There's Something About Sweetie(25)

Uh-oh. Pappa continued to stare at him, eyes narrowed, jaw set. That was never good. That was his boardroom someone’s-gonna-get-fired face. He’d seen it once when he was a kid and Pappa had to take him in to work because Ma was sick. He’d never forgotten it. It was … make-your-butt-cheeks-clench formidable.

Ashish sat. He wanted to ask a million questions, but instinct told him to wait them out. Let them give him what they had, and then he’d see what to share with them. It was a careful game of cat and mouse he’d honed over the years.

“Ashish … kahaan thay tum? Where were you this morning?” Pappa’s voice was low, almost just a growl. Ma put a warning hand on his knee, but he ignored it and kept glaring at Ashish.

“I … told you.” Ashish looked at Ma, though he didn’t like lying to her again. But this time it wasn’t just about him. It was about Sweetie, too. “I was at, um, Elijah’s.”

Ma looked at him, her expression soft and hurt. “You told me you were at Oliver’s.”

“Th-that’s what I meant,” Ashish said quickly. “Elijah was there too.”

“Really.” Pappa leaned closer. “Do you want to change your story?”

“Don’t cross-examine him, Kartik,” Ma said gently. Then, looking at Ashish: “Oliver and Elijah came by, looking for you.”

Dang it. Busted. He kept his face neutral.

“So, let me ask you again: Where were you, Ashish?” Pappa said, leaning back against the couch. He really would make a great don if he ever wanted a career change. Get out of the tech and business game, get into the breaking-kneecaps market.

“Look, I don’t know what’s up with the Indian Inquisition thing you’ve got going on here,” Ashish said, crossing his arms. “But you’re not getting anything out of me.”

Ma looked from Ashish to Pappa and then back again. “Hai bhagwan, you’re both so much like each other, it’s scary sometimes.” Sighing, she said, “Ashish, nobody’s trying to interrogate you. We just want to know the truth. Were you with Celia?”

Ashish stared at them. “What? No!”

Ma held up her hands. “We’re not judging, beta. But when I saw you all dressed up … I just had a feeling. And then you lied to us, so … Beta, she’s broken your heart. Is it really worth the pain?”

Oh great. Now his parents thought he was a loser who’d go back to some girl who’d treated him like dirt and left him a zombie with no game. Ashish ran a hand through his hair and put his elbows on his knees before looking at his parents again. “Look, Ma, Pappa … I wasn’t with Celia. I promise.”

Ma’s face relaxed, though Pappa’s remained thunderous.

Ashish hesitated. He’d told Sweetie he was willing to go behind their parents’ backs, and he didn’t want to renege on that. But he also couldn’t keep lying when he was being interrogated like this. Don’t ask, don’t tell was a different matter. “The truth is, though, that I did lie to you. And I’m sorry. I was with Sweetie Nair.” He took pains to pronounce her last name correctly—so it rhymed with “buyer,” not “hair”—because he didn’t want to give his parents another reason to jump on him.

He watched as Pappa’s face melted from pure thunder to vague confusion and back to murderous rage. Ma froze into a mask of neutrality. It was actually kind of comical.

“Sweetie Nair?” Ma asked. “What were you doing with her?”

“Sweetie Nair! Whose mother said she wanted nothing to do with the idea of you two dating? What were you thinking, Ashish!” Pappa roared. Turning to Ma, he said, “What do you think he was doing? Probably up to hanky-panky just like with those other girls! Are you trying to ruin her life?”

Ashish looked at them in disbelief. “Okay, wow. Can we all just calm down and tone down the Bollywood theatrics? Thanks for the vote of confidence, by the way, Pappa. I wasn’t ruining her life with ‘hanky-panky.’” He did the air quotes a little savagely, stabbing the air with his fingers. “If you must know, we were … running.”

The confusion was back, on both Ma’s and Pappa’s faces this time. “Running?” they said together. “Is that some kind of slang for ‘hanky-panky’?” Pappa added in irritation.

“Will you stop with the hank—okay, look.” Ashish took a breath to flush away his annoyance. “Sweetie Nair texted me last night. She heard you and her mom talking, Ma, and she also heard you say that her weight was a stupid reason for her mom to say she couldn’t date me.” He held up a hand when Ma opened her mouth to protest. “I know you didn’t say it in those exact words, but that was the gist of it and Sweetie heard that part. So she wanted to talk to me in person. And …” He shrugged. “She isn’t a skinny supermodel, so she wanted me to see that she isn’t lazy or whatever the stereotypes are for fat people.” He had to force himself to say the word neutrally, like she had. “And the truth is, she impressed the heck out of me. She totally kicked my a—butt on the track. She’s really nice, too, and smart. And so … we both decided that we do want to date.”

“Oh ho! So you both decided?” Pappa said, his face getting pinker and pinker with each word. “Without asking your parents?”