A Beautiful Forever(28)

“Yeah, whatever man,” Gavin laughs. “You missed a fun party though. Shane got totally hammered and started dancing on the tables. It was so funny.”

“Ah well, sorry we missed it. Where’s Brian?” asks Elliot.

“He’s gone to pick up the new girl from the airport, Jolene, I think her name is,” answers Naomi.

“Is he in Shane’s car?” I ask. I meant to ask Shane what he was doing with it before he left.

“Yeah, Shane said he can use it until it sells,” Gavin informs me.

“How much does he want for it?” I ask.

“Couple of grand. Talk to Brian if you’re interested.”

“I will, thanks,” I say as I go into the kitchen and slide bread for Elliot and I into the toaster.

He follows me in, collects two cups and starts preparing instant coffee. “Are you thinking of buying a car?”

Nodding, I say, “Yeah, well, it would be handy don’t you think? We could take a drive to the country - see some other parts of the UK. Besides, I can’t stay here forever. After you go home, I think I should find somewhere on my own.”





Elliot


After you go home, the words echo in my ears and constrict my chest slightly. I don’t want to go and the fact she’s making plans regarding what she’s going to do when I leave bothers me.

“Where will you live?” I ask, trying to keep my aggravation out of my voice.

She shrugs as she concentrates on buttering our toast, “I haven’t decided yet,” she replies turning slightly to look at me. When she sees my face, she does a double take, sighs and turns to face me.

“You’re annoyed,” she states.

“I’m fine,” I say, totally not meaning it.

She takes a step towards me and places her hands on my chest, leaning into me as she speaks quietly, “Don’t make this harder than it already is, we both knew we only had a short time together… How about we don’t talk about what happens when you leave? We can deal with it when the time comes.”

I sigh and wrap my arms around her, burying my face in her hair. I have three weeks left. I've never felt so powerless over my own destiny before, not even when my father made me choose between Katrina and his financial support. Back then, that seemed horrible, and although I probably made the wrong choice at the time, I still had one. This time, I have to go home, I have to leave her, or I risk not being allowed to come back.





Chapter 22


Paige


After breakfast, Elliot excuses himself to go and have a shower. I can tell he’s still a little upset with me for mentioning my plans for when he goes home. I guess that was a little insensitive of me, I’m happy to leave the subject alone, but we can’t pretend like it isn’t going to happen. He needs to leave, and I need to stay.

Knocking on the bathroom door, I call to him that I’m going out for a while, I don’t wait to hear his response, but the others know I’m leaving so they can tell him for me.

I’ve told them all that I’ll pick up some milk while I’m out but my true reason for going is to take some time to think on my own. I feel so guilty about what’s happening between me and Elliot. He is so beautiful and kind, and I seriously wonder why in the world, he would choose me. Was it just that I was there when he was looking or was it some higher power that pushes people together and takes away their good sense and reasoning?

My stomach churns as I think about him leaving because let’s face it - I’m falling for him, hard. All we have left in this world is three more perfect weeks together, and it’s more than I could hope for. Long term, there’s simply no way we could make it, once I tell him everything about my past, it would be virtually impossible for him to look at me the same way he does now. As much as I’d like to keep it all a secret, I can’t, I mean, things would be fine for a while but eventually my secrets would push him away – I just can’t pin all of my hopes on him.

I find a bench to sit on and scroll through the messages on my phone, there are at least ten notifications, telling me there are voice messages waiting – I know they’re from my parents but I haven’t been able to bring myself to listen to them but their ever increasing number keeps staring at me, taunting my curiosity.

I select one and my thumb hovers over the screen, just above the voicemail number. Nerves and foreboding fill my body, and I can’t seem to force myself to touch the numbers and make the call.

Blowing out my breath as I squeeze the emotion from my eyes, I hit the home button and select my gallery instead. I select the most recent photo I have of Elliot and I on the train when we were riding to Shane’s party last night, I touch his face on the screen and flick to the next one. It’s the one of us kissing outside the cemetery on that ghost walk he took me on.

Deciding to focus on Elliot and deal with my family issues in three weeks’ time, I delete my voicemail notifications and place my phone back in my bag on a sigh.

“I can do this,” I say to myself as I rise from the bench, heading towards the supermarket to go and buy the milk to take back with me.





Elliot


Paige has been gone for ages, and I’m starting to get worried, our new housemate, Jolene, has been here for nearly an hour already, and she’s still not back from getting milk.

I think about sending her a text or calling her, but I don’t want to seem too overbearing or worse – needy, even though right now, I feel like she’s the only reason my body allows me to take a breath.

Jolene seems like a nice enough girl. She's a Bondi girl same as me and thinks we might have actually mixed at some point as she used to date a guy I knew from Sydney Grammar. I probably have met her before, but she would have been like every other girl I knew back then and overlooked me because of my weight.

She keeps touching me on the arm, and I can see Naomi giving me a sympathetic smile. She knows me well enough by now to know that I don’t like girls who are all over me the moment we meet. I know I exploited the reaction girls have to me for a while after I broke up with Katrina, but that’s just not who I am. I like girls who like me for me, which is why I’m so glad when the door opens, and Paige walks in carrying the milk.





Paige


As soon as I open the door, I see everyone sitting on the floor talking around the coffee table. What’s the deal with the floor today? Is there a broken spring on the couch or something? Then I notice the new girl, Jocelyn – or something? I’m shit with names, so I’m not quite sure what hers is. However, she is paying a lot of attention to Elliot; her hand is on his arm, and she’s saying, “I can’t believe I have probably known you for most of my life, and I can’t even remember!”

He turns around and sees me, jumping up guiltily and coming over to greet me. My chest hurts, and I feel immediately sick. I was just out agonising over my feelings for him, and he’s back here flirting with the new girl?!

“Having fun?” I ask straight away. The new girl gets up and follows him over.

“Hi, I’m Jolene. You must be Paige,” she says, holding her hand out to shake mine. I look at it for a moment before I decide to give it a quick shake. She looks at me with uncertainty, “Um, Elliot and I were just catching up, turns out we knew a few of the same people at school.”

“I see,” I say flatly, I can feel that I’m being awful right now, but I don’t want her around me. “Excuse me,” I say as I place the milk in the fridge and walk to my room, locking the door behind me.





Elliot


I’m not really sure what’s wrong with her. She just came inside and was all annoyed. She was really rude to Jolene and didn’t even say hi to anyone else. I glance at Jolene, who’s looking around the room awkwardly.

“I need to go and see what’s wrong with her,” I say.

“Oh!” she says, seeming a little confused before it clicks. “Are you two together?”

“We are,” I confirm as I head off down the hallway and tap on the door before trying to open it. It’s locked. “Paige,” I call through it. “Can you open the door please?”

She doesn’t answer so shaking my head in annoyance, I stalk back to the entryway to go and get my keys and open it myself. As I pass the lounge room all eyes are on me, but the look on my face must tell them I’m not in the mood for talking to them because they quickly look away and pretend to be talking about something else.





Paige


We had pushed the two beds together last night, so I’m lying across the middle of both of them, listening to Radiohead’s OK Computer, my headphones blasting the track Lucky into my ears to block out any sounds around me. I just over reacted big time. I’ve never done the jealous girlfriend thing before – although I’ve never cared so much about someone before. In the past, the men I was with were a means to an end, I chose them for reasons other than attraction.