.
“I’m glad,” I say with a huge smile on my face. The remnants of tears drying in my eyes as I stand up and hug him. “I want you to be happy, so do what you need to do. Of course, professionally I want you to stay, but for you personally, go, get as far away from here as you can. Be normal, love Jon and be happy.”
When I look at Melinda she is still sniffling into her beer, wiping her eyes with a cocktail napkin as she stands to hug Bob, too. He whispers something in her ear and she giggles a little. I knew Melinda would take this harder than me. She’s always been far needier of Bob’s attention and I’ve always let her seek what she felt was hers. Given my history, I’ve always had a harder time letting people in, so Mel bonded with Bob instantly. I think she viewed him as neutral, someone she wouldn’t ever be able to sleep with, someone who would love her no matter what. She’ll struggle with losing him, but she’ll be okay. We both will. Bob likes Melinda, but he loves me. There’s a difference and eventually their friendship may fade, I can’t say for certain, but I do know that Melinda is far more fickle and self-absorbed. I’ve watched many of her friendships fade. I, on the other hand will always have Bob. It takes far too long for me to develop close lasting relationships, so when I do they remain intact.
I grab my beer and take the last drink in one big gulp. Bob gets another round and we sit and talk for over an hour. He tells us that he is moving in with Jon and feels it’s the right move. They’re buying a house in Newport Beach to be closer to Jon’s office, which will now be Bob’s, too. This statement makes Melinda cry again. She says that it’s too far and she’ll never see him again. I reach across the small bar table and cover her hand with mine. She swings her head around and grabs my hand.
“Holy shit! You’re engaged?” That better be fake,” she screams in a shrill voice. She shoves my hand in Bob’s face. “Can you believe this shit?” she says staring down at the diamond on my finger.
“Yeah, I guess I am.” I’m really not sure what to say. As much as I love Tyler, I don’t want the judgment that my choice will bring. All my life, I’ve never felt the need to explain my actions, but right now I do. “Tyler asked last night, after we got back from dinner and I said yes. It’s really soon, I know, but it really isn’t. We’ve been together...” Melinda cuts me off abruptly.
“You don’t have to defend your choice to me,” Melinda says. “I saw you two together. It was so perfectly adorable.” She turns to Bob. “They are so cute. And oh my God, Bob, he’s totally gorgeous.” Melinda carries on for several more minutes filling Bob in on Tyler and how we met, she makes it sound like a movie. She leaves out all the bad parts, fails to mention what an * he used to be and I guess when displayed in her light of perfectionism, it does sound quite amazing. “Soon, yep, but who cares. Do what makes you happy. Yours and Tyler’s story is so perfectly cute that it can’t end any other way but with you two getting married. Why put off the inevitable?”
Bob is quiet and I know that his reaction isn’t going to be as stellar as Melinda’s. He is far more controlled than Melinda and I can tell by the look on his face that he isn’t as thrilled with my spontaneous decision. When he eyes me, I look away quickly. I feel like he can sense my uncertainty, but he won’t say it with Melinda around. “If this is what you want then go for it.” He shrugs his shoulders and pulls me into a hug, quietly whispering in my ear before he pulling away, “I love you, but are you sure?” I nod slightly and smile, but his words replay in my head over and over.