The Falling (Brightest Stars, #1)(91)

“A coincidence is like bumping into an old friend at the movies or thinking about someone you haven’t heard from in a while and then seeing their name pop up next to a text.” Could it really be a coincidence that Kael and my dad and Austin and Mendoza and Phillip and everyone, literally everyone, were connected? I took a breath and continued, “The fact that my dad and Phillip and Kael are all in the same company feels like a bizarre circumstance.”

“It does, but you get to decide what that means for you, Karina.”

I stared at Elodie as she spoke, trying to take in how wise and comforting she was. People often underestimated her ability to read situations. Yes, she seemed young and bubbly, and adorably French, but her instinct and perspective blew me away.

Though I was ashamed to admit it, my first impulse was to lie again, to protect myself, but Elodie was trying to be a friend to me, and I desperately wanted to let her.

“Kael was here the whole time you were gone, and we’ve been seeing each other, well, not dating, but we were hanging out since the day we met.” My cheeks flushed, I barely had any energy, but the bit I did have was pure guilt.

“Did you sleep together? I’m not judging, only curious,” she asked me.

I shook my head. I couldn’t meet her eyes anymore, so I leaned my head onto her shoulder again.

“We didn’t. He didn’t even try.” I stopped mid-thought and had a realization. “Wow, that should have been my sign. He didn’t even want to sleep with me.”

“Be glad you didn’t, then,” Elodie said softly. I nodded in agreement.

A little corner, all the way in the back of my heart, the only part that hadn’t gone numb, began to ache again. Kael’s face flashed through my mind, him smiling at me, us in my kitchen, us falling onto my bed. The way he paid attention to the smallest things I said, the way his eyes lit up when we shared a favorite song.

“I think the other things we did were more intimate than sex. If we had only hooked up, this would be so much easier to get over.” I shuddered. How did I get myself into such a mess?

She took that in. “Yeah, the sex is the easy part, isn’t it?”

We nodded at each other.

“Do you want me to tell you that I think you shouldn’t see Martin anymore and that things sometimes don’t happen for a reason?”

I sat quiet for a moment.

“I don’t know why it feels like my world is ending,” I said softly, as Elodie’s hand stroked my shoulder and down my back. I felt like a child curled up next to her. “I’ve only been this hurt once in my life, when my mom left. Maybe I should just get used to the fact that everyone who comes into my life will leave at some point.” I saw my life as a revolving door. I got over my mother. I would surely get over this.

“What am I even saying?” I continued, closing my eyes. My mother’s face flashed behind my lids. “My mom leaving was so much worse. Kael’s a stranger. I can’t believe I’m even comparing them.”

Elodie breathed in a deep breath. I couldn’t look at her when she spoke. “Loss can’t be measured in that way. If it was that simple, life would be much easier.”

Her words sat with me, and as they settled, I felt a bit of relief in my lungs.

“People are selfish.” I sighed. “I’ve always known that. I think I lost my mind a bit.”

“People do things they don’t plan to do when they’re in love.”

I let out a cackle, overcompensating for the possibility of truth there. “I’m so not in love.”

“Well, it might feel just as painful as if you were,” she said, pursing her lips. “I thought Martin was a nice guy. I really did, I’m sorry that I introduced you to him.”

The size of Elodie’s heart was so admirable. I wondered if things would have been different had I confided in her about Kael from the start. None of this was her fault, and I wanted to tell her that.

I sighed. “I lied to you about Kael, I’m the one who’s sorry.”

She shook her head and a piece of her hair fell from the low ponytail resting just above her neck. She tucked it behind her ear.

“Karina?” Elodie’s bright blue eyes met mine. She lifted one hand and rested it on her stomach. “Do you think your dad was telling the truth that Phillip will be home soon?”

My heart ached. “I wish I knew. Has Phillip not mentioned this to you?”

“No, he didn’t.” Elodie’s tone was solemn. “Did Kael say anything?”

I shook my head, but wished I had something to tell her. It made me worry how easily she could be hurt, and with people like Kael and my dad around her, I wanted her to be more guarded when it came to trusting others. If I ever found a way to look at my father again, I would try to find out what was going on. It was the least I could do for my only friend.

Elodie tapped her finger against the tip of my nose, making my eyes close and my face crinkle. “Let’s not change this to me.” Her smile was a sweet and knowing one, and I realized I hadn’t even asked her about her trip!

“Okay, but first you have to tell me about Atlanta. Did you have fun? Were The Wives nice to you?”

She smiled, giving my arm a playful squeeze. “Absolutely fun! But it was very crowded everywhere and the shopping was too expensive. I had a good time, but it will be curious if they ask me to hang out again.”