Scared of Beautiful (Scared #1)(33)

“Boy, you really were trying to get as far away from me as possible,” I say, stunned.

“I can’t move, even if I wanted to. My life is there: job, Daniella’s school, and my fiancée.” Shana looks down at the ground as she says the last part. I rub my temples. California? “Are you ready to get Daniella?” Shana asks.

“Sure,” I say, “but before we do, are we good? We need to be, to do this right.” She nods and smiles. I stand and give her a reassuring hug. No spark, not even the slightest hint of what I felt for Shana once upon a time is left. And for a fleeting moment, I wish it was Maia in my arms instead.

Daniella and Shana walk out holding hands. Shana’s already told her that there’s another surprise. I feel like I should have put a shirt on for this moment. But to me, it’s amazing, regardless of the attire. Daniella sits in front of me and stares at me with big, green flecked brown eyes. When I look at them, it’s like looking into my own eyes in a mirror.

“Daniella, this is Jackson. Jackson is your daddy,” Shana says gently.

Daniella’s face shows the slightest hint of confusion before it lights up in a smile. “It’s nice to meet you, Daniella,” I say gently reaching out a hand to her to shake. Instead she barrels into me and wraps her arms tightly around my neck.

“This is the best day ever! Mommy said I would meet you one day! She told me you were super nice,” she says grinning. A month ago, I didn’t even know she existed, but the feeling of her little arms around my neck is euphoric. I smile up at Shana, and a tear slides down her cheek.

“I’ll be inside,” she says, as Daniella and I sit and swing on the love seat on the porch.

She talks animatedly about school and her friends, favorite toys, her mother and Michael’s upcoming wedding, her role as flower girl. She laughs when I tell her I still go to school, too. She tells me that Maia is pretty and that I’m very lucky, which causes me to laugh out loud. Daniella is so bright and happy, and for all Shana’s faults with regards to me, Daniella is clearly very much loved. For that, to Shana I am grateful.

“Lunch!” my mother calls from the screen door.

“We’d better go before my new grandma gets mad,” she says, taking my hand.

We walk into the kitchen, where I burst into laughter when I see Maia wrestling with a piece of dough. My mother turns to me and says cheekily, “This one’s a keeper, after she spends a few more days with me in the kitchen learning, that is.” She winks, and Maia laughs, throwing her hands up.

“Guilty! I’m not very domestic.”

After the homemade quesadillas for lunch, courtesy of my mother and Maia, Shana, Jade, and Daniella say their goodbyes. We make a date to see them tomorrow for an ice cream, which causes Daniella to squeal with excitement. Maia, my parents, and I sit around the table casually chatting for the next hour. Maia handled herself so well today. If I wasn’t sure that I was in love with this girl before, I am now. My mother shares some of my less finer childhood moments with her, before Maia and I excuse ourselves to my room.

Maia doesn’t judge my modest childhood home at all. I admit, I was slightly embarrassed about her coming here after she had just bought an apartment in cash that could fit two of these houses. We lay on my bed, and Maia rests her head softly on my chest.

“Thank you,” I say, twisting tendrils of her hair between my fingers.

“For?” she asks, looking up at me.

“For being so amazing today. I was worried how everything would turn out. Somehow knowing you’d be there at the end of it all helped,” I reply.

“Daniella’s easy to fall in love with, your parents are amazing, and as long as you are okay with Shana, then so am I,” she answers simply. I lean down and her lips meet mine. Maia almost seems too good to be true, and I pray that my streak of good things turning to shit is finally over.





Chapter 17




Maia

I’m proud of myself for today, I must admit. If Jackson only knew that the whole of me was a very deep well of insecurity. The perks of being an ex-socialite: I can turn the fa?ade on, and put the walls up when necessary. Pretend like I don’t wish that this whole situation was simpler, that all these complications would all just disappear. But for that to happen, Jackson would have to disappear too, and my body stiffens, threatening to break into sobs at just the thought. I could forget about everything, as I lay right here, entangled in him. We could. Hell, I could die right here.

“So, what happens now?” I ask feigning nonchalance. My head stays against his chest, too afraid to meet his eyes.

“With?” Jackson asks.

“With Daniella and Shana, I mean. Do you need to move back here?” I gulp back the knot that’s forming in my throat, almost afraid to hear what Jackson will say.

“Nothing. Shana lives in California, she’s engaged. Has no desire to move back here at all. So I guess we go back to Providence, I look for a part time job there, and I’ll see her when I can.” Jackson’s reply causes my whole body to sag with relief.

“So stay with me.” The words leave my mouth before I can suppress them. It’s one thing to get this close to someone so quickly, and a whole other thing to ask him to move in with you. Shit! What did I do?

“Maia, not that I wouldn’t love to wake up next to you every day, but, it’s just, have you really thought this through? Are you sure that’s what you want?” Jackson tilts my chin and eyes me seriously.