Under the Table(61)
“I used to tell myself it was higher forces that brought us together too,” he confessed, a single teardrop rolling down his cheek. “I wanted to change, prayed for it. Every move I tried to make only left me feeling more helpless, more afraid to trust. When I called you, I prayed that if I could just make one good friend, it would make all the difference. And when I felt an instant attraction to you, I got scared all over again. Because of you, and your willingness to help me, I was able to take those first steps out of the dark. How could I not forgive you? You saved me.”
They had made such a muddle of things, all while trying to do the right thing.
“I guess when it comes to matters of the heart, truth is the right way to go. And if I was being brutally honest, I would’ve admitted I felt something shift the night we met too. How many times in your life are you lucky enough to meet someone who feels the same way you do? I wish I had told you how I felt when I started feeling it. I wish I hadn’t tried to change you. I wish I had joined you. You were perfect the way you were. You still are.”
“Oh no.” He was quick to contradict. “I wouldn’t have traded that experience for anything. I never felt so alive or laughed so hard as when you were introducing me to the world.”
“Then can’t we move past this? Can’t you change your mind and stay?”
Tristan slowly shook his head, his eyes drinking her all in, filled with the need for her understanding. “I don’t want to. I’ve experienced this life as much as I care to. It isn’t for me. I want to go home.”
“I get that,” Zoey said, trying to curb the misery. Despite them baring their souls and the connection they had, it wasn’t enough.
“I used to think my hasty departure from the island was to escape the ghosts of my grandparents. And Paradise Cove was indeed their dream. I never had to make it mine, but I felt an obligation to. I think I still do. And I love it there. I miss it. I’m so grateful to you for everything you did to show me the big city. I can make this decision with no regrets. I’m not missing anything, except the rat race.”
“I get that too. It’s the right call.” Without realizing it, Zoey had begun to take books off the shelves and fill an empty box. An unconscious attempt to keep busy so that she wouldn’t have to deal with how to move forward in her life without him. “None of it means I can’t help you pack. Maybe we can share one last pizza.”
“Lady, you’ve got yourself a deal.”
They resumed packing up the books and the silence was comfortable, broken up sporadically when she discovered books she knew.
“Your grandmother really had a thing for Jackie Collins and Rosemary Rogers.”
“Those were definitely her favorites.”
Zoey struggled to keep the conversation light, when she longed to beg him to stay. He had made his decision and it was based on all the right reasons. To lay a guilt trip on him wouldn’t be fair. He wasn’t saying much either, a sign she took to mean he was having a difficult time as well. But she wanted to remember him confident and sure. She loved him enough to plaster on a brave face.
When she started with a fresh section of books, Zoey pulled one off the shelf and literally hugged it to her, before holding it out to show him.
“The Joy of Cooking. It’s the first cookbook my parents gave me. I set it on fire by accident when I put it too close to the stove.” She laughed at the memory while fanning the pages. “A pot boiled over and caused a flare-up and POOF! Singed pages soufflé.”
When she looked at him again, Tristan was studying her. Zoey started to blush. She would miss that look and everything that came after it.
“What’s the first thing you’re going to do once you get back?” she said, to get her mind off it.
“Wow. I almost don’t know where to start. Paradise Cove is going to undergo a complete remodel. I’m going to modernize it and reopen it as a luxury resort, maybe with a spa.”
“That’s pretty ambitious.”
“I know! But if I can put people to work, that has to be a good thing, right?”
She couldn’t hold back the sigh. How rare was a person who always thought about the good he could do? She wondered if he had any idea just how special he was.
“I was looking to hire someone to help with that,” he continued. “A right-hand man, if you will. Only it doesn’t have to be a guy. Someone with good organizational skills and attention to detail. And preferably who likes to cook.”
His intention slowly dawned on her as he continued to stare. “I think I know someone who fits that bill.”
He gave her a grin and a wink, which was all she needed to rush to him, in perfect timing with the opening of his arms to welcome her back into them. His mouth crashed down onto hers and his arms wrapped around her.
“What the hell took you so long to ask?” she scolded him when he finally let her up for air.
“My finesse needs work. And I didn’t want to pressure you. And as soon as you walked through the door, I had made up my mind you were coming with me, even if I had to kidnap you.”
“Gotta love those higher forces at work.” She kissed him again. Nothing would ever feel as good as being in his arms.
“With you by my side, I feel like I could conquer the world and at the same time no longer need to.”