To Love and Be Loved(22)

‘Let it out . . .’ Bella urged.

‘She’s right, let it all out, babby,’ Ruby added.

‘No one can see you, Merry, you can have a good old cry.’ Bella smoothed the hair from her forehead.

But Merrin stayed silent. She couldn’t cry because it didn’t seem real, any of it.





CHAPTER FIVE


JARVIS

Knowing the wedding service would now be in full swing, Jarvis had parked the cart up on the flat and was giving Daisy a drink and a good rub behind the ears when Robin came haring around the corner with some urgency, his suit jacket flying behind him, eyes wide and the smooth soles of his lace-up shoes slipping on the warm pavement.

‘You’re not going to believe it, Jarv!’ He bent over, one arm leaning on the cart, as he caught his breath. ‘He’s only gone and done a runner, left her standing at the altar! He stood her up, he bloody stood her up!’ He was breathless, but agitated too, excited almost, by the turn of events.

‘Is this a wind-up? Are you joking? Because it’s not funny.’

There hadn’t been much amusing about the whole day. It had been painful for Jarvis to be the one who drove Merrin to the church where she was to marry a man who was taller, richer and luckier than him. Luckier because it was Merrin who would walk up the aisle and take his hand, Merrin who he would wake up to the very next day . . . but there it was. Jarvis knew he was the only one able to confidently navigate the lanes with the cart and keep control of old Daisy, who trusted him. It was a favour for Ben and for Merrin: a gift of goodbye.

He had been aware of Ben taking his seat next to him on the leather bench at the helm of the cart and had felt his arm across his back, giving him a brief hug. The contact and kindness had been enough to cause his tears to bloom once again. Sniffing, he had kept his eyes down to hide his distress, keen that no one saw the state of him, and with the girls in position, he had gently clicked his tongue, uttered commands and pulled the soft leather reins, steering Daisy to the left and right along the cobbled streets of Port Charles. With the laughing women on the flower-filled cart, the horse plodded slowly on, as if she, like he, was reluctant to arrive, knowing that after this long-planned-for trip, nothing would ever be quite the same again.

‘You’re doing great, Jarv,’ Ben had encouraged. ‘You’re doing great.’

He had got the impression the man meant more than just his ability to steer Daisy along the path. He hadn’t watched them alight, but had taken his time, wanting to put distance between himself and the bridal party on this fine, sun-filled day.

‘Seriously, Robin, are you winding me up?’ Sweating and with his heart racing, he felt the stir of drama in his veins and knew that if this were true he should act, do something!

‘I’m not! I swear on my life!’ The man put his hand on his heart. ‘He never showed. Everyone’s going home or going nuts! I can’t believe it!’

‘Me neither,’ Jarvis concurred, trying to take it in. ‘Why? Why would he do that?’

‘Who knows?’ Robin caught his breath. ‘Christ, Jarv, what do you think Ben’ll do when he gets hold of him? I almost fear for the lad.’

‘I wouldn’t like to say, and never mind Ben, wait till Ruby gets hold of him.’ She had a certain reputation for being lively. He felt something spark inside him that felt a lot like relief – not at the sadness Merrin might be feeling or for the humiliation she had endured, but simply at the thought that the girl he loved was not taking the name of or spending the night with Digby Mortimer. He decided to keep his relief to himself. ‘Did you see Merry? How is she?’ The enormity of the situation started to sink in, and one thing was for sure, this was no time for celebration, not if Merrin was hurting. He would never want that.

‘No, I didn’t see her. The vicar gave a short speech and all hell broke loose. Some of the women in the church started crying and Heather and Granny Kellow went roaring up the aisle like they were on a mission! I’ve never seen the old girl move so fast.’

‘I’d best get the cart back round; they are going to need a lift home.’

‘They could walk?’ Robin suggested. ‘It’s not like they have much to celebrate.’

Robin was right about that.

‘Help me get the flowers off!’ Jarvis set to, removing the pretty braids that had been so admired not an hour since. He figured Merrin would need no reminder of the journey she had taken, laughing among the flowers . . . Robin tugged on a plait of ivy and tossed it to the floor along with the bunches of lavender that had been tied into the corners. By the time they had finished, the cart, whilst still in better condition than it had been for years, was a lot less ostentatious.

‘Come on, Daisy. Come on, old girl!’ Jarvis climbed up into the seat and, with a soft click to the roof of his mouth, set off towards the church to collect the girl he quietly and discreetly loved.

Her face . . . he knew he would never forget it. Flanked by her parents, she had a look of utter confusion, as if she didn’t know which way to turn. Her mouth open, she was gasping for breath and without the words to convey her sorrow that her eyes had no such trouble relaying.

He wanted to run to her, take her in his arms and drag her away from the bloody church; he wanted to hide her, protect her and help her heal, and if it wouldn’t have been so ridiculous and misplaced, he wanted to place her beautiful head against his chest and cradle her better. He wanted her to know that Digby was a fool, an idiot, a madman to let her slip through his fingers! And that he, Jarvis Cardy, would never hurt a hair on her head or let her down. He would make sure she understood that what he felt for her was a heart-thumping, soul-sparkling love that filled him up. And he knew he would die a happy man if he could wake and look at her face across the table each morning; happy because he knew there was nowhere else he would want to be and no one else he would want to be with. She could rely on him. He would give her the fairy story, friendship, respect and deep, deep love. He wanted to put down strong roots with her that entwined and grew deep, going all the way to the mines, where their ancestors had dug in the dark for tin.